Class Is In Session: #NXT Review – Takeover

From artfire.com

From artfire.com

The show began with an excellent pre-show hype special hosted by Renee Young, Paul Heyman, and Christian. Christian was just kind of there but the chemistry between Renee and Paul was just off the page. These two have the potential to be the next Heenan/Okerlund if not the next Heenan/Monsoon (the highest level imaginable). Paul was definitely the star of the show as his analysis was spot on especially when establishing the stakes for Tyson Kidd in the main event. The pre-show in general was a hit and the pure sports feel was a welcome change to the clown show that is the Raw pre-show. If you a planning on watching Takeover on demand this week, do not skip over the pre-show as it is required viewing. (Kevin’s Edit: We might be known for publishing material late. This review is no different. We’ll be gunning for a more on time report, hopefully free of computer problems.)

As the pre-show was ending, viewers were treated to the arrival of Adam Rose and his entourage on the Experience bus. They danced their way into the building as the pre-show faded to black.

NXT Takeover began with an excellent historical video package and then went to Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, and William Regal on commentary as Adam Rose and his entourage danced all the way into the arena for our opening match…

Adam Rose vs. Camacho

Rose was back at home at Full Sail University so he was mega over. Camacho has improved but considering how low he began, he still has a long way to go before even being slightly above average in the ring. The match was average at best but the crowd was totally into Rose as their returning cult hero so it was never boring. Rose won a short match with a cravat DDT he calls the Party Foul.

A video feature on Sami Zayn then aired where he spoke of his journey and the importance of his match. Good stuff again.

The Ascension vs. Kalisto (Samuray Del Sol) and El Local (Ricardo Rodriguez) (NXT Tag Team Championship)

This was a short match completely designed to show off the Ascension’s power moves and they were in there with the perfect opponents to do so. Kalisto and Local got very little so I do not know if they have a future together as a team after this. Local still has a bit of a gut on him so his moves were not as fluid as they should have been but the match was not about his team. The Ascension won with the Fall of Man high-low maneuver on Local.

Another very good video feature aired, this time on Tyler Breeze, who tried to get himself over as more than just a pretty face.

Sami Zayn vs. Tyler Breeze

Best match on the show to this point by far. Sami was his usual great self and Breeze kept right up with him to create an exciting back-and-forth match with a lot of moves. There was argument from some pundits (cough Jeremy Maes cough) over whether they did too much in fact. I don’t agree as I believe a lot of leeway should be given to a spotlight match that is designed to get over the next top contender to the Heavyweight Championship. The only spot that was borderline too much was a suplex into a powerbomb from Zayn that got only a 2 count. If they had traded big spots for another 5 minutes then it would have been too much but from there they went right to the finishing sequence which was Zayn attempting his running boot in the corner and Breeze putting his arm up in such a manor that he “accidentally” crotched Zayn. While Zayn was doubled over, Breeze hit him with The Beauty Shot which is a spin kick that I can see the argument for being weak finish to a high impact match. Great match.

Next, Lana and Alexander Rusev came to the ring carrying a Russian flag. After Lana got the obligatory Putin reference out of the way, they were then interrupted by a flag waving Mojo Rawley. He charged at Rusev and was immediately overwhelmed and destroyed him ending the beating with 2 Accolade camel clutches, one in the ring and one on the floor at Lana’s command.

A great piece then aired on the Women’s Championship match focusing on family pride.

Paige arrived to that the Full Sail crown and wish the best of luck to both competitors in the Women’s Championship final.

Charlotte w/ Ric Flair vs. Natalya w/ Bret Hart ( NXT Women’s Championship)

Best match on the show and maybe one of the five greatest North American womens matches of all time. They did a perfect job building the drama of this match both in the ring and outside. This match was a labor of love for those involved and that is always a pleasure to see and that does absolutely translate to the audience in the arena and at home. The match finish came when the ladies were exchanging submission finishers. They did possibly the longest figure-4 reversal spot in history as they rolled from one end of the ring to the other rolling outside with with Charlotte still holding on as the referee counted to 5 for a break. Once back in the Charlotte put Nattie in the Sharpshooter right in Bret’s face. Nattie was able to use her last bit of strength to escape but that was all she had left as she fell prey to Charlotte’s Bow Down To The Queen for the win. After the match everyone exchanged hugs in an emotional scene as both Ric and Charlotte were in tears. The whole thing was phenomenal and worth $9.99 on its own.

Adrian Neville vs. Tyson Kidd (NXT Championship)

Good match but it was not able to come close to the match that preceded it or reach the Zayn/Breeze match either. Following such exciting matches and the loser stigma attached to Kidd probably led to a less excited crown to close the show. To their credit, they used the stigma attached to Kidd as the story of the match and it built well. They got the crowd going again with a hot finishing sequence that saw Neville get the win with the Red Arrow corkscrew splash. After the match, a frustrated Kidd refused to shake Neville’s hand and stormed off.

Grades

Camacho – Improving steadily but still ways to go. Having a gimmick thats a copy of a copy, of copy, of a copy, etc. doesn’t help matters either. Grade: C

Adam Rose – He was in all his glory back at Full Sail but unfortunately they do not film Raw at Full Sail every week. The jury is still out as to whether his niche cult following can translate to big arenas across the world. That is also an issue with other cult NXT acts (see Emma). His in-ring was nothing special either which might be concerning for someone who spent so long in developmental. Grade: C+

The Ascension – Still a couple of green muscleheads without a lot of upside in my opinion. They were at their best tossing about smaller wrestlers here but they won’t always be in situations so specifically designed for them. Grade: C

Kalisto and Local – They didn’t get the opportunity to show much here and Local showed that he still hasn’t gotten the message about his physique. If this is the lowest weight he can naturally cut down to then all involved really need to think about his in-ring future. Grade: D-

Sami Zayn – What more can be said? He is a tremendously gifted performer who I’ve never seen in a bad match. Tonight his job was to get another man over while still keeping himself just as over as he came in and he did that in spades. Grade: A

Tyler Breeze – Breeze had a lot to prove here and I believe he succeeded in surpassing even the most optimistic expectations. He proved that he can go with the best and he is ready to challenge for the NXT Championship. Grade: A

Rusev/Lana – Basic stuff from them but I noticed an intensity from Rusev that has been missing on Raw and I am interested in seeing more that from him. Grade: B-

Mojo Rawley – I don’t get the Hype Man. He does nothing for me and him doing a low rent Jim Duggan impersonation was especially horrible. Grade: F

Natalya – I’m going to preface this by saying that I am not a Nattie fan at all. There is something about the way she carries herself, both in the ring and on Total Divas, that just makes her unlikeable to me. I won’t say much more than that because I’m not looking to take over the mantle as Stunt Granny’s resident “angry white man” (cough Jeremy Maes cough). That all out of the way; what a brilliant performance by Natalya here. She was the glue that held this match together and I don’t know if there is any other WWE Diva who could have lead Charlotte to that amazing of a match so early in her career. Grade: A+

Charlotte – She will be the most athletic diva of all time and in 5 years she will be the one leading the next great female athlete through her first great match. This show was much about her as anyone and she delivered a great performance beyond her years pro. Grade: A

Adrian Neville – He had a lot to follow so this was not a showcase night for him. He still put on a very good performance and was able to get an exhausted crowd back up one more time with his big moves in the homestretch. That is an accomplishment in its own right. Grade: B+

Tyson Kidd – This was a big night for him and, while I can’t say he blew me away, he performed well. The Tyson Kidd persona, as it stands, is damaged goods. But the guy is a talented performer and there may be potential for him as a heel if he can channel his legitimate professional frustrations into a new persona. A run as a Paul Heyman Guy could work for him (watch the post-show for more on this featuring a masterful performance from Heyman stirring things up between husband and wife). Grade: B

Overall Show – A fantastic show on all fronts. A show with 2 great matches, one very good match, great production, good announcing, and nothing offensive  gets a very high recommendation. Watch this show! Overall Grade: A – Chris

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Wrestlemania XXX Preview: The Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Andre The Giant Battle RoyalJeremy & Kevin start the second half of their Wrestlemania previews with a look at a match announced by Hulk Hogan, the Andre The Giant Battle Royal. He didn’t announce what the prize was for winning. The WWE hasn’t announced anything in the time since then. So does it matter if Big Show wins? Or will he get to continue his losing ways? Does it matter that Dolph Ziggler has been on a winning streak? How about Big E Langston who isn’t defending the Intercontinental Title? Could a returning Rey Mysterio beat the odds again? Will Kofi Kingston get to be a spot monkey? Will Sheamus Brogue Kick everyone out of the ring? Will one of the mystery guests win the Battle Royal? Is anyone speculating on who will be in the vacant spots? Jeremy & Kevin’s big question of this show though is, why are some of these other jokers getting a Wrestlemania bonus if they can’t crack one of the main television shows? Shouldn’t the over talent want an even larger slice of the pie? Both of yours hosts would so click on the link below for something we won’t earn a dime off.

 

WrestleMania XXX Preview Shows
WrestleMania XXX Preview: WWE Tag Team Championship Fatal 4-Way Match
WrestleMania XXX Preview: Bray Wyatt vs John Cena
WrestleMania XXX Preview: Vickie Guerrero Divas Championship Invitational
WrestleMania XXX Preview: Brock Lesnar vs The Undertaker

Stunt Granny Audio Show #253

Fanning Yourself With MoneyJeremy & Kevin start the show off by talking about Charlotte’s mayor being picked up by the FBI on bribery charges. What exactly was he taking bribes for? And is his wife in deep trouble too? Will she have something to help sell her fellow prisoners? They finally get around to talking about wrestling by talking about the ratings on Impact Wrestling and Total Divas. Does it matter that TNA lost to the Divas even though they’re on different networks and days of the week? Why are people still checking out the ratings by the quarter hour? What does the swing in ratings mean about the hard core audience? One person who wasn’t a factor in the ratings this week on Raw was Daniel Bryan. Was it good that he was selling his beating so close to Wrestlemania? Is there an expectation to see wrestlers no matter how much of a beat down they have received? How could Daniel Bryan benefit from being off this week? Did HHH & Stephanie take advantage of his absence to heel it up? Jeremy & Kevin move along to talking the build up for Brock Lesnar versus Undertaker. Why does Undertaker always get the upper hand in their exchanges? Doesn’t that cement what everyone already thinks, that the Undertaker will win his 22 straight match? Why is the WWE concentrating on building up Undertaker when they need to build up Brock as good enough to break the streak? The Undertaker is definitely near the end of his career, but is Christian also with his most recent injury? How long has Christian been back from TNA? Has Christian had a Hall of Fame career? Who does the WWE have to replace him? Find out the answer to these questions and more when you click on the link below!

Stunt Granny Audio #251

From the Puck Daddy Blog on Yahoo! Sports

From the Puck Daddy Blog on Yahoo! Sports

Jeremy & Kevin are back for another fun filled edition of the Stunt Granny Audio. They start off by talking about children because Baby Momma Drama still has children’s stuff in Kevin’s condo. Jeremy makes quick mention of the fine establishments that he got his engagement pictures snapped at. They move on to the breaking news that the “stars” of “Big World, Little People” are on a hiatus from their marriage. How many short jokes can they make in a couple of minutes? Jeremy & Kevin finally get around to talking wrestling and they start with the big news of the week, Daniel Bryan. Why did Kevin have a problem with how the Authority reacted to the #OccupyRaw movement. Jeremy wonders if the segment would have been helped out by not having Bryan have to focus his wrath on both Stephanie McMahon and HHH. How would you like to get on Stephanie’s bad side in real life with that scream? Everyone is assuming that HHH will lose to Daniel Bryan. What do the guys speculate would happen if HHH put himself over? How would he celebrate the victory? Who would be taking pictures of the stunned crowd? How would the crowd react for the rest of Wrestlemania, Raw & Smackdown? Kevin changes his tune about the planning for matches at Wrestlemania. What match on Wikipedia is a stretch to be considered a main event match? It won’t be a stretch for you to click on the link below to find out the answers to these questions and more.

Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of @WWE #Raw

hanging-tents-for-rock-climbers-1I’m hoping to get some extra sleep tonight. I’m not feeling the best. Hopefully I’ll get the illness bug out of my system so I don’t have to worry about it at Wrestlemania. When checking for images related to sleeping, it caught my eye when I saw “Sleeping while rock climbing.” That’s where the image above comes from. That’d be fun to do once. I slept in a tree house for my honeymoon so this isn’t that far from the pail.

Hulk Hogan comes down and shills for the WWE Network. We get the first annual 30 Man Andre the Giant Battle for a trophy. Memphonites? John Cena saves us. He shills for Hogan and the match. Cena then joins it. The Wyatts are here. Maybe they’ll save the segment. I dig his promo. Calling himself a god is pretty ironic considering the pride talk. Cena comes back with the jokes about the same subject. Better than normal for his jokes. Cena challenges him to a match at Wrestlemania. Luke Harper & Erick Rowan step onto the apron. Commercial.

Cena is in a match with Rowan. Hogan is a Cena cheerleader. Rowan is using his size to his advantage. Cena wins with a roll up out of the blue. What a weak win. Harper & Rowan pretend like they’re going to go after Cena & Hogan but the Wyatts back away.

Stephanie & HHH come out to the stage. She is really doing well with the smug quality. They are being kind and not firing Daniel Bryan. They want an apology from him though. Short and sweet. The New Age Outlaws come out to do commentary. Very choppy start to the show.

Curtis Axel & Curtis Axel are in the ring. The Usos hit the ring. Then replays of last week. Road Dogg claims that the NAO were under the weather during their loss. U-SO! It’s kind of cool that they’re finisher is the flying tag and Samoan splash combo. Kane talks to the Shield. He wants to know if they’re disposable. Reigns & Rollins are going to take on Cody Rhodes & Goldust. Rollins gives Kane some guff about his losses. The chop continues.

Jack Swagger is taking on Big E Langston again. Zeb Colter & Cesaro are at ring side. Big E wants in on the Battle Royal at Wrestlemania. I’m glad that is over shadowing the match. Belly to Belly suplex gets my attention. Swagger takes out Big E’s knee. Swagger distracts the ref and asks for Cesaro‘s help which doesn’t help. Swagger had said at the start the match that “I’ve got this.” Big E rolls up Swagger for the win. Zeb Colter watches them bicker like school girls. Zeb blows his stack. Swagger & Cesaro shake but Cesaro puts in an extra squeeze.

The Undertaker allows me to catch up a little bit. Paul Heyman shows up before he can say anything. Heyman gives us a break down of winning streaks at Wrestlemania. He asks Taker not to wrestle Brock at Wrestlemania so that everyone can worship the streak and Taker longer. “The fear of the unknown is the greatest of all.” Sure Taker, sounds great in that voice. Rest In Peace. At some point tonight, I’ll have a long paragraph. (Next Day Note: It’s kind of funny how I can complain about the usual 15 minute segment then complain when they change it up. It would have helped if I would have cared about any of these segments. I like a lot of people in these segments but everything was too short.)

Seth Rollins starts against Cody Rhodes. Cody face plants Rollins. Goldust takes over. Downward Spiral by Rollins into the middle turn buckle. Roman Reigns gets his start in the match. Goldust showing off the twisting cross body block. Cody does him one better by doing a spring board cross body. Commercial. Lawler tried to put over a power Samoan Drop by Reigns. I’m not buying it. Samoan Leap drop kick. Reigns starts playing with Goldust. Power slam by Goldust doesn’t quite get the hot tag. Rollins is in to fight a hot tagged Cody. Moonsault gets a two count. Cody with a Muscle Buster.  He stole that from Samoa Joe! (Next Day Note: I can’t believe this isn’t a Twitter beef yet.) Goldust gets speared. Rollins reverses out of the Cross Rhodes. Rollins finishes him off with the buckle bomb & Curb Stomp combo. A good match breaks up the chop even with a commercial.

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Kevin’s Blog: Definitely Live & Half Assed Review of WWE Elimination Chamber

19thCenturyMaidsWe get a nice video montage of the participants of the Elimination Chamber. The WWE starts with what I see as a true curtain jerker, Jack Swagger taking on Big E Langston for the Intercontinental Title. By the time I settled in, Swagger had been on the offensive for a decent spell. Big E and Swagger clothes line each other for an opening. Langston still doesn’t get it. Langston gets in some clothesline and a belly to belly suplex. Swagger turned a splash into a spine buster. Langston spears Swagger off the apron through the ropes. Big E getting in on the flying. Swagger tosses Big E off the top rope. Swagger takes him out at the knee. Big E kicks his way out of the Patriot Lock. Botched spot looks terrible. Big E enziguris Swagger out of the Patriot Lock. Big Ending for the win. I feel like they’ve let Big E slide here during the EC build up. Glad to see him get a needed win. Bad New Barrett gets himself a fancy pulpit now. He tries to hype up Russia having more gold medals. I’d take CM Punk in Wrestlemania over Hulk Hogan hosting it.

The New Age Outlaws come out first for their match. Road Dogg does his thing. The Usos should really get this win. Jimmy starts out against Billy Gunn. They take turns exchanging basic moves. Jey gets to take on Road Dogg. James hip tosses Jey into the turn buckles. Gunn gets to continue the beat down. Spinning kick to the face of Road Dogg allows the hot tag to Jimmy. He cleans house and finishes with a Samoan Drop. Road Dogg saves the butt splash. Dogg takes the over the top rope dive. Super kick on Gunn only gets a two. Road Dogg gets popped by Jimmy. Billy Gunn rolls up Jimmy for the win. Just stupid. Bad News Barrett delivers news on our level. He tries to say the fans will turn on Daniel Bryan because he’s not wrestling tonight? No one buys it.

Darren Young comes down because they didn’t book this pay per view very well. Titus O’Neil has a dog on his ass. The crowd wants Lesnar. I don’t blame them. Young gets in some offense with a discus forearm. Young clothes lines both of them out of the ring.  Young clothes lines him from the top rope. O’Neil tosses Young over the turn buckles to the outside. O’Neil tosses Young against the ring post. O’Neil locks in a bear hug. O’Neil catches a flying Young and gives him a back breaker. O’Neil gives Young Eric’s favorite move the abdominal stretch. Young reigns punches on O’Neil.  Neck breaker on the apron only gets Young a two count. Clash of the Titus aka Sky high for the win. Lawler is right, not exactly a resounding win for O’Neil. Bad News Barrett greets us again. Electrical malfunction on his riser. Ha. Nice cover. His material has been terrible tonight.

The Shield comes out first for the six man elimination match. The Wyatt Family ambles out next. How is this awesome before the match starts? A melee starts the match. It settles quickly. Seth Rollins starts against Erick Rowan. Rollins uses his speed to get the upper hand. Roman Reigns takes over for a brief moment. Rollins is back in and gets steam rolled. Luke Harper comes in to start a beat down. Bray Wyatt is up next. Reigns gets a tag. He takes over a little bit. Harper comes in and starts to take a beating. Dean Ambrose finally gets to come in. Harper drop kicks