Kevin’s Blog: #iMPACTWrestling – For The Hell of It

I’m tired but I’m going to start doing this review. I might not finish it before I sleep. I don’t care. It’ll get finished once the dogs take a nap later today. It’s 12:42 AM EST. Let’s roll.

We get a review of the Victory Road main event, Sting vs Bobby Roode. They showed film of Roode getting ready to attack Dixie Carter. Roode is hard to take seriously with dry hair. So I’m glad I didn’t pay for this pay per view. Roode duct taped Sting to the ropes. Oh, we’re going to still shoots now. Dixie attacked as Sting’s shield. Back to still shoots. Weird combo of review. Back to film. Don’t you have to fire a guy who is that insubordinate? I can’t attack my boss and keep my job. Dixie Carter comes out first. More disrespect is being tossed out by Bobby Roode. The crowd is right “Fire Bobby”. Sting comes out. He gives the old “not the right kind of revenge” speech. The crowd go sheep. For some reason, they go to commercial thinking this is a cliff hanger.

Sting is relinquishing his GM duties. He wants to be a wrestler. Not a GM. He’s got to rest because of his concussion. Sting’s got a man for the job. It’s Hulk Hogan. Sting tells her to trust him because he’s “real” now. I’m not dicking around with previews or ring entrances. Bully Ray is super freaking pissed. He’s going to take hostages out.

Zema Ion, Anthony Neese and Kid Kash take on Austin Aries for the X Division Title after a commercial break. Two weird breaks to start the show. They’re still protraying Aries as a heel. You wait for a baby face pop to bring you back. He will get some cheers. The match was fine until Bully Ray takes out everyone. He saves Aries for last. Good way to get his heat back. The Mexicans show back up and their car is being towed. They are questioned to win their car back. Anarquia can’t spell Guadalajara. I needed spell check. They are going to wait until after their match so that they can earn the money back. Stupid.

Rosita & Sarita are taking on ODB & Eric Young. Tazz admits that the wedding will have a hitch since all wrestling weddings do.Rosita tries to act tough to ODB. Sarita comes in to do the heavy lifting for the heels. Rosita comes back in for some reason. EY does cart wheels after the hot tag.  EY has pink trunks on. ODB goes jealous rage. She gets mad at EY but still kisses him. ODB shoves him onto Rosita for the pin. Weird.

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#WatchROH – Aired 17 & 24 March 2012

They showed Adam Cole pinning Davey Richards. Richards shakes Cole & Eddie Edward’s hands. Kyle O’Reilly refuses to shake. Kevin Steen is going to be Davey Richards personal nightmare until he gets a match against him for the ROH Title. Adam Cole comes out for March Mayhem Eight Man Tournament. Cole had a backstage promo. He’s mad at O’Reilly for not respecting him. He’s going to make O’Reilly respect him. Chris Silvio is his opponent. I’m ready for a squash match. Oh my lord, Kevin Kelly compares Silvio to Jesse Ventura & “Superstar” Billy Graham. I just vomited on my lap top. Kyle O’Reilly does his best to make the announce booth sound even worse. Cole wins a Florida Key which is a criss cross dragon suplex. Not an impressive outing. O’Reilly stormed out of the booth for storyline reasons but it should have been because it was a poorly executed match. O’Reilly challenges Cole to a match at Showdown in the Sun. Cole accepts.

They recap Jimmy Jacobs vs Kevin Steen. Hilarious that Jacobs is rehabbing from being evil in ROH & being evil in PWO. Kelly gets to interview Kevin Steen. He is carrying a tennis racket that has Davey Richards on it. Steen talks about destiny. He’s just as boring as Alberto Del Rio. He will be ROH Champion despite Jim Cornette‘s attempts to kept him away from the title.  Cornette shows up. Cornette tells him that his opponent for Friday night for Showdown in the Sun. El Generico is his opponent. Steen said he won’t be dumb enough to get himself suspended by using the pile driver.

Lance Storm cuts a promo from his gym. He said he isn’t out of shape and will be ready for him. He said Mike Bennett doesn’t have the passion to be in wrestling. They try to make the promo more interesting by shooting him from multiple camera angles. It doesn’t work. Davey Richards knows how tough his three man match will be against Eddie Edwards & Roderick Strong. If he wins that, he takes on Michael Elgin. Richards said if he gets out of that weekend with the title, he’ll have earned it. DemBoys said everyone in this match hates each other. The chicken shit is going to hit the fan in Florida. Charlie Haas tells the Briscoes that they’re dumb. It’s a grudge match so when this match is over, their feud is.

Evidently everyone pays in and wins a pot of money for the March Mayhem. Four matches lead to a four way match. Winner of the four way wins the cash. They love having money on everyone’s mind. We get replay of Jay Lethal versus Tomasso Ciampa. The match went to the time limit. Ciampa attacked Lethal and stole the TV belt. Roderick Strong with Truth Martini takes on Jay Lethal in the first four way match. Counting in English reminded Kevin Kelly of El Generico’s return. I think he’s locked up worst announcer in wrestling with tonight’s showing. Congratulations on unseating Mike Tenay’s several year reign. They go to commercial before much has happened.

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Stunt Granny Audio Show: WrestleMania 28 Hall of fame

WWE and pro wrestling history is left in the hands of Dusty Giebink, Dan Kuester and Eric Nelson as they discuss the 2012 WWE Hall of Fame inductees. The guys give brief bios of Edge, the Four Horsemen, Mike Tyson, Ron Simmons, Mil Mascaras and Yokozuna; debate any pros and cons to each entrant’s inclusion; and bring up Lex Luger far more often than anyone should. The title speaks for itself, but you’ll get a lovely trip down memory lane, so click to listen!

WrestleMania 28 Hall of Fame Show

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