Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of WWE Raw

From themusicwithinus.com

From themusicwithinus.com

If you have ever been to this site, you know I put everything on hold when the Pittsburgh Penguins are in the Stanley Cup Playoffs so you are not surprised I’m starting this column late. Hockey is my favorite sport. This year, things are made interesting by the fact that they’re playing the Columbus Bluejackets, to which I have half season tickets. I thought I would be going to all home games but it turns out I’m only going to half so that at least allows me to finish this column in somewhat timely fashion. It also means I’m attending Game 4 on Wednesday so this game tonight was extra important. I feel much better about going to that game with a 2-1 game lead than being down one. I love Columbus, but that’s on hold until this series is over. Let’s Go Pens!

Brie Bella gets her in ring time with her husband Daniel Bryan, except Stephanie McMahon interrupts the fun. We get condescending Steph so it’s a good one. We’re supposed to be worried about the evil Kane being back though which needs more convincing from me. Kane from “out of nowhere” aka just where Bryan & Brie walked to. Bryan gets tombstoned by Kane as Steph shouts “No!” Kane sets up Bryan on the lower half of the stairs. Another tombstone. Is Bryan injured? (Next Day Note: No he isn’t. Unfortunately his father died. Man, that’s tough. You accomplish your dream, get married way above your looks only to have that happen. Yuck. Condolences to the Danielson family.) A third tombstone on the announce table still doesn’t sell me on Kane being able to beat Bryan. They’re trying at least.

If Bad News Barrett wins this match against Sheamus, then Cesaro loses against RVD later. These two have had some fun brawls in the past so I expect a good match. The cross body block is getting popular for the big guys to show off the agility. It never quite looks right and Sheamus is no different. Sheamus gets kicked off the apron to go to break. Sheamus takes over in this stretch. He does look much smoother doing the top rope shoulder block. Barrett turns it around with the Winds of Change side slam. Barrett misses the Bull Hammer Elbow. Sheamus turns it into White Noise. The cross body block to the floor looks rough. So much can go wrong when you do that. Bull Hammer Elbow as Sheamus goes for the suicide dive. Nice win for Barrett. I like Barrett more as an IC opponent than Cesaro, who seems destined for larger prizes. (Next Day Note: Of course I’m assuming that they won’t go baby face vs Big E who is also babyface. I don’t see RVD holding the IC Title though at this time in his career. They could use him as a stepping stone if they go that route though.)

Bray Wyatt and the Family are on the stage. We’re a nation full of sheep, lead by wolves and owned by pigs. It’s a wonderful night for change. Everyone is abandoning John Cena and coming to his side. We get a sing along. He ends by warning us to fear him. I dig his work.

I was amused by the set up for the El Torito vs Hornswoggle on Smackdown. They wrestled a real match as far as the sequence of moves went. The crowd could have cared less. El Torito is an impressive athlete considering his limitations. Jinder Mahal breaks up a pin. Drew McIntyre comes in to take on El Torito. Los Matadores hold up McIntyre for El Torito to sit on him from the top rope. El Torito then pinned him. “Evolution has always been the measuring stick” from Jerry “The King” Lawler. Is he going heel? He was just running down El Torito. I’m so confused. (Next Day Note: Lawler went back into baby face mode for the rest of the show which makes me even more confused.)

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@ImpactWrestling – Total Nonsense Analysis

Retro Never Dies by Jazzgin from Hongkiat.com

Retro Never Dies by Jazzgin from Hongkiat.com

I checked Prowrestling.net after coming back from a trip to Altoona for my nephews’ and sister’s birthday which got joined in by Easter. I noticed that the biggest news of the weekend may have been Jim Ross commenting on the possibility of Renee Young going to ESPN. I too like Ross believe that the rumor seems to be coming awful fast. She has enjoyed a quick rise in the WWE, but she still seems a bit fresh to be on ESPN’s radar. I won’t watch ESPN any more if she’s on there so she’ll be missed but I’m sure the WWE can pull someone in just as hot. Too bad they won’t be as competent.

Since that news wasn’t that big. I decided to keep going with the amusement that I found in Impact Wrestling this week. The Eric Young is Daniel Bryan recreation hit another level when Dixie Carter tried to rain on his parade (Cough, Authority, cough) but she is interrupted by Bully Ray who came out to endorse EY. Impact Wrestling evidently considers it to use Bully Ray, who is off to a poor start as a baby face, to mimic John Cena endorsing Bryan. The only problem other than Bully Ray’s overness problem, is that John Cena endorsed Daniel Bryan after he beat him on PPV. EY has not beaten Bully Ray in even on of those TV “PPVs” that Impact Wrestling hosts. Even if you consider Bully Ray’s heel turn a roaring success (I do), he’s not exactly on the level of John Cena. If Bully Ray starts saying he’s the measuring stick of Impact Wrestling, I’ll scream. They continue to miss the finer points of simple logic.

They weren’t done yet. Any of us with half of a brain said, EY just lost to Abyss about two weeks ago. So how else can Impact Wrestling prove that EY is credible? Let’s have him beat Abyss in a Monster’s Ball match. Yuck, stop trying to retroactively prove how good Eric Young is. We know you’re trying to make up for a terrible decision. The other thing that doesn’t help is that it was a gimmick match. The majority of EY’s matches over his entire career have been comedy or gimmick matches. If you want to convince me that EY is a true champion, show me that he can hold a good match. Daniel Bryan wrestled two non-gimmicked matches at Wrestlemania. Another point of logic that Impact Wrestling is missing. – Kevin

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