More Crappy Programming!

I wonder if the contestants will be wearing these cups.

In news that induced a yawn from me and the rest of the WWE Universe, the reported the news that the Diva Search will take place during “regularly scheduled” WWE programming. Just another reason to tape their shows so that I can fast forward through these segments. The winner is irrelevant since they don’t get any more TV time than other contestants. It does mean that the current Divas are due for a couple of cuts that no one will miss since the Divas aren’t the focus of any show. The best thing about this show coming back on TV is the fact that we’re sure of getting a porno tape or at least some nudie pictures of the hot contestants. NSFW pictures below the jump. Or maybe they’re more like “It depends on where you work so I’ll save everyone some effort pictures” since I’m doing this on my lunch break.

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Attention Whore Update Part II

I know you missed me like my team on Survivor.

I know you missed me like my team on Survivor.

In the Tweet heard ’round the ‘net or just in Ashley Massaro’s tiny brain and audience, including to our source, we were supposed to know that she was going to return to the WWE by Summerslam.  From her Myspace page

“Now, as much as I’d love to say that it is true, it’s not. Because it ain’t me, folks. Like i’ve said I have no other [accounts] like that! I’m currently working on something that you will be able to view very shortly but I’m under contract and can not return to WWE just yet. So, hopefully it won’t be long. Last time I spoke with Johnny Ace [WWE vice president John Laurinaitis] he said to come down to a taping so I’m gonna do that asap.”

Her grammar skills wouldn’t get her a passing grade in her imaginary child’s first grade class. Hot damn. Anyway, thankfully we’re spared of having to see this twig with ginormous fake knockers for at least the foreseeable future. She’s tied up in something that she can’t talk about because Ashley is probably still trying to cut ties with her clients from the escort service. – Kevin

Attention Whore Update

I'm so skinny and can't afford clothing because I use all of my money for my imaginary baby.

I'm so skinny and can't afford clothing because I use all of my money for my imaginary baby.

Stunt Granny’s resident refuse girl, Ashley Massaro, is back at it again on her Myspace page (by way of making up all kinds of rumors for herself possibily participating in the 25 Diva Battle Royal at Wrestlemania.  Evidently one lunatic asked her this question, so that leads her to type “many of you are asking”.   No dummy, we don’t care and we’ll quickly forget about you until your next post.

Ashley was kind enough to devote four and a half sentences on Andrew “Test” Martin’s passing.  She ended with a gem of a statement “Let’s find a way to stop this madness”.  She already knows that “many of us” are looking to her for guidance on how to rid professional wrestling of “this madness” (also known as steroid and pain killer abuse) so why don’t you lead the way, you dumb broad.  – Kevin

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