WrestleMania Preview #3- Money In The Bank


Hey gang, it’s time for yet another WrestleMania audio preview. This time Kevin and Jeremy tackle a match near and dear to our hearts, the Money In The Bank match. They go over each competitor and the chances of them winning. They specifically concentrate on some guys but then totally ignore the others. Take a guess on who gets ignored. Oh and for fun, Jeremy, unfortunately,  gives away his pick very quickly but then Kevin holds his cards until the very end. So download and listen already! -Jeremy

Money In The Bank

Past WrestleMania Preview Audios

25 Diva Battle Royal

Rey vs JBL

Tazz quits WWE, may leave behind extra “Z”…

Shhh, Vince, gahd damn, Im tryin ta work ovah heeere!

"Shhh, Vince, gahd damn, I'm tryin' ta work ovah heeere!"

… if only he was leaving it behind for Zeus to shave into his head.

According to Prowrestling.net, Tazz finished up his time with WWE on Monday night after the Smackdown tapings and is letting his contract run out. “Wow, man, just wow,” says Jeremy, correctly. Tazz had been, here and there, the most listenable thing on headset WWE had to offer. He was funny. He was smart. He was gelling with Jim Ross on Smackdown and often acted as the (superior) play-by-play announcer for god-awful Michael Cole on SnackTown and Mike Adamle on ECW. And WWE let him go, because it’s a company full of idiots. (For those who watch old ECW shows on WWE 24/7, you may have gotten the idea that neither Tazz nor Joey Styles feel all that comfortable these days, so maybe this is for the best for Tazz, but it’s not in my personal best interests, so booo.)

Of course the rumors and speculation have already started flying over what WWE will do, particularly with WrestleMania 25 (the 24th anniversary of the first one, says Dusty, correctly) on the horizon. Perhaps Dusty Rhodes could be called up from FCW for the night. Perhaps JBL will wrestle in the first match, retire, and then join Jim Ross at ringside later. Hell, maybe Vince will call up his old buddy Jesse Ventura and get him to sit in for a night. We haven’t heard a good “Terry, Tyrel and Jade” shout-out at WrestleMania in years. Anyhoo, this is pretty unexpected and awfully stupid, but in this case, I really do wish my homeboy Tazz the best in his future endeavors. -Eric

WrestleMania Preview #2

Hey, I'm a virgin!

Hey, I’m a virgin!

Yeah that’s right bitches, Kevin and Jeremy are back with match #2 on the way to covering all nine announced matches for WrestleMania 25.  I told you we’d be doing this and damnit all if we aren’t right on schedule. There is even a picture to give you and idea of what we talk about or does it? So give it a listen it’s worth wasting your precious fifteen minute break at work or even taking time from lunch. Really, between the two of us, you don’t really need to eat all that much do you? -Jeremy

WrestleMania 25 Preview #2

And here is Preview #1

WrestleMania Preview Begins

It's a celebration damnit!

It’s a celebration damnit!

Alright gang, Kevin and Jeremy got some juice in their system and are going over dedicating a small audio show for each WrestleMania 25 match. They are only fifteen minutes so listen on your lunch break and then come back tonight for yet another. We’ll be posting two a day until we catch up to Sunday. Consider this the kick off to our never-ending coverage of WrestleMania 25 since we feel guilty about not going this year. See, our guilt is now your benefit.  On top of that you’ll find a nice morsel from Eric, Dusty and Jordan covering the five best and worst WresleManias as voted on by you, the Stunt Granny fans. On top of all that we’ll still be covering all the big stories and proceed to make fun of them. So don’t fret, there will be plenty to enjoy here on Stuntgranny.com. -Jeremy

WrestleMania Audio #1

Speaking of shitty movies: Kurt Angle in “End Game”

This is Dusty's future if Charter Communications keeps fucking with him.

This is Dusty's future if Charter Communications keeps fucking with him.

(CLICK HERE — http://www.northshore-pictures.com/video/EndGame_Trailer/EndGame_Trailer.html — FOR TRAILER)

Just as John Cena’s movie “12 Rounds” is wallowing in its own filth, Robert Miqueli unsheaths this piece of artistic embarrassment for us. Yep, Kurt Angle, your Olympic hero, is now a Hollywood star. If by “Hollywood” I mean “a few crew members’ houses and an office set featuring a Gateway computer from 1998.” That’s right, it’s “End Game,” the film that stars Angle as a serial something or other (murderer? rapist? pill-popper? oh, that’s real life) who cons his way into various homes as a birthday clown. Now, don’t get any ideas, Lenny Lane, because I’m sure that gruff police chief is gonna hunt Angle down despite a few miscues, outsmarts and red herrings. The cinematography in this piece of shit is bottom-notch as well, with less motion than that dead hooker I fucked last weekend. Well, come on, let’s be honest here; if I’m gonna make fun of Angle, I might as well make fun of myself. And given the rumors circulating about Karen Angle’s love life, Kurt has been fucking a dead hooker for years!

Back to the point at hand, this movie looks terrible, has terrible acting, the camera shots are amateur, and the story is pretty much every single other contemporary murder-mystery, except the producers scored a real coup landing Kurt “Just Call Me Brando” Angle. One of the actresses plays a stripper, so we might get to see some tits. Otherwise, this is a drunk-movie-watching-night-only rental.

Please stay tuned for a little background on North Shore Pictures, because I figured something was fishy here:

Bruce and Bryan Koehler grew up in the Pittsburgh area both attended Clarion University of Pennsylvania for Broadcast Communications and Speech Communication and Theater…. (Editor’s note: That’s where Angle went to college.)

