Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of Raw

Surprisingly, the caption in the picture doesn’t refer to having to watch Raw again. Or even a warning to you the reader about the quality of content. I always bring the quality. No, I’m referring to my buddy Sean stopping over in thirty minutes. The one that in the below post all but raped me during New Year’s Eve. I was going to be content to sit here and watch Raw and get to bed somewhat early. Now he’s going to fuck that plan up because I’m taping Raw and Hawaii Five O as usual. That means we need to head out to watch football, which I do want to catch. Plus, I want to know what the surprise is. Sorry Twitter folks, I might no be around for that. Let’s roll.

We get a recap from Kane’s speech last week. Then John Cena hits the ring. He gives us some New Year’s Resolutions. He is going to remain true to himself. Cena shows off his awful shirt. Kane gives him some advice over the PA system. Embrace the hate. We can only hope. Even Shawn Michaels embraced it a little bit in his feud with the Undertaker. We get the video one last time. I can’t wait for it not to pay off.

Daniel Bryan starts off against Cody Rhodes. I’m ready for my first dirty finish of the year. My money is on a Booker distraction leading to a Bryan win. Mitchell Cool pointing out Bryan’s losing streak before his title win shows why he should win clean tonight. Get this guy a little more credibility. Wow, Bryan does win clean. He did a good job on Smackdown. He’s getting the promo part of the wrestling business now. They recap the Truth on Miz beat down. Johnny Wooden GM talks to him. He plays good GM by pointing out the Miz’s flaw. Miz fights Sheamus again but he is protected from Truth.

I took 2012-1988 and got 24. How is it the 25th anniversary? Cool predicts 2012 as the year of Wade Barrett. Randy Orton is getting time off to fake his injury. Good for him. Barrett continues with his barrage. Santino interferes. Oh, it just his match opponent. Santino brags he spent more time in the Rumble. He looks more like Jeremy Piven every week. No one is surprised it’s a squash match. The Bellas get screen time to give Miz a hard time. Truth is stalking him. He wants us to stay quiet.

I missed between here and the 10 PM hour. From that point forward, I watched at the bar I went to without sound so I’ll do more of an autopsy like Dusty did since I’ll have sound when I watch tonight. If you want to catch my in time reaction, along with those of Jeremy, Eric and a very special guest Dan Keuster, go follow @Stuntgranny, @GrannyMaes and @difrango11. I’ll avoid the results too so that I can do the first half of the show like I normally would. -Kevin

So I’m going to watch some of this during halftime of the Sugar Bowl. What a snoozefest between Michigan (sorry Jer) and Virginia Tech. Nice of the WWE to miss the Miz attacking Sheamus. Another repeat match from Smackdown since nobody watches it. Miz flees the match. The Lil’ Jimmy act is not as funny when he’s a babyface. Miz walks into a Brogue Kick. Even worse that Truth gets transfixed by water bottles now. How dumb. Somethings are funny once but not multiple times.

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