#TotalDivas – She Said (He Edited) Episode 5

whipped-cream-cartoonFamily. That’s what this episode brushed on this week as Nattie and TJ went to their home town (Kevin’s Edit: Of CALGARY…ALBERTA…CANADA) for a WWE episode. Not only were they in their hometown for WWE but it was Nattie’s birthday. I can’t even emphasize the annoyance of how many times Nattie reminded us it was her birthday, 15 maybe 20 times in a 45 minute show. It got to a point that I thought, enough already! (KE: That was about 14 minutes into the show. Shut up Nattie, we know.) We already know it’s your birthday. But the real kicker was TJ’s mom. Family. Some family is great to have around, other family, maybe not so much. I think what it really boils down to is that TJ’s family, in no way, likes Nattie and it definitely showed in this episode.

So the episode starts off with TJ’s mom calling to let them know she would like them to stay with her when they come to town. Nattie immediately says no. Apparently TJ’s mom has a tiny 1 bedroom house and a King Size bed. Nattie will have to sleep in the same bed with TJ’s mom since she doesn’t believe they should sleep together in her home since they aren’t married. I understand her house her rules, (as I follow the same rule when I go to Kevin’s parents) but sharing a bed w/TJ’s mom, totally not cool at all. (KE: At least you don’t have to sleep with my mom. You get your very own bed lady.) So they get the hotel room and as soon as they are there, TJ’s mom calls and he leaves Nattie at the hotel alone and goes to stay with his mom. OMG! I was floored. Can you say Momma’s boy! After last week’s episode w/this guy and this week’s, I don’t see why she doesn’t dump his sorry ass!

The whole trip Nattie informs us it’s her birthday and much to Nattie’s distaste, TJ never tells her until they are walking out the door of her hotel that they are spending time with his family. I LOVED her look when they went to lunch with TJ, his mom and sister. (Scary!) Anyway, his sister informed them they should see a pre-wedding counselor and when bringing up kids, TJ’s mom made it very clear, they didn’t need to talk about that. We find out that TJ’s mom has been making him hot chocolate with marshmallows, hello, is he 5? They have been spending a lot of time together because family is so important and she looks at Nattie. You can see how angry Nattie is getting and when she tries to quiet TJ, his mom perks up and says ‘don’t ever shush my boy’. (KE: I was at a loss for words. I would have jumped off the cruise ship if my mother and sister acted this way.)

Nattie ends up treating herself (I would too after that lunch) to a spray tan. Though I’m not a fan, she knows the guy that owns it. After a bit of definite flirtation, she leaves with her spray tan for her WWE performance where she loses. After that, TJ picked her up for her ‘special’ birthday dinner, because once again we are reminded it’s her birthday. (KE: I know you’re supposed to remind people of the situation but this was overkill central.) TJ informs her they are having a nice birthday dinner at his sisters. At this point Nattie is fuming mad and even though I don’t like her temper tantrums, I totally believe it was called for. She informs him she is not going to his sisters for dinner and will just stay in her hotel room. Which she did not, because in the next scene she is at dinner with the guy from the spray tan. (KE: He reminded me of a tall Mike Mondo. Or Heidenreich but not quite as ugly.)  He informs her that she is a princess and she should be treated like one and that she should dump TJ…leaving the spot open for him. I give kudos to the guy for saying this to her face. As for what her decision would be, it’s a possible cliff hanger, but we all know, 14 years of TJ, annoying as he is, would she ever think to leave him? Doubtful.

We move onto Brie and Nikki. Brie and Nikki’s Dad left them at the age of 15. You would think that he left them at the age of 2 the way Nikki tells the story. At age 15 you should be able to get through your Daddy issues. But I guess not. After a conversation from John, who once again must be reading from the Tao of Pooh, she decides to set up a meeting with her Dad and bring along Brie and their brother. Right when their dad shows up, Nikki says she wishes she was never there. Interesting, since she is the one that set up the reunion. After a boring display of feelings, everyone at the table decided that it takes time to heal a relationship. (KE: The father had a snappy fedora on. I’m not sure why I was surprised they had another sibling.)

Trinity and Ariane. Wow! These two were definitely better than the Brie and Nikki snore fest. Trinity and Ariane are besties (so they say). We find out in this episode that that really isn’t the case and when you have to women yelling over each other and doing the head shake it’s quite hilarious. Not to mention the ‘show’ they put on in public at an indoor race track where Ariane, Trinity, Eva Marie and Jojo go to enjoy their day off. It seemed all fun and games until Trinity started to get an attitude with Ariane since she always has to be the winner and the best and Trinity just couldn’t take it anymore. After giving a little push to Ariane from behind, the girls started to push and shove back until eventually it ended. My favorite part of this was Eva Marie and Jojo looking shocked and trying not to laugh hysterically at these two grown ‘besties’ having it out. (KE: The second best part was Eva & Jojo getting stuck in between them again at the event and having the same looks on their faces.)

Their issue continued at WWE Raw, where Trinity, Ariane and Stephanie McMahon all sat down and Stephanie gave them a little talking too and then gave them their singles match. I enjoyed Nattie’s take after Ariane told her that they sat with Stephanie..her expression was priceless when she said, oh that isn’t good. Ha ha. Trinity and Ariane both had their singles match. They both sucked and they both realized they wanted to be besties again. Awe! (KE: I can usually recall these matches they air but I’m guessing the singles Funkadactyls matches were on some program I don’t watch. They were both train wrecks.)

I’m once again trying to figure out what part Eva Marie and Jojo had, and after wracking my brain, it just hit me, they had a quick blurb at the beginning when they put on bronzer before going to the gym because according to Eva Marie, you never know who you may see. So after doing a 30 second plank…um even I can do a minute and I’m not training for WWE, they see Roman Reigns. They both go up and introduce themselves and all I can think of is, that guy is HUGE and all hilariousness that he has no idea who they are! As they walk away, Eva’s response is ‘And this is why you were bronzer to the gym’. Touche! (KE: What she forgot to mention was she was pissed at how much Eva like Roman aka Joe since she just got engaged.)

Apparently AJ Lee talked smack about the Diva show. Well, let’s think about this. It’s a WWE Total Divas reality show! It’s not supposed to be good. It’s not going to win an Emmy. It’s just here to fill another spot on E!. It’s another way for the WWE Universe to up their numbers and their sales. It’s mindless tv that people put on to fill background noise to fall asleep to, to just have on for background noise and  I’m sure guys watch it for boobs, or maybe people watch it just because they are curious. Whatever the reason, it’s still a ho hum show that we watch because it’s on. (KE: We need content for the site lady.) -M (& Kevin)

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