Producer Dave Hawk is a former body building champion holding the prestigious titles of both “Mr. USA” and “Mr. World”. As manager/agent for Olympic Gold Metalist, world Wrestling Entertainment, and TNA Champion Kurt Angle, Dave has over twenty years experience in the sports entertainment, managemant, and media relations industry.

And no, I did not proofread nor edit that. It’s straight from their Web site. “Metalist”? Christ. If Kurt Angle is the brains of this operation, I’ll eat my hat. -Eric

12 Rounds Tanks Badly

Out of theaters April 3.

Out of theaters April 3

Well here’s no surprise; John Cena’s second movie “12 Rounds” bombed badly on it’s opening weekend. There really isn’t a positive way to spin this but WWE will do all it can for sure. The top grossing movie , according to Variety, “Monsters vs Aliens” raked in $58.2 million dollars and the the other new release “The Haunting In Connecticut” pulled in $23 million. So it’s quite clear people went out to the movies this weekend but no one gave a shit about a WWE movie and their unbankable star.

Now some are going to say this is still an acceptable total as it didn’t cost much in comparison to major movies and that DVD sales may put this movie in the black financially. The problem though is that WWE studios is in decline. This is the second bomb in a row and it starred their top guy. Cena is their Rock, Hogan, Austin and he can’t draw in theaters. Hell Austin couldn’t do it as well. This is a bad sign for WWE Studios in general.

They also may make a profit , albeit a small one, and it can be spun this is a good but Vince McMahon isn’t in the business of spending $15-20 million dollars to make $100,000. The gamble isn’t worth it. WWE may want to push ahead with more films but at this juncture and until the final numbers for “12 Rounds” come out it just isn’t worth the risk financially. -Jeremy

Stunt Granny Audio #37

Dusty and Eric are back to bitch about everything wrestling-related they can think of. Nothing is safe in this hour-long-plus audio: What’s the over/under on how many Jim Rose circus events Jake Roberts shows up to? What will that white trash couple settle for if they try to sue Chris Jericho for last months’ altercation? Who WOULDN’T shit in Juventud Guerrera’s bag if given the chance? And why are Raw’s ratingst tanking? (Hint: Because it kinda sucks right now.) All that and Steve Doll, dead as a door nail, this week!

P.S. I tried something different with the audio, boosting the volume but cutting it off before it peaks. It shouldn’t blow your ears out or anything, but let us know if this is in any way an improvement.

Stunt Granny #37

Where’s Randy Orton?

I have to get this thing off, someone pooped in it!

I have to get this thing off, someone pooped in it!

According to The Sun (and do I even need to mention the real source?) Juventud Guerrera accused Konnan of crapping in his gym bag at the second event that he participated in for AAA in Mexico.  Konnan denies doing it and even got into a fight with Juvi after the accusation.  Konnan knows who did it though and it’s his dog Baxter.  He ate a whole wheel of cheese and crapped in Juvi’s bag.  Baxter speaks Spanish so he’s the perfect fall man that no one would ever ask.  If this story gets any more juicy, we’ll squirt out another post. – Kevin

Some guy named Kennedy might be coming back? Eh.

Dude, just stay home and wail on those guts. Unless she married you for your money, which you sure aint making off Behind Enemy Lines: Colombia residuals. Blecch.

Dude, just stay home and wail on those guts. Unless she married you for your money, which you sure ain't making off "Behind Enemy Lines: Colombia" residuals.

According to Prowrestling.net, Ahmed Johnson Mr. Kennedy told the UK Sun he’s at 95 percent health following recent shoulder surgery, but he wouldn’t be able to cough up the other 5 percent in time for WrestleMania. Pussy.

“It’s terrible,” he said. “I’ve been with the company for four years. This is my fourth WrestleMania. It’s the second one I’ll be riding the pine for. It’s like your team goes to the Super Bowl and you get to sit on the bench and watch. You get a ring, but you don’t really feel like you earned it.”

Waaah. Honestly, the thrill is gone and the luster is off. I used to be a huge Mr. Kennedy fan — shit, I used to think he was a shoe-in at world title status at one point — but he’s spent more time out of sight and ot of mind than a bottle of mouthwash in a TNA fan’s bathroom. It will take a hell of an effort from both Kennedy himself and the writing staff to get people interested in Ken again. And why should they? He’s just gonna pull his hammie on a hip toss and sit at home for six more months. Rub some dirt on it and get back in the game, ya weiner. -Eric

Come One, Come All…

For my next trick, I'll regurgitate the snake I have in my belly.

For my next trick, I'll regurgitate the snake I have in my belly.

It was mentioned in this story on Prowrestling.net, originated at Slamwrestling.com, that Jake “The Snake” Roberts and Kizarny aka Sinn Bodhi aka Nick Cvjetkovich will be main eventing the “Jim Rose Circus Show vs. Jake  ‘The Snake’ Roberts Tour”.  They say there will be a hardcore match that will feature “Picture something with a lot of circus stunts and crazy feats of pain mixed with some really weird trippy hardcore and lots of mayhem.”  I wonder what those circus stunts will be.  I’m hoping we get to watch Jake down a fifth of Vodka without using his hands.  Later in the match, Nick can light one of Jake’s burps on fire and then eat the fire.  The possibilities are endless which is great for when Jake passes out over in the corner of the ring and Kizarny has to cover him with a sheet and make him disappear. – Kevin

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