Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of Raw

Today's word is passion.

Sometimes, it’s hard to know yourself. I wasn’t sure how I wanted to formulate the beginning of this column but this route seems the best to me right now. My younger brother, who barely watches wrestling, thought it was a good thing to make a weekly column out of the Raw review that I do. Jeremy had told me the same thing before Wrestlemania 27 when I about gave out for the month before hand. My buddy Sean who I refer to often in this blog, said to me as we left the bar (I’m three deep on Great Lakes Dopplerock which is 7.6% alcohol just in case you were wondering) “You’re going to do your review now?” Yes, Yes I am. I think that wrestling is at a low tide but I don’t give a shit. I have a passion for this site to make it the best (Not reviewing a PWO show this  past weekend makes me feel like a failure in this department which I hope to make up for in the evenings coming.) whether it’s my reviews of PWO, t-shirts or this blog. When I bitched that I wanted comments, I suppose I don’t really care about them. I want people to enjoy this feature on the site. Let’s roll.

“Macho” tribute which I hope contributed to our great numbers over the week. God rest his soul. I’m so incredibly pissed at this point. I had a secondary intro about Demitri Martin telling people to “know themselves” because he is similar in age to Jim Norton. Both completely different comics but they know who they are and are both really funny. Anyway, that had something to do with me knowing my column. Since I feel like I can’t replicate my first viewing of the Truth/Cena/Hart segment, lets say they “executed” that well. Truth isn’t in Cena’s league but because of their past, which they acknowledged, it could work.

Big Show & Kane take on the other half of Nexus. Punk is killing on the head sets. No surprise that Show is holding court into commercial break.

By the way, improving this column hinges on me upgrading this shitty ass computer that has lost parts of at least 2 blogs now. I’m sure it has eaten parts of PWO reviews that I can’t remember. Nexus gets a win that is too expensive if you call it cheap. Better champs if well, you thought the tag team ranks were worth it.

I’m not surprised that Luke, Andy & Jeremiah are the final three without watching the last episode of Tough Enough. Randy Orton rocks according to some people.

Show bitches, Del Rio interrupts but gets hit by Rich Rod. I’m confused. Ridiculous to see Kane with “concern” on his face. What a strange segment.

They’re still on hurt Big Show. Swagger gets to act like a goof. Evan Bourne takes him on. Jeremy (again assumed) tweeted about this match.  Taking it he got killed. After watching it, I agree. Swagger needed that kind of win but it’s weird they’re doing this to Bourne who got a minor amount of revenge.  Cole gets the cold shoulder back stage.

Cole comes to the ring. Cole trying to suck people in, but the crowd isn’t buying it.  Why have the WWE’s two biggest heels been Cole & Vickie Guerrero? Not a single heel in that group. Miz taking some heat from Cole.  A-Ri gets blamed for many losses. Nice burden of proof against Riley. Good dick move by Miz. Kia licks my face during the Raw GM’s part. Riley defends himself with the “I quit” proof. Miz gets the beat down. I’m surprised Kia isn’t licking me still. For those that don’t know, Kia is my muttacular dog. Riley needs to capitalize on Smackdown now.

Eight Diva tag team match. Couldn’t be less interested in a match. I mean, I went crazy over Maryse’s Twitter photo (which of course wasn’t on so I enjoy her sight but the women mean jack. Kharma comes out quickly. What the hell is going on? This is why they bought Kong’s contract? To have her cry? Amused by the new Melina look since she went heel. That’s how the segment ends? Really? What shit.

Kofi and Drew have a Smackdown match on Raw. Derrick Rose and Kofi being compared? I’m insulted and I don’t watch the NBA until the playoffs. Cole as a toned down heel could really work. He’s shown me more as a heel than he ever did as a face. Less aggressive might help the people around him answer him without being irrational. Kofi’s leg gives out but Drew is still a bitch. Kofi SoSes Drew for the win. Drew is screwed. Dolph gets the US Title duties again. Good spot if they do something with it unlike normal.

They replay the Kane/Show and Del Rio/Rich Rod segment. Del Rio said Big Show needed to pay but it’s Rich Rod’s fault. Lawler pay tribute to Savage. Video package. After Jeremy and I argued about Wade Keller rating John Cena above Macho Man, I agreed with Jeremy that Savage passes the “parent’s test” which is that someone is more popular if our parents knew who they were. I agree that our parents know who Savage is but not Cena. Sad thing that just dawned on me though, if Cena sticks around we should be the parents who know who Cena is. Neither of us will have kids the right age to be that way, but age wise, we fit the profile.

I didn’t tape the over run and I just got another commercial after FFing through the intros. I’m not going to see the end because I didn’t tape over run.

I can’t believe Truth is even in line for a shot at Cena even if they make sense historically because of their friendship. Punk’s pink trunks makes me think of the bachelor party theme at ??Put-In-Bay is pink wife beaters. Last year, it was moustaches. Bachelor party weekends rock. Why did it take me until now to realize that Punk is doing another Macho Man tribute with his trunks and boots? He says he doesn’t want the cheers. As Jeremy said to me earlier today “He’s lying”. Cole is at perfect heeldom right now, more subdued but pointing out the face’s advantages. Love it. And I got all of Raw, basically.Really dug this blog even after skipping my real review of the opening segment. -Kevin

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