Stunt Granny Audio: OHPA 7

Ken and Kevin are back again after a week off because of Kevin’s travel schedule. They are here to celebrate episode seven with number seven from the Steelers, Ben Roethlisberger. Is he a guest? Of course not, we can’t get anyone that famous. Big Ben was at Pirates game shagging flys and hitting batting practice. For the second straight show, Ken tortures Kevin with memories of Idiot Intern. This time the subject matter is marbles. How much should one invest in marbles according to Idiot Intern? Is this art work by Mike Gong even comparable to what Idiot Intern collected? Is there any redeeming value to regular marbles after seeing what this gentleman can do with them? Ken & Kevin stay in the world of art by talking about a photographer putting together Gifs buildings that he has photographed. Where is the original building? Why do the guys talk about the link after talking about the art? Good thing they can link it in this write up before this miscue ever hits their ears. They move on to celebrate the start of the World Cup by talking about the videos of soccer trick shot artist Remi Gaillard.  Don’t worry, here’s the link to the Deadspin story since they repeated the same mistake immediately after the first one. How good is this guy? Are the long distance shots more impressive? How about the ones that require English? Why did Ken not watch the video below the original? Are those ones more believable? How much of a dick can Remi be? How many buildings can Kevin list from the video in Paris? They wrap up their show with their third bit of sports talk, Bad British Hockey Commentary from @amhrichardson. What parts are funny? Which ones aren’t so good? Can you hear the clip of the Bad British NFL Commentary through Kevin’s lap top? Last but not least, what’s the #SippyTimeBeer of the week? Find out when you click on the link below!

The Pittsburgh Penguins Dilemma

Poker chips, large sum conceptJeremy thought this topic would be more interesting than another ROH bashing. I’m not sure his level of surprise when he IMed me this article from Deadspin but he did get me riled up enough to do this article. Here’s my take on their questions.

As I noted back on March 28th, the Pittsburgh Penguins decided to go all in during the trade deadline. I hoped they wouldn’t go bust but here they are. My beloved Penguins went down in flames in four short games in the Eastern Conference Final to the unheralded Boston Bruins. They scored a measly two goals in four games. Two goals might not even allow you to win a game much less a series. I’m going to break this down into a couple of categories for what happened and what needs to be addressed.

The Games

One pivotal moment came in the Penguins first round series against the New York Islanders. Marc-Andre Fleury has been the franchise goaltender since being picked with the number one overall in 2003. He started at the NHL level for a majority of that time. The guy even backed the team that went to back to back Stanley Cup Finals in ’08 and ’09 and winning the later of the two match ups against the Detroit Red Wings. Fleury wrapped up the Stanley Cup victory with a diving save on Niklas Lidstrom. In those years, he had a save percentages of 93.3% and 90.8%.  For those that don’t watch hockey, anything below 90% is bad. Ever since that save though, he has fallen apart in the playoffs starting with a terrible showing when they played Montreal in ’10. He had a save percentage of 89.1%. The hope of playoff success was low in 2011 because Evgeni Malkin had blown his ACL and Sidney Crosby was sitting with a concussion. Fleury could have stolen a series against the lowly Tampa Bay Lighting but he posted an 89.9% and the Penguins got booted in the first round. Last year is when things went to hell in a hand basket. Both the Philadelphia Flyers and Penguins decided that playing defense was no fun so they turned the playoffs into an All Star game by potting goals at a ridiculous pace. Fleury gave up 4.33 goals a game for a 83.4% save percentage. He couldn’t even stop basic shots and when the defense is that bad you need that to happen.

