Jeremy’s One Paragraph Movie Reviews: The Last Stand (2013)

The-Last-Stand-2013_1920x1080“The Last Stand” may be one of the worst marketed movies ever. If you caught the trailer the movie looked like a screwball action comedy and that couldn’t be further from the finished product. Johnny Knoxville is in the film but his part is so miniscule it boggles the mind why he was such a focus in the advertising. What you get with “The Last Stand” is a throwback to old Arnold Schwarzenegger movies such as Commando, Predator and The Running Man. It is full of violence, goofy tag lines and action. It was fun seeing old Arnold going back to what made him famous. The old man still has it and he knows how to carry an action flick even at his age. This was an absolutely enjoyable flick and well worth catching. -Jeremy

#ROH Is The Worst Part VII

arnold-schwarzenegger-intense

From upfitness.com

It absolutely drives me batty that Ring of Honor feels the need to push Roderick Strong as being in fantastic shape. When I punched fantastic shape into Google, that image above was the first one. Arnold may have been doing some stuff to his body to enhance it, but he was clearly doing some work to look that way. Over the course of the past year plus of watching ROH, Strong has been consistently defended by whatever announcer happened to behind the desk. Kevin Kelly leads the charge. In this episode, Nigel McGuinness touted his strength and endurance. I’ve changed to doing core and endurance training over the past five years. I have had a much easier time losing my stomach because of it. Which brings us back to Strong. Is he fat? Not even close but the guy has a bit of a gut. If he is in such fantastic shape, why does he have no muscle tone and a baby gut? It’s all to cover up for the fact that Roderick is clearly done being in shape. I Googled pictures of him and he had plenty of muscle tone in the past.

Roderick Strong is in an organization that reveres him or at least it seems that way with all of the announcers slobbering all over him. But they don’t see him suited to do anything. He’s not had his teeth sunk into a good story line in the same period of me watching. Sure, him and Michael Elgin temporarily feuded when the House of Truth broke up but they didn’t put much gusto behind it. I’d make an argument that Truth Martini’s break down got about as much attention. Which leads me to say, maybe I don’t blame Roderick for mailing it in and keeping his mediocre slot. ROH is the worst for turning their own celebrated wrestler into his own personal Ground Hog’s Day. -Kevin

Edit: After talking to my Prime Wrestling partner in crime Dan Kuester on ye olde Twitter, I realized I had forgotten an aspect of this hyping. Dan said “They aren’t going to say “Strong is kinda plain looking!” I don’t expect an announcer to undersell any of their wrestlers. The announcers do it so much though, I feel like they’re compensating for Strong’s lack of physique. If you mentioned it during one of his matches, fine. But they mention it multiple times in matches, this week included. Kevin Kelly & Nigel made comments before the commercial break then Nigel revisited the topic after the break. It’s too much. Knock it off or make Strong actually train. -Kevin

Stunt Granny Audio #190

A three (and a half) hour tour…

Join Kevin and Dusty through a magical odyssey of life and pro wrestling in this latest edition of Stunt Granny Audio! Kevin is planted firmly in the middle of a domestic dispute between one of his roommates and their baby momma. In classic Howard Stern fashion, Dusty drags it out on the air to entertain people. And then they focus their attentions on pro wres and the happenings of this week’s Monday Night Raw. Vince McMahon is the strangest human being in the entire world and desperately wants you to think he’s a stud who is hip and with it. What is greater: Vader’s age or Vader’s weight? Poor Sin Cara didn’t get his trampoline entrance. Poor Curt Hawkins didn’t even get an entrance. Can CM Punk shape the future of pro wres? All that and a whole lot more and it’s only going to cost you about 5o minutes of your measley life, so listen now dammit!

Stunt Granny Audio Show #190

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