World Wrestling Bracketainment: Best WWE Champion in history, play-in for No. 32 seed

Well folks, it’s that time of year. No, not when we eat fish every Friday because they’re the only animals on Noah’s Ark who don’t have any feelings. It’s bracket time! If it wasn’t for March Madness, we sports fans wouldn’t have anything to do at all.

So let’s drag this bracket concept kicking and screaming into professional wrestling! We’re looking to determine the best WWE Champion in history, and we want to do so with your help. We’ve seeded 31 of the 43 WWE Champions by the length of their combined title reigns (not including World Hvt Championship reigns, as that belt has been around for a cup of coffee compared to the prestigious WWE Championship). Through a series of polls, we’ll ask you to move these champions onto the next round until we’ve crowned a winner.

To keep things interesting, we’ve decided that, rather than plop Mankind directly into the No. 32 seed position automatically, we would have a play-in game to determine who longest-reigning champion Bruno Sammartino would face in his opening around match. Vote for your favorite, based on any criteria you wish! Once No. 32 is established, we’ll rock and roll, giving you about 48 hours to vote before moving onto the next round. Happy tournamenting!

Slow News Day Video: Marty Jannety vs Balls Mahoney

So there really is nothing going on today so far. In the effort to keep our fans entertained we have decided to provide you with some video entertainment. Well, not really entertaining, I mean it is but it is also pretty sad.  Well, I guess it isn’t sad if you enjoy watching two way past their prime, alright I know it is Balls but go with it, wrestlers performing in front of a captive audience. No really the doors were locked. They had to be. After all who in their right mind wants to pay to see this garbage?

Ok, let’s start over. Marty Jannety hits Balls Mahoney over the head with a chair. Balls then proceeds to win the match. After all this he then throws up. It isn’t very pretty but it is worth two minutes of your life. I guess. Unless you overestimate just how important your time is and if you read this and watched this video you proved it isn’t worth much. -Jeremy

WWE #Smackdown Spoilers – Cbus Edition

Smackdown spoilers. It's gross to show spoiled food.

So not to be a complete ass with spoilers, I will put Smackdown information below the Read More button. I do think that spoilers for NXT and Superstars is fair game in my estimation. I’ll post my Tweet (if you happen to not follow us @Stuntgranny) then any additional information that I can provide.

Tweet #1. – The parking lot isn’t much more crowded than last year’s #Smackdown I parked in spot 71 #GenoforHart (Post Show: So Geno is Evgeni “Geno” Malkin from the Pittsburgh Penguins. The guy was already my favorite Penguin. Then he decided to hoist the team on his surgically repaired knee and be the top scorer in the NHL. The Hart Trophy is for the best player in the league during the regular season. He’s the man.)

Tweet #2. – I go to my seat just for the beginning #NXT It’s a tag team special. (Post Show: the parking being more crowded did lead to extra people in the audience. Definitely not close to the 18,000+ in Cleveland for Raw.)

Tweet #3 & #4. – The Usos are taking on Darren Young & Titus O’Neil. The Usos won. They looked pretty sloppy themselves. Hm, wonder why they aren’t getting TV time? (Post show: I still dig the haka dance from the Usos but they were worse in the ring than Young & O’Neil. No surprise Tamina broke away from these losers.)

Tweet #5 & #6. – Percy Watson & Alex Riley are taking on Curt Hawkins & Tyler Rex. Who’s the coach in the 2nd group? Reks & Hawkins win after a top rope elbow by Curt. (Post Show: Not sure what to add to this match. Nothing happening for people who have been on the pay roll for a while.)

Tweet #7 & #9 – Derrick Bateman & hot blonde whose name I should remember because she hung with AJ will take on Johnny Curtis & some English chick. Maxine is Curtis’s woman. (Post Show: Thanks to @lecroy24fan who has a better memory, Kaitlyn is the blonde. Maxine was with Johnny Curtis. I should have noticed her too since I watched the Diva’s season of NXT before they went strictly online.)

Tweet #8 – McGillicuty & Tyson Kidd are feuding. Promos break down into a brawl. (Post show: No surprise these guys aren’t on either of the big shows either. I love Kidd’s in ring work but his promos still stink.)

Tweet #10 – I’m just to the camera left of the announcers in the 4th row. We’ll see if I get some TV time. (Post Show: They only taped two segments in my area. I tried to get on. I even pointed at my phone with the Stuntgranny.com home page up. I doubt I’ll be seen despite the proximity to the ring.)

Tweet #11 – Dude beside me thinks Maxine is a man’s name. He’s got to be brain power deficient. (Post Show: His buddy was on of those “Title Belt Guys”. Yikes. Plus, the dude wanted to blow and/or have sex with Santino. He also loved screwing with the five year old in front of us. His mom was pretty hot. anyway, it takes a lot for a twenty something year old to mess with a five year old’s mind.)

Tweet #12 & #13 – Bateman & Kaitlyn pick up a quick victory. Let’s just say Kaitlyn is mildly attractive live. @DustyGiebink I’ll pass along your new number (Post Show: The only person I saw tonight that was hotter than Kaitlyn was one of the waitress’s at Gallo’s. Smoking. The both of them. Sorry Dusty, I didn’t get a chance to pass along your number, or even my own.)

Tweet #14, 15 & 16 – Justin Gabriel is taking on for Hunico with his man servant Camacho. My Kashi Go Lean is wreaking havoc on my intestinal track. Maybe I should let a few rip to clear out my section. Hunico put a thumping on Gabriel. (Post Show: I wreaked havoc on my section later. No one seemed to care despite the fact that I grossed myself out a little bit. I didn;t think Hunico would win. I think both guys have the whole package. they just need someone to get behind them.)

Continue reading

%d bloggers like this: