Debra does some dumb movie, hangs out in woods with nerds

(Big props to Miquelio for this one) Debra McMichael Williams/Austin Whatever… you know, of “PUPPIES!” fame, plays the role of “Reina” in a new movie called “Gathering of Heroes,” set to be released in 2009. And in 2008, no one gives a fuck. Seriously, did you watch that clip? Someone got their hands on a bunch of stills from filming, took them into Windows Movie Maker, and set them to the tune of “Whiny Cunt Whining About Something.” And I’m supposed to want to go out and watch this? No offense to my friend and Hold For Swank bassist Max, but if I wanted to see nerds hit each other on the helmet with wooden swords, I’d sneak into a renaissance faire and laugh at them in person. (Seriously, no offense, Max; I might need to pick up some work in the fall.)

Oh, and look at about 1:07; there’s a picture of big, buff Debra that makes her look like “someone twice your size on top of you beatin’ on you in a steroid rage.” Haha, that joke will never get old. But seriously, Debra looks haggard as shit these days, like someone stretched tooled leather over a mannequin. She looks like a suitcase on the shelf at Salvation Army. If nothing else, the chick in the Braveheart face paint is kinda cute, and in movies full of insecure nerds, someone always gets naked to finally leap that first hurdle of bravery. “I feel so liberated!” That’s cool, I’ll be sitting in the back row of the theater, sweetheart. -Eric

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