Jeremy’s One Paragraph Movie Review: Oblivion (2013)

WEK_Oblivion_0419Normally these reviews avoid spoilers but in talking about everything wrong with “Oblivion” it is near impossible. What an absolute let down.  The movie trailer was pretty much perfect. It didn’t give much away. It featured a lot of Tom Cruise and had plenty of mystery. Then you watching this garbage movie and realize the trailer was just as disjointed and confusing as this movie.  So aliens come to Earth and battle people and start mining the planet for power or something. It is incredibly obvious from the first scene that the humans did not win the war and the aliens are manipulating Tom Cruise and his companion. The timeline does not lend itself to the technological advances and as soon as you see the computer commander, you realize she is the bad guy.  But that isn’t enough. Tom Cruise has dreams of a different life even though his memories had been erased. They are of a strange woman and he proposes to her in a romantic fashion. So you get this added relationship and romantic entanglements that are totally unnecessary. Why are his memories erased? Who knows? As it turns out Tommy is actually a clone and everything he knows is not as he was told or something.  Wait, yes I did say he was a clone. Why? Your guess is as good as mine. The movie makes no sense and has zero drama. Morgan Freeman is there because he is Morgan Freeman and apparently Ernie Hudson’s voice wasn’t smooth enough.  What an absolute waste of two hours.  -Jeremy

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One Response

  1. **as soon as you see the computer commander, you realize she is the bad guy. This is because Melissa Leo talks with a 1960s southern accent, much like the Freebirds. The U.S. has national television, radio, movies, etc., and 99% of the country today speaks without much of any regional accent and in the flat “Great Basin Accent” which the rest of the world recognizes as “American” (without consciously putting it on, like Justin Timberlake does with his South Florida lazy tongue thing, or Steven Seagal (b. Fullerton, CA) does with his “N’Orleans” patois. Tom Cruise has made a deal with the Devil, he was 50 when he filmed this and looks 35. That Brit Ginger, Andrea Riseborough, has an amazing scene jumping into an airpool stark-raving birfdaysuited. A charming girl, I do see her in my dreams. And…wait for it…she is even sexier (as all girls are) when she is crying.

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