Stunt Granny Audio #96

dad 

Eric and Kevin post up to discuss a little teensy bit of TNA (no, that wasn’t an AJ Styles height joke), including Eric’s dad’s opinions of the monster Abyss, and the viewership’s opinion of keeping iMPACT! tuned onto their TVs. The boys switch gears to the WWE, first dissecting Triple H’s leave of absence at the hands of Sheamus, then analyzing the draft in further detail than they’d even been able to do in writing! Amazed yet? Well, wait until you listen to the show! (50 minutes)

Stunt Granny Audio #96

Eric’s Blog: What we’re stuck with after the WWE Draft

crowded

"It's a little crowded in here, guys!"

Wow. After a real stinker of a WWE Draft, Monday Night Raw ended up more top heavy than Punky Brewster as a 16-year-old, while Smackdown is as barren of a wasteland as Bea Arthur’s dead crotch. Seriously, look at how the two rosters came out in the wash (I apologize if I forgot anyone, but my work computer is not conducive to skimming WWE.com’s roster pages):

Raw babyfaces
John Cena, Randy Orton, Triple H, John Morrison, Great Khali,
Evan Bourne, R-Truth, Mark Henry, Goldust, Yoshi Tatsu, Santino Marella, Primo
Hart Dynasty

Raw heels
Batista, Chris Jericho, Edge, Sheamus, The Miz
Ted DiBiase, Ezekiel Jackson, Carlito, Vladimir Kozlov, William Regal

Smackdown babyfaces
Undertaker, Rey Mysterio, Kofi Kingston, Christian
Matt Lardy, MVP, JTG, Kane, Finlay, Chris Masters, Curt Hawkins, Vance Archer

Smackdown heels
Jack Swagger, CM Punk, Big Show
Dolph Ziggler, Luke Gallows, Shad, Cody Rhodes, Drew McIntyre, Tyler Reks, Chavo Guerrero, Tyler Reks, Dude Busters

Now let’s ponder some of the questions that arise:

*Why keep Edge and Jericho on the same show when their feud has fallen flat?
*Why keep Punk and Rey on the same show when their feud is almost over?
*Who new does Cena have to feud with once Batista leaves? He’s already gone the Edge and Jericho routes, and Miz was treated like a retard last time he tried to feud with Cena.
*How is Morrison supposed to spread the proverbial wings when he’s being smothered by three babyfaces?
*How is Orton supposed to flourish when still stuck underneath Cena and Hunter (when Hunter is healthy)?
*Who is Swagger supposed to get some rub from? Undertaker, who will pin him every time? Rey, with whom they’d reeeeally have to stretch for a legit reason to feud? Or Kofi or Christian, who as of now have earned no right at a title shot?
*And what about Punk, who should be moving up the roster? Not by feuding with Taker, and definitely not in programs against Kofi or Christian.
*I hope the big surprising exciting final pick of the supplemental draft, MVP, has fun feuding with, ummm, Vance Archer? Tyler Reks? Blecch.

I suppose it’s nice that DiBiase has some babyfaces to match up against, and we might be lucky enough to get a Morrison-Miz program (but let’s allow Miz to put a few more wins under his belt against chumps like Goldust and Primo so he can run his mouth, thus causing fans to want to pay to see him get his comeuppance). But what of someone like Cody Rhodes, stuck on Smackdown to have completely unnatural feuds with Chris Masters and JTG? Or Matt Hardy, who, now with fewer people to fight for the buffet over, will gain at least another 75 pounds by the end of “his year,” 2010? Raw is only intriguing because it’s bursting with so damn many people; Smackdown is going to suck, and there’s no amount of shuckin’ and jivin’ Teddy Long can do to fix it.

punky brewster

Stupid reductions.

WWE Supplemental Draft “Live” Coverage

Hot women will not be at your fantasy draft or online for the WWE Supplemental Draft.

Since this draft is more slow moving than the NFL draft, I’m going to be giving my thoughts for the Supplemental Draft. I’ll be updating as soon as the WWE posts something. I may even throw in some thoughts from last night’s show.

First PickTo Raw: The Great Khali & Runjin Singh. Umm, if a bear shits in the in woods, does anyone care?

Second PickTo Smackdown: Chavo Guerrero. Too bad I used up one analogy for not caring already. Poor Chavo is a trooper but no one cares about him. Maybe he’ll be reunited with Vickie to give him some cred but he’ll probably stay as a Superstars iron man.

If I actually read all of these comments from other people in the WWE Universe, I’d be frothing mad. Some people might be playing the jack ass role but I get the feeling that way too many people are really this dumb –

[Comment From Matt Matt: ]

Chavo is so under-used and underrated, good pick for SD!

Third PickTo Smackdown: Cody Rhodes – Are they trying to make Smackdown as bush league as possible? Knobby knees is not going to replace Edge, John Morrision or R-Truth. It saves a Rhodes/DiBiase feud for a later time (I’m ignoring the possibility of DiBiase moving over later). Maybe they’re just punishing Matt Striker for making Michael Cole sound good twice within a month.

I’m going to continue this comedy festival that is a “draft”. Do a Teddy Long shuffle and click on the “Read More” button below.

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A Word About Matt Striker

I don’t hate Matt Striker. I don’t want Matt Striker to die in a fiery automobile accident. I simply want Matt Striker off my television set. He is absolutely terrible at what he does and does not deserve to be employed by the top wrestling company in the world. On Monday Night Raw, he accomplished the impossible – he made Michael Cole seem like someone worth listening to. I rue this day. – Dusty

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