He rebounded from the terrible offseason (I’m going to skip over that whole lock out thing because it isn’t relevant to this discussion) and helped to lead the Penguins to a first place finish in the Eastern Conference. The problems looked resolved with a first game shut out of the Islanders. Unfortunately, he gave up four goals in the next three consecutive games. Fleury’s stats aren’t online now but you can’t win many games giving away four goal. The Penguins did pull out one of the three games. Former starter Tomas Vokoun played Game 5 and never looked back. Vokoun had one bad game though and it was Game 2 against the Boston Bruins. The Pens went down 3-0 in the first period. Dan Bylsma, the Pen’s coach, decided to pull Vokoun and send Fluery back in for the first time in a round and a half. Pens Center Brandon Sutter came streaking down the right wing and sniped a shoot over Tuuka Rask’s shoulder to make it 3-1 with a minute left in the first. Brad Marchand, who scored a goal earlier, came down less than thirty seconds later and floats a goal over Fleury’s glove hand which broke the Pens back. All Fleury had to do was make a damn save on a wrister from about the middle of the circles and the Pens have momentum going into the second period.  The guy let’s a floater go over his glove hand? Christ on a pony.

Game 3 in Boston had a bad moment too. The Pens needed a win. Despite playing well, they played their way into overtime knotted 1-1. The referees called three penalties in the first overtime. Mike “Doc” Emrick, NBCSports play by play man, noted with each penalty how long it had been since that number of penalties had been called in a playoff overtime game. Evgeni Malkin got the third while tired and trying to flip a puck up over the defense of Boston for a streaking, fresh Sidney Crosby. It went over the glass half a rink away. The Pens finished the first OT with some penalty time to kill still in the next OT. They killed the penalty. Later in the period, Malkin steals the puck from Jaromir Jagr, an ex-Penguin, who then clearly hooks Malkin to regain the puck. The Pens didn’t have time to recover as Jagr dished it to Marchand who scored the game winner. Former referee Kelly Fraser was asked whether this call should have been a penalty and he ripped the referees for not calling the penalty. Even my room mate Baby Momma Drama, who was born and raised in Boston, had to admit upon seeing a replay that Jagr committed a penalty. None of that matter though because the referees on ice didn’t call it. The Bruins are up 3-0 and pretty much all hope is gone.

The Coach

Dan Bylsma has been under fire at various points in his tenure in Pittsburgh because he’s at the helm of a team that boasts two of the most talented players in the world, Crosby & Malkin. He won a Stanley Cup after Michel Therrien had been fired in February or March of ’09. From what I’ve read, he has had some innovative strategies that he’s brought into the NHL as far as puck retrieval, especially for defensemen, go.  Ever since then, it seems other coaches have adjusted to his strategies. Last year’s debacle against the Flyers landed Bylsma on the hot seat. Crosby wasn’t playing well against Claude Giroux so instead of getting away from that match up at home when they have the last change, he stuck with it. Malkin was getting frustrated by Sean Courturier but he stuck by that match up too. Jordan Staal, the defensive specialist amongst their elite centers, sat by twiddling his thumbs. It may have been for the “better” considering that the Pens penalty killing, number one during the regular season, which was anchored by Staal was stinking out the joint too. Did Bylsma change strategies on the PK? Nope.

Continue reading

Penguins Trade For Jarome Iginla; Blow Up NHL Trade Deadline Day

Jarome Iginla Signed Cup

I’m still trying to process the news I read when I rolled out of bed: Jarome Iginla traded to the Pittsburgh Penguins from the Pensblog. I had written the Penguins off from getting Iginla after trading for Brenden Morrow on Sunday. GM Ray Shero then decided to beef up the defense by adding Douglas Murray. I was content that they had addressed some pressing needs even though the team had won thirteen straight already. Don’t forget that a majority of this winning streak (the last eight games) has taken place without Evgeni Malkin in the line up. He only has two scoring titles, one Hart Trophy & one Conn Smythe on his shelf. Kris Letang, their best defenseman, had been on the shelf for the prior three games before breaking a toe on Tuesday which will again keep him out of the line up. Ray Shero decided to out do himself though and make the April 3rd Trade Deadline column Jeremy & I planned moot. Both big pieces of trade bait this year, Morrow & Iginla, are both with the Penguins now. The Penguins have decided they’re going all in this year before the salary cap shrinks next year because of the new CBA. One would think they’d give up elite prospects to grab the big catch of the trade deadline but they only gave up Kenny Augustino, a 5th round pick playing at Yale, Ben Hanowski, a 3rd round pick who plays for St. Cloud State, and their first round draft pick. Ray Shero wasn’t even generous enough to include a bag of pucks in the deal. I’ve got no idea how Jay Feaster has a job as a GM after giving up a franchise icon for next to nothing. That first round pick better be a home run. Meanwhile, anything less than a Stanley Cup is a bust for the Penguins this year. That’s a lot of weight to carry. I’ll hope this “All In” strategy doesn’t back fire. -Kevin

