TNA moves Impact Wrestling up an hour, now Devon’s kids can go to bed on time

Yep, the best part of the program that draws the highest ratings that they won't even be able to air in the new hour with all of the fans. (Credit to whoever posted this on Flickr)

According to Prowrestling.net, TNA has announced that Impact Wrestling will move from its current 9-11 p.m. Eastern time slot on Spike TV to an earlier 8-10 p.m. Eastern block, “predicated on the fact that there are more available viewers” during that earlier two hours. Yes, because at 10 p.m. Eastern, millions of people suddenly die and aren’t replaced until 11 p.m., and their TVs explode right there in the living rooms. No, there aren’t more available viewers at that time, and it’s not just TV industry jargon I don’t understand; it’s a fool’s explanation for a pussy move by a pussy company. Remember when TNA attempted the Monday Night Wars V2 in 2010, and within five months were back to Thursdays? The rationale, from TNA’s press release?

The fans have spoken and with their input we have determined the best timeslot to maximize the TNA audience is on Thursday nights where we are confident it will be among the most-watched shows with young men.

So at the time there were enough viewers to force an entire day shift, but now there are too few viewers there which warrants a time shift. I love it. TNA fans, set your VCRs accordingly!

For the record, here are shows TNA will now compete against in that 8-9 p.m. hour:

  • “Missing” (ABC, with puffy Ashley Judd)
  • “The Big Bang Theory” (CBS, as well as every other channel that has syndicated shows, so you can watch it any time)
  • “American Idol” (Fox; you don’t want to miss Steven Tyler’s face melting off)
  • “Community” and “30 Rock” (NBC, two of the most overrated shows of the past five years)
  • Basic cable reruns of “George Lopez,” “Two and a Half Men,” “American Pickers,” and “Real Housewives of New Jersey”
  • Highbrow, out-of-demographic news programs including “The O’Reilly Factor” and “Anderson Cooper 360” (or 180, if you ask Gorilla Monsoon)

If TNA can’t pull itself back up over the 1.0 mark against this cadre of pure shit, it needs to buy a huge novelty “OUT OF BUSINESS” sign and put itself out of its misery. -Eric

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