Stunt Granny Audio #196

This week it’s a three man booth as Eric, Kevin and Dusty combine their resources to discuss the latest happenings in the world of professional wrestling. While Dusty was the only person on earth who enjoyed Booker T’s commentary, the trio all agree that it is for the best for him to move on to being the general manager on Smackdown. They also talk about just how bad ROH is lately, with their unique brand of fat guys in t-shirts wrestling for belts that mean nothing, and Jim Cornette seemingly losing the magic touch by the day. They also turn their attention to TNA, and agree that it has largely been actually good lately, with one glaring, crack addled elephant in the room preventing perfection. All this and so much more, so spare an hour of your life, because while you probably *will* regret it, they want you to and have mob connections, so you’ll be forced to eventually anyway.

Stunt Granny Audio Show #196

Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live & Definitely Half Assed Review of @WWE #Raw

My girlfriend’s present for her birthday was to not watch wrestling tonight. We had a great time eating dinner at Betty’s and then grabbing ice cream at Jeni’s. It’s put me behind the eight ball especially since I was a dumb ass and didn’t pawn this column off on someone else. Because it’s still the most important show in wrestling, despite it’s consistently poor quality, I think we need to cover it. 3 hours and 5 minutes of fun to come starting at midnight. Good thing I pulled a lot of all nighters when I was in Architecture School at Kent State. Let’s roll.

AJ Lee comes out and announces some big matches for the show. I’m plowing thru this episode so entrances are so getting the FF button. CM Punk interrupts her after the first FF of the night. Punk tries to weasel out of the triple threat match but it doesn’t work. John Cena hasn’t been in an opening segment in weeks so he comes out. I just noticed Punk went to the Lemmy look. It works better for HHH. I like recitation of facts. (Sarcasm central). Cena saying the champ doesn’t win in triple threat matches is the biggest gaffe of them all. Then of course Punk feeds AJ for his match of the night so we can close this segment out. Our choices suck. Thanks for showing up Big Show.

Shock of all shocks, Rey Mysterio won the vote. The popular guy won! (I’m getting the feeling this column will be sarcasm heavy. Maybe I’ll stop pointing it out.) Another surprise, nothing happens in the match before the commercial break. I do like the way these guys work together though. Hell of a feud. Oh my lord Lawler, Mitchell Cool makes a ludicrous statement about AJ Lee taking out her wrath on Punk and you sit there like a lump on a log then agree with him, sort of. Disagree with him for fucks sake. Point out that CM Punk interfered in the match to determine the number one contender. It’s not hard. Punk wins with the GTS. Nice. The WWE did pick good opponents for everyone except Big Show. Orton can’t lose this early in his return. Ricardo Rodriguez outshines Alberto Del Rio again. Too bad he can’t wrestle. Or isn’t in shape.

I’m digging the Fight Club remake of Wade Barrett. Fits into his previous stories too. Why is every wrestler dumber than a box of rocks these days? Alberto gets himself in trouble and booked for a match.

Christian gets to job to Alberto. Nice touch of having Del Rio dress and tape on the way to the ring. Sheamus has a head injury. Lawler is even mailing it in with his friends. No personal congratulations for Booker T yet. Sent him a text at least. Ricardo distracts the ref, Alberto nails Christian with the boot for the win. Ricardo left the keys for Sheamus to steal the car. I can’t wait for the visit around San Antonio. (Last hint of sarcasm.) Ha.

Big Show against Randy Orton kicks off the 9 o’clock segment. So, what’s the old mid-main event? Or is the Cena match in that slot with an unknown main event? Stay tuned for too long. Double count out. Just like any decent fan would have expected. Big Show misses the WMD which allows the Viper to strike. Yep, I see that guy winning the title at the next pay per view. (I fucking told you no more hints.)

Continue reading

Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live & Definitely Half Assed Review of @WWE #Raw

The mighty Kent State Golden Flashes have beaten the #1 ranked Florida Gators to bounce them from the College World Series. I didn’t think I could feel better than last week after the win in Eugene but I do. I didn’t like our chances today but the bats came alive and Ryan Borges pitched just well enough to eek out a 5-4 win, no thanks to the bull pen that couldn’t throw a strike. They probably won’t win the title, but it feels good to get a win especially over the Gators. Time for wrestling. Let’s roll.

Only five more weeks before I gauge my eyes out with three hour Raw on a weekly basis. I thought the Cyndi Lauper rumor, was just, you know, a rumor. Mick Foley comes out with a suit on. Why does it take so long for this moronic board to pick someone? He announces a dull tag team match with Kane & Daniel Bryan against Sheamus & CM Punk. Johnny Wooden GM comes out for his farewell address. Oh no, it isn’t his farewell address. Sheamus comes out next. Ah, and CM Punk. Good timing for them.

Kane & Daniel Bryan make their entrances after the break and of course a replay of AJ jumping into Kane’s arms. 211 days for a title reign for Punk. It doesn’t seem like it since Cena is in the majority of PPV. After helping my neighbor who locked herself out of her condo, I’m back to watching this match. Nights rarely run smoothly around here. Of all days that I’d want Baby Momma Drama to not be around, it’d be today so of course he is here. Heels winning at the break. No shock.

Sheamus comes in on the hot tag. He uses his power even against Kane. Bryan gets in the unseen drop kick. Sheamus gets the second round of selling. Even the none wrestling fans notice the quality of Punk and Bryan in the ring. AJ comes out, skips around in a mini-Kane outfit then leaves. Brogue Kick for the win.

Jack Swagger and Dolph Ziggler are arguing with each other. Vickie wants them to make peace. Johnny & David Otunga are bagging on Mick Foley when Big Show arrives. Big Show angry. Otunga needs the suit or dress shirt on to be drinking out of the coffee cup. Ziggler is taking on Swagger for Vickie’s heart. Missed that part earlier.

Swagger barely gets his entrance after the commercial. Dolph is going to get in trouble for the Flair strut. Swagger attacks Dolph’s “injury”.  Ziggler pulls out a very baby face win. We’re not sure what Vickie is wearing. It’s a poncho with short shorts with a napkin design. It is not working. We get a replay of HHH’s challenge. Limo arrives so time for a commercial to make us anticipate absolutely nothing.

Continue reading

%d bloggers like this: