Stunt Granny Big 11 Week Ending 4/23/11

1. 1-2-3 Kid – The King of Trios tournament in Chikara Pro Wrestling has been the talk of the town, and Sean Waltman, aka 1-2-3 Kid, has been the talk of the talk of the town. Glad he got over his hepatitis long enough to wrestle, have some fun, entertain the nerds, Tweet about being in a wheelchair in the airport after the weekend, and still have time to plan an intervention for Scott Hall. – Eric

2. Scott Hall – I bet enough people remember Scott Hall that an NWO reunion on A&E’s “Intervention” would draw a decent rating. “Did you guys come here to watch… dogthebountyhunter? Or are you here for the hot mess we call the….” *crickets chirp* “One more for the good guys.” – Eric

3. Jay Lethal – Lethal was the latest new-generation wrestler released by TNA — on his god damn birthday, no less — because they have fuck-all for management and foresight. Maybe I’m in the minority, but if I had money to blow to start a wrestling company, Lethal would be a top-10 pick, for sure. He’s 25 years old, he’ll outgrow the Black Machismo costume, don’t worry. – Eric

4. Sin Cara & John Cena – Sin Cara got a big chant going for himself but John Cena killed it because the whole audience doesn’t like him. I’m not sure why the WWE continues to let Cena give “rubs” to people. Cena is a huge star, just don’t have him do this aspect of his job. The WWE should also note that some wrestlers can get over without speaking a word like Sin Cara. – Kevin

5. Johnny Gargano – He’s been a staple of Pro Wrestling Ohio but is now “out indefinitely”. In the mean time, he’s in EVOLVE and got big wins over Jon Davis and Chuck Taylor to become the wins leader in the league. He’s got a couple of big mentions on Twitter (@JohnnyGargano). It’s only a matter of time until TNA or the WWE comes calling but for the time being I hope to see him back in PWO since I can actually watch that show. – Kevin

6. Stacy Keibler – I saw her when she was on Chuck recently. Now she pops up on Tough Enough to help with the cheer squad routine. Many people wondered if Stacy was making her way back into the WWE. According to her interview on MayhemNightMayhem.com, she will not be coming back any time soon. Evidently because she has so much in the works according to her iMDB page. – Kevin

7. Matt Hardy – Matt Hardy claimed he had a broken arm after Lockdown. Turns out it was just strained from bench pressing forty-seven thirty-pound containers of Mint Chocolate Chip Double Fudge Ice Cream with deep fried pork rhines in to that gape he calls a mouth. -Jeremy

8. TNA Lockdown – What a perfect PPV. You put a bunch of older wrestlers you can’t fire for fear of paying off large sums of money, in a cage and let them do all sorts of dangerous moves in the hopes one of them hurts themselves so severely you can cut their ass for not being able to perform. Who says TNA has no heart? – Jeremy

9. Signs at wrestling shows – If I had any type of control whatsoever, I would ban signs completely from wrestling shows. I think they are ridiculous, unnecessary and a bother to people who just want to come to a show to actually watch the show, and not just look at the back of your idiotic sign all night. However, if you put a gun to my head and forced me to allow signs under a condition, I would make that condition for you to have to be able to spell properly. Please. – Dusty

10. Superstar Billy Graham – So the Superstar is all butthurt now because WWE decided to put Abdullah the Butcher into their total fake, completely arbitrary Hall of Fame because Abby is a garbage wrestler or something. Abby meanwhile is confused about all of this, justifiably so since he can probably still, to this day, main event any indy show in the world, and has helped Graham financially over the years as well. Lesson learned: the only words that come out of Graham’s mouth are nonsense words. – Dusty

11. The Ultimate Fighter 13 – Not necessarily wrestling related, but everyone reading this should be watching this season of TUF on the reg, if only to count how many times Brock Lesnar uses the phrase “turn chicken shit into chicken salad.” – Dusty

WrestleMania 27 Review: The WWE Hall Of Fame

So the Stunt Granny crew went to The Hall of Fame inductions in Atlanta. Turns out the event is actually a pretty good time and it flew by. Who got zero heat at the event? Who got the loudest pop of the evening? Is it possible to silence an entire audience without saying a word? Listen in to find out just why Abdullah The Butcher never uttered a word in his career. Find out why Brad Armstrong should have never uttered a word in his career. Find out how Triple H still manages to be a total d-bag yet humorous enough to endear himself to the Shawn Michaels-sympathetic crowd. Also, who sat next to who, who had hot wives, and so much more, just one click away!

WrestleMania 27- Hall of Fame

Stunt Granny Big 11 Week Ending 3/26/11

1. Abdullah the Butcher – I told a co-worker for the first time since I started here that I’m a pro wrestling fan. Of course he wanted to make sure I knew it was fake, but then he knowingly talked about wrestlers using pieces of razor blades to cut themselves during matches. I told him about Abdullah the Butcher and the scar tissue into which he can insert a quarter. I thought my co-worker was gonna puke. – Eric

2. The Miz – Let’s see how many times he ends up on the list this week. The Miz’s appearance on “Conan” was the stuff televisions were made for. Not too many people could verbally get the better of Conan O’Brien, but Miz unabashedly talked over the host, then gave him the nickname “Ginga Ninja” and the catchphrase, “Step into my dojo, mofo!” I really hope it sticks. – Eric

3. Bret Hart – The Hitman relieved himself of the old “HitmanBretShart” Twitter handle but kept up the juvenile, one-sided war of words with Hulk Hogan, particularly via Twitpic (or YFrog, or whatever, who cares), portraying Hogan as a withered-up old hanger-on, to the enjoyment of a few thousand smelly Internet nerds. Meanwhile, Hogan made a cameo on “American Idol,” still one of TV’s biggest rated shows. In other words, fuck you, Bret Hart. – Eric

4. TNA Impact – I swear I am trying to watch this show but damn they make it difficult. This is the exact train of events of trying to watch this week: I went to the DVR menu. I chose Impact. I fast forwarded thru the end of Gangland. I stopped when I saw Ken Anderson. I started getting annoyed at the opening. I fast forwarded until I saw a marker board in the ring. I got more annoyed. I shut it off after four minutes of viewing. I then got a text from Dusty. It wasn’t positive. How the hell were we watching at the same time when we are in different time zones anyway? – Jeremy

5. Michael Cole – Cole is the greatest heel in wrestling. He would make a great character in WWE comics. I mean he already has his own hideout in the Cole Mine as well as a loyal henchman. – Jeremy

6. Eddie Edwards – He won the Ring Of Honor title. He defeated Roderick Strong. Past champions in ROH include CM Punk, Samoa Joe and Homicide. We once met Homicide in Orlando, which is the home of Walt Disney World and Universal Studios.  We were trying to drunkenly speak with Cheerleader Melissa. She was a very nice person but her friend was annoyed. I bet if she knew who we were it would  have had a much more positive effect on her. By the way,  I used these names so I can tag them without a hint of guilt for hits for the site. – Jeremy

7. Kurt Angle – As Eric posted earlier today, Angle was arrested today in North Dakota when he couldn’t keep his car on the road. Police smelled alcohol on him and he was done for. Does TNA have the least professional locker room in wrestling history? There just seems to be no discipline or personal responsibility whatsoever there. – Dusty

8. Kurt Angle’s mugshot – It’s as if he’s simply taking a fan photo on a sunny afternoon.

9. Ian Rotten – Recently ethered into oblivion on some blog talk radio show by a 40 year old weirdo. I experienced this audio in the following way: The two idiots are yelling at each other. I am drowsy. I fall asleep. I wake up. The two idiots are still yelling at each other, now in harsher tone. Ian is basically every lowest common denominator wrestling fan ever, separated only by the fact that he actually got to run his own shows. So kudos for that. – Dusty

10. WWE’s partnership with Kmart – I guess WWE figures before all the Kmarts in the world are driven out of business by the existence of Walmart and the fact that they are crummy, dirty stores, they better form a partnership with them to promote their house shows. Soon enough, though, Ian Rotten will be hosting IWA MS shows on the parking lots of each and every one of these fine retail stores. – Dusty

11. TNA’s Spring Cleaning Sale – Don West is the fucking fucking man.

Dusty

Abdullah The Butcher Hall Of Fame Video

In case you were wondering just who got inducted this week; WWE finally got around to putting up the latest induction video. It is for Abdullah The Butcher. It contains no blood so I am not sure this is legit or not.  I was under the impression there was blood in every one of his matches at least five seconds in to them. Apparently I was wrong. Well,  I could be or WWE has done an amazing job of editing it all out.  So for those keeping track at home; Koko B Ware is in the WWE Hall of Fame as well as Abdullah The Butcher but the following people are not: -Jeremy

Randy Savage

The Ultimate Warrior

Psycho Sid

Big Van Vader

Owen Hart

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