Stunt Granny Audio Show #146

Kevin's Canucks Jersey! No joke.

Yep that’s right it is The Stunt Granny Audio Show comin at ya. Kevin and Jeremy talk some wrestling for ya so you don’t have to do your own thinking. They talk about the Zack Ryder snub from this past Monday. Zack may have come out the better for not being on the show. Why? Well listen. They also talk about the emergence of R-Truth.  They give props where they are due but wonder when he is going to run out of steam. They round out the show with a rundown of the Capital Punishment PPV before talking about Roberto Luongo’s horrible hair. SO check it out. You have to have an hour to kill.

Stunt Granny Audio Show #146

Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of Raw

I used this picture a while back. It's back because the Bruins are mauling the Canucks right now.

As is the case when the Stanley Cup Finals roll around, I have split attention during Raw. I’ll probably post the opening segment in between the first and second period then another segment during the next intermission. The only way I get out of this cycle is if Sean leaves. He’s from Boston. Wouldn’t you still keep watching this blowout (4-0) if you were on the ass kicking end?

The Miz is back to looking dapper. Miz cracking wise about Weiner. Miz having a good point about the Attitude Era stars but you aren’t drawing. Neither is Cena. Or at least not well enough. Stone Cold coming out. Man, they are dragging out the All Stars. Piper’s Pit with Miz & Riley. Why does the Miz have on sneakers though? Man, stay classy Miz. They are really trying to prop up the heels by having them go one on one with Stone Cold. They got no one to put people over than those retired. Pretty pathetic. Del Rio gets to beat Kane. Good for him.

The action got kicked off after a commercial.  Cole & Lawler bickering about Del Rio and Big Show’s auto damage is more interesting than this match. Not good news. Thank goodness Kane broke the hold, ahh, sneaky heel wants to break the elbow. Big Show makes the save but Kane backs him off. What is happening to Kane? He’s getting soft in his old age. No big surprise that Big Show and Del Rio are added to Capitol Punishment.

Sin Cara still gets the big entrance even though he’s the worst wrestler in the ring. Bryan comes in to sell because Zeke cant take the beating. Rhodes & DiBiase makes the save but get tossed. Sin Cara gets a cheap victory. I’m arguing with Sean about flashy moves between John Morrison and Sin Cara. He’s been over here too many weeks now. He kn0ws something about wrestling.

Hornswoggle is waiting for R Truth. Hilarious.  Truth better get shot in the nuts. He gets hit but Truth goes for the midget attack. Midget kick in the face. Well played Truth. John Morrison is the way Austin makes things right. Isn’t it a little early to blow this wad? Another midget kicking.

Santino gets to job to Sheamus. Awesome, a “We want Ryder” chant. Sheamus breaks out a Sharpshooter of sorts. Cool. Lawler corrects me and calls it a Cloverleaf.

Continue reading

Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of Raw

Vince McMahon did not look this good in the same colored suit.

So, I’m surprised this drawn out Tough Enough Finale got me sucked in as much as it did. It was completely bogus because they didn’t even show the entire match with Bill DeMott. They were too worried about doing live shots from Raw. Of course my DVR skips 10 seconds while flipping programs from Tough Enough to Raw. I missed what Vince did. How great is it to eat a Stunner on your TV debut? I’d say very. Cole amping up the excitement of the choice was too much. I liked Andy more but he still has work to do to get his personality out. What the hell is R-Truth doing? He gets to explain the outfit. Biggest moment of R Truth’s career being in front of McMahon & Stone Cold. R Truth using history against the crowd. A bit more creative than trashing their sports team. Truth is seceding from the WWE until his Title match. Vince makes it a comedy bit. Miz interrupts. I take a break to see that Boston has taken a 3-0 lead. Maybe they decided getting a winning instead of revenge was a better way to go about things. Don’t worry about the cheap shots. Win games. As I type that, Boston makes it 4-0 so I’m going to stick to reviewing for a while. I think Miz needed to go with lighter pants. the dark purple is too close to black. Alex Riley gets to share the spot light. Not really, Cena hits the ring. Vince made it a comedy, Cena’s going to make it not so funny. He was doing fine until making fun of R Truth. Vince gets to tell Cole to shut up. Another stamp of approval. You’re paying Austin, may as well use him.

Santino takes on McGillicutty. Cole tells me he’s half of the tag champs. Honestly, I had completely forgotten. Vlad looks really strange in blue, with an American flag. Longest Santino match, probably ever. At least on TV.  The crowd is eating up Santino’s offense. Santino gets a big pop for the cobra victory. What is a women’s match starting without a commercial break? I got it now.

The crowd is surprisingly into this match. Beth doing a good job of feeding them.  Rebuilding Phoenix needs to be done before Kharma comes back. Nice showing for Beth.

Booker talks to Trish. He has a secret, a Trisharooni. Swagger needs to be introduced by Trish. Booker giving Swagger a clinic in the promo. Punk goes Indian Style on the stage. He gives Swagger a clinic in promos too and he had less time.

Continue reading

Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of Impact Wrestling

Since I couldn't organzie our crew, I'm imposing self torture.

I started asking too late in the week who was busy what night. So my self torture involves reviewing Impact Wrestling. It’s this or watch the NBA Finals. I’ll check in on it but who cares. I’m an NHL guy. Ryan Kesler made a hell of a play to set up the game winner for the Canucks last night. I got to watch him at Ohio State and now he’s the best US born player in the NHL. Complete silliness that I need to wait until Saturday to watch another game.  In other positive news, Sidney Crosby was cleared for his summer work out. My Penguins will be back next season. On to the inevitable.

Bischoff starts off by telling a guy in a suit he doesn’t do autographs. I’m ready to poke my eyes out already. We blend right into a brawl between ODB, Velvet Sky & Lee South. Could they involve more useless behind the scenes people? ODB fails to break the table when she slams her on a table. I was fast forwarding but it was amusing to see Velvet Sky cover up while she wore a bikini. Dumb broad. Tessmacher is thrown into the skit for no reason. In the middle of previews, we get Mr. Anderson doing the Sting imitation. This company can not get enough of imitations. He’s taking on someone from Sting’s past. I can’t wait for the swerve. Kendrick asks for another match against Abyss. Bischoff tells him to fight Kazarian. For some reason Kendrick is involved. You don’t get a shot at the title whether you win or lose dummy.

More Bischoff from “during the break”  and in the ring. Roode doing the smart thing and not handing over the Tag Titles. Alex Shelley comes out to a luke warm welcome after a long abscence. Sabin torn his ACL & MCL so he’s out for a year. Shelley is teaming with Storm at the PPV. Yeah?

Crimson (not the PWO variety) takes on “Cold Blooded” Matt Hardy. I’m glad Hardy got rid of the braids but his look is exactly the same as in WWE. The pants are the same design he used for ages with different material. Why is Hardy calling for the Twist of Hate? That’s a face move. Sky High does it for Crimson. Hardy wrestled the same match he did in the WWE too. If they were holding you back, why aren’t you showing them what they missed out on? Joe gets speared when he tries to charge the ring.

Continue reading

%d bloggers like this: