Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Defintely Half Assed Review of #Raw

I'm going to miss hating West Virginia.

I had to watch the end of the basketball game of which there may only be one more. Pitt didn’t fair too well in the football game this year so it’s important to sweep the hoops. It’s helping to get the Panthers on track too. After an 0-7 start in the Big East, things have gone to three straight wins including one over #9 Georgetown on Saturday. They’re my only hope for a spot in the tournament. Kent State is not too fancy this year even if they did beat these same scum bags from WVU in Morgantown. Let’s roll.

I got the pay per view last night but didn’t start watching until the Funkasaurus showed up. I actually had a date and couldn’t preorder the Royal Rumble. Much like Eric, I didn’t admit that I watched wrestling. Unlike Eric, I’m not getting married in a couple of months and still hiding it. (Another note should be made, my HD feed only airs once as far as I know. The time slot was 8-11 so I couldn’t catch the earlier matches with the replay.) Jeremy predicted earlier today that the Undertaker would interrupt HHH’s evaluation of Johnny Wooden GM. I haven’t checked Twitter so I have no idea if Johnny Wooden GM starting the show off means that Trips shows up now. He seems like he’d deserve the main event. (There’s some sarcasm in that one.) Johnny announces the participants for the Elimination Chamber. Is it safe to say that Punk retains or Jericho wins? I think so. Johnny is going for the crowd pop mode for matches. CM Punk appears. Punk goes for his own version of cheap pop by chanting “Goodbye.” Punk going insider and making fun of Mitchell Cool by telling Johnny he’s a dork. Johnny gets me to track a smile by trying to shake with Punk. Daniel Bryan shows up after Punk says he’s the Best In The World. What a surreal start to Raw. Who would have thought these three would start a Raw? Bryan reminds me of Jericho bragging when he beat the Rock & Steve Austin in the same night. Oh, they’re going all in for Bryan to be a heel. Punk calls for the best match in the world. Sheamus shows up. It’ll be nice to get this announcement out of the way. I started to make this argument last night about Sheamus who evidently is considered a surprise winner last night. I’m not sure why. Him being left off of the card last year at Wrestlemania is irrelevant to me. He’s been getting as big a reaction as anyone these days except for CM Punk. No announcement, just a threat. Someone is losing their title in the mean time then. Maybe both of them.

Randy Orton comes out, in my opinion, to a smaller pop than Sheamus. I’m just saying. Wade Barrett has the Sky Box “rented”. Please admit a bit more you can’t sell out arenas any more. My boy Dolph Ziggler comes out with Vickie Guerrero. Huh, Barrett & Orton are going at it on Smackdown? Seems like a PPV match to me. No reason for them to be in the Smackdown Elmination Chamber. Or have them be in there to beat the hell out of each other and essentially eliminate each other.

Dolph gets another commercial length match. It’s just awkward that Barrett is talking the whole match. Why not just have him come down to the desk? Matthews & the box seem superfluous. JerryLawler makes my argument as soon as I’m done typed. It’s so he can stay away from Orton. Ziggler jobs clean after getting in a solid amount of offense and kicking out of some of Orton’s bigger moves.

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