Stunt Granny Big 11- Week Ending 2/19/11

1. Eric Nelson – You ever sit back and ask yourself what the fuck happened to the people you know? Well this just happened. “Do you have band practice tonight?”  “Nope, dance lessons.” Of course, this is immediately followed by ridiculous amounts of ideas to publicly embarrass them so it works out just perfect. – Jeremy

2. Dolph Ziggler – Dolph made the stupid choice to go along and get booked in a firing angle on Smackdown. Why is this a stupid choice? Well, just about every time this angle is executed by WWE the wrestler goes bye bye. Sure this will probably lead to nothing, but the continuing trend of wrestlers allowing themselves the possibility of being unemployed needs to stop already. – Jeremy

3. Jerry Lawler – Jerry’s mom died this week at the age of 90. She reportedly had been diagnosed with and was suffering from Alzheimer’s.  In a rare moment of seriousness: what a shit disease. My aunt’s mother had dementia and her new storytelling abilities were at least fun. But Alzheimer’s just rapes you mentally. Its effect on everyone around them is devastating as well. Part of me wants WWE to cut him a break and give him the title Sunday. It won’t happen but it would be a nice gesture. Yeah, I am a dope. – Jeremy

4. Chris Jericho – His new book, “Undisputed,” was released to rave reviews (I’m picking it up this weekend and not sitting it down until I’m finished with it), but more importantly, he continued to cross the country to promote his book on the radio and in the meantime show everyone why he’s the smartest damned person in the wrestling business. He completely understands what it takes to get over, to stay over, and to get others over, and his self-awareness is second to none. Jericho is a character study in awesomeness. – Eric

5. The Rock – He cut an awesome promo for 20 minutes that didn’t feel like 20 minutes. I’m pumped that he’ll be involved at a Wrestlemania that I attend. He adds star power to a card that will feature the Miz (been around for a bit but is still getting his main event legs) and Alberto Del Rio (less than a year on WWE TV) in two main event matches. He even has a new shirt (and three retro shirts) that will sell like hot cakes. – Kevin

6. Jeff Hardy – Mr. Hardy got another continuance because one of his lawyers was sick (let’s hope he didn’t use any of his client’s medicine) and the local lawyer was needed to represent a murder suspect. The next hearing will be after Victory Road, which is where Hardy will drop the belt just in case he has to drop trow for Big Bubba. – Kevin

7. Rima Fakih – You may (totally not) know her as Miss USA, and you probably (but most likely didn’t really care that you) saw her as a guest host on Monday Night Raw. Oh, and she also loves to pole dance. But now you’ll know her for three important reasons: 1) She’s going to be on WWE Tough Enough, 2) She’s going to embarrass the fuck out of herself on WWE Tough Enough, and 3) She’s going to send at least 100 percent of the Stunt Granny crew into masturbatory fits. (P.S. You don’t wanna see Max pole dance, Kevin.) – Eric

8. Tough Enough – Speaking of Tough Enough, here’s some more shiz. It was recently reported that a bunch of noteworthy indy workers were rejected by casting for positions on this coming season of Tough Enough. Those names include Austin Aries, Joey Ryan, Mercedes Martinez and Brittney Savage. I know the internet community will be all up in arms about the Aries snub, but let’s face it – he’s too old and too short for WWE to give him serious consideration. I’m more surprised about Ryan, who has the size WWE likes and who has done some squashes for them in the past. – Dusty

Also, there was a wrestler who asked to not have his name mentioned who noted there was a frustration among the talents after dealing with the casting people. He apparently was led to believe he was going to be a part of the show, only to never hear back from the producers after the initial word. – Dusty

9. Vin Gerrard – That’s who the unnamed source was. No Source Dot Com, baby! – Dusty

10. Hernandez – Okay, check out this video first and then report right back:

It is a testament to how unprofessional and poorly run of a company TNA is that Hernandez was not immediately fired for that. I’m talking like during the match fired. What a total chump. He is 38 years old and has been wrestling since 1996, but apparently can’t be bothered to learn how to do his finishing maneuver properly. A special bonus to this is that he has the benefit of seeing Sheamus performing the move successfully every week on a television show that people actually bother to watch. Fuck Hernandez. – Dusty

11. Miguel Cabrera – Baseball season is right around the corner, so you’re going to have to get used to me talking about baseball. If you’re not down with baseball, you can kiss my a to the crooked letters. In any event, Jeremy’s boy Cabrera was recently caught with an obscenely high blood alcohol level, and was actually sipping on something while the officer was talking to him. That’s some Craig Ferguson shit, right there. In other news, the Oakland Athletics have a much better pitching staff than the Tigers. – Dusty

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