Stunt Granny Audio #99

Balloons in the sky keep on turning..........

Yes that’s right just one episode away from the big hundred mark. So to make it special Stunt Granny brings you The Audio Experience version of the show. Dusty and Jeremy talk all things WWE this time around. Yes that means there is absolutely no talk of TNA and that is a good thing. Why bother wasting time on them anyway. The guys discuss the potential in Randy Orton’s injury and why it would have been a good thing if he was out longer. they also discuss the Daniel Bryan/Michael Cole angle and why it is good for WWE. There is also a lengthy discussion on Apocalypse Now and Apocalypse Now Redux. Oh they also throw in a discussion on Smackdown and how a CM Punk versus Kane feud will not be good. At all. No really, it can’t be good. So join the guys for an hour of your life and enjoy.

Stunt Granny Audio #99

PWO – Season 3 – Episode 17

I wonder if wrestling would ever use a drafting desk for a tables match.

 
Joe Dombrowski introduced the show and hyped the matches for the night. They showed the announce booth with Aaron Maguire sitting in the back ground who looked perturbed because Johnny Gargano was taking his spot at color. He was in the booth because it was a qualifying match for the Number One Contendership Tournament. The match was “The Megastar” Marion Fontaine against “M-Dogg 20” Matt Cross. Gargano gave his review of both wrestlers, giving them accolades. He did note he hasn’t had the time to grant Cross a title opportunity.
 
Cross snapped off some arm drags and pinned Fontaine in the corner. Cross hit a nice snap suplex. Dombrowski noted that Fontaine and Bobby Beverly have been attacked from behind. Gargano said that he could be the next target. Fontaine turned the match around by dropping Cross throat first over the top rope. Fontaine knocked Cross down and dropped an elbow on him. Fontaine clotheslined Cross and only got a two count after a pin. Gargano & Dombrowski combined to explain that Fontaine got his title shot a month ago by beating Cross. “M-Dogg” caught Fontaine with a bicycle kick. Cross hit a standing moonsault. Fontaine only got a two count after a death valley driver. Fontaine tried to super-plex Cross but he got knocked off the top rope. Cross played to the crowd and executed a shooting star press for the victory.
 
Analysis: Dombrowski & Gargano tried to cover for Fontaine by saying he trained “Lean” and has great cardio. I train that way too and I have more muscle than Fontaine even though I sit in an office all day long. Fontaine was sporting some new tights which is good considering he has a new persona. Both men were strong in the match which got overshadowed by the number of storylines Dombrowski & Gargano talked about even if they all applied to the match. Score: +1.
 
They showed the replay of Jason Bane beating Bobby Beverly the week before in the Number One Contender’s Tournament As much as I picked on ROH last Monday, I’d be a real homer if I didn’t mention the fact that this replay went a little long. But it’s only replay #1.
 
Hobo Joe & Gregory Iron were doing exercises in trust. Iron wanted Joe to fall into his arms from a riser. Joe expressed that he was a little worried. Iron caught Joe. Iron said that was the first step in taking the Tag Team Titles from Sex Appeal.

Happy birthday, pro wrestlers! (May 28-June 4)

dirtballs

I imagine this is TNA's standard birthday cake design.

Happy birthday to one eccentric little moptop, one beer-drinkin’ son of a bitch, one homophobic hillbilly with terrible merchandise, and well, one super hot chick.

May 29: Brian Kendrick (Brian “Spanky” Kendrick, 31)

June 1: James Storm (JamesAllan Black, 33)

June 2: AJ Styles (Allen Jones, 32)
June 2: Velvet Sky (Jamie Szantyr, 29)

It’s a real TNA party! Yeeeeee haw! -Eric

velvet sky

Figured I'd better throw in a picture of a topless Velvet Sky for good measure. And for Web site hits.


Batista to tear every muscle, lose breath during MMA training

According to FightScoops.com, (recently departed?) WWE superstar Batista is training in mixed martial arts, possibly to enter MMA competition. Here’s a guy who can’t keep his balance when performing a simple powerbomb, something lanky lugs like Sid and Diesel could execute with ease. Here’s a guy who’s more waterlogged than a hydroelectric dam and more brittle than the peanut-laden snack of the same name. Here’s a guy who’s more asthmatic than an entire comic book convention, who blows up at the site of his opponent running around the ring. And he’s gonna try his hand at MMA? Please. He might be a 280-pound tattooed gorilla, but as soon as any skilled fighter gets Batista in the clutch, I promise you, it’s over. At least Batista’s aim is noble: Despite a complete lack of explanation in this video, I gather that part of the reason Batista is training to fight is to raise money for cancer awareness, a disease that has affected Batista’s “now ex-wife.” I‘m sure Melina will be thrilled to hear about this. -Eric

(P.S. I hope everyone else finds the misspellings in the above links as funny as I do.)

Hulk Hogan Is A Whiny Little Baby

From AOLnews.com:

Hulk Hogan is ready to rumble with Post Cereal.

The wrestling legend, whose real name is Terry Bollea, has filed a federal lawsuit against the cereal giant, alleging the company uses — and degrades — his likeness in a wrestling-themed Cocoa Cocoa Puffs commercial, the Tampa Tribune reports.

The ad features a bulky, blonde mustachioed wrestler named Hulk Boulder going to mat and handily beating Fred Flintstone and Barney Rubble — but losing to Barney’s brawny son, Bamm-Bamm.

In the lawsuit filed in federal court in Florida, Hogan claims Post uses his image without his permission and degrades him by showing him “humiliated and cracked into pieces with broken teeth, with the closing banner, ‘Little Pieces…BIG TASTE!'”

Hogan said he used the name Hulk Boulder early in his career before changing it at the suggestion of wrestling promoter Vince McMahon.

According to the Tribune, Hogan voiced his objections to the ad with Post in August, but said the company continued airing “Cocoa Smashdown” ads, which Hogan claims have harmed him with “unauthorized and degrading depictions.”

Hogan markets his own food products – the Hogan Energy drink and Hulkster Burgers, a line of microwaveable hamburgers, at Walmart.

Post has not commented publicly on the lawsuit.

With all the years of legal experience I have under my belt, I can safely say that Hogan has no case here. He is portrayed early in the commercial as the dominant world champion who really likes cocoa cereal. He isn’t made to look bad until Bamm Bamm starts shooting on him. Bamm Bamm, as such, violated the code of the locker room, and therefore he is the real villain in all of this. I plan on suing him for this immediately, or at least just as soon as I get back from the supermarket, where I need to buy some delicious Cocoa Pebbles. – Dusty

Mickie James Weekend Madness

It’s the exact middle of the weekend, and that can only mean one thing: Mickie James Weekend Madness!!!

Mickie James is pretty and beautiful.

Maybe she will go to TNA.

Maybe she will go to ROH.

Maybe she will return to WWE.

There is a 100 percent chance that illiterates are going to think that I somehow *am* Mickie James and respond to this post that they think “I” am hot.

There is a million billion percent chance that I am posting this to improve our views on this site. – Dusty

Scott Hall Drinks Alcohol, Hell Freezes Over

Hey uhhh.... ya got any gum?!

From the Observer site tonight:

Scott Hall was arrested last week on charges of disorderly intoxication and resisting arrest according to an article in today’s Orlando Sentinel.

The Seminole County Sheriff’s office was called at 1:43 a.m. late Thursday night, before the weekend Sacrifice PPV, with a call saying there was a disturbance at the Hitching Post Bar in Chuluota, FL, where Hall has been living for many years.

When a deputy arrived, he found a bartender telling Hall to please leave the bar, but Hall yelled and cursed at the bartender and other patrons according to the police report.  The report also said Hall appeared intoxicated, was slurring his speech and his eyes were bloodshot.

When Hall was told he was being placed in custody for intoxication, Hall resisted and swore at the officer, but the deputy managed to get handcuffs on him, although he used two handcuffs due to Hall’s size, and Hall was taken out in the patrol car.

The bartender told the deputy Hall was drinking heavily and became aggressive, pushed a customer, argued with a female bartender and called her names.  The bartender got Hall a ride home, but he punched the window of the car and shoved two women near the car.

Hall was told never to return to the bar.  When Hall was booked, he claimed he was unemployed.

Hahaha, working for TNA is the exact equivalent of being unemployed, so you can’t really say Scott was lying at all. As for the rest of the story, I don’t believe a word of it! – Dusty

EDIT: Now with realistic mug shot action~!

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