The Art of Wrestling – Father’s Day Part I

Thanks for the Edge Teddy Bear Little Guy!

Thanks for the Edge Air Freshner Little Guy!

With Father’s Day this coming weekend, the WWE is at it again with their holiday packages. I could make some predictable not very funny jokes about various nuts, but I’m not going to take that route. Instead, I’m going to look at the Edge package that is both interesting and with a few of the items, begs the question “What the fuck is that doing in there?”

I haven’t seen the DVD, but I can comment on the cover. Edge has the perfect smug look on his face which fits his character. Putting additional pictures of him in his sunglasses is a nice touch. I wonder why the WWE uses the block lettering for “Edge” and the R in “Rated R” but the remainder of his merchandise uses Gothic lettering. They’re very consistent about it so no ball busting necessary. It is also a very cool cover which any dad that takes their child to a WWE event would be glad to have gracing their DVD collection.

Next in order is the Edge waste basket. I like that WWE Shop provides you with all of the pictures used on a round object to get a feel for it. I like the two action photos but am a little suspect on his studio photo because he looks like he’s trying too hard to look evil. His bent arm just seems to be hanging there like he said “Awww shucks” which is decidedly un-Edge like. The lettering as noted already alternates. The “Crude, Lewd and Tattooed” cracks me up a bit since none of his tattoos seem to be featured in any of his pictures on the waste basket. I hope dad needs has extra trash in his workshop because mom isn’t going to allow this one in the main part of the house.

Sweatbands

Nothing says cool like sweatbands.

I’ll lump the next two items together since they’re both wristbands.  I’ll start with the “Rated R” sweat bands. The WWE sticks with the lettering pattern but the embroidery kills the idea of sweat bands which is to soak up sweat. Do people actually use sweat bands these days? I say no. The leather cuffs are more suited for the stereotyped WWE audience. If you’d replace the Rated R Superstars with spikes, it’d remind me a bit of Kerry King’s spiked cuff. It’s nice and simple. Mom might want to steal it though when her and dad head to the Poison concert this summer.

Kerry-King

If you don't listen to good music, Kerry King is Slayer's guitar player.

Last up for Part I is the Edge Air Freshner. I certainly saved the worst for last. The mudflap women leaning on the star aren’t highlighted to be offset from the black background. The blob behind the star doesn’t help out either. On the other side, they stole a line from Chester Cheeto and altered it to say “It’s Easy” “Being Sleazy.”  Dad would make this air freshner smell like vomit in a heart beat. – Kevin

%d bloggers like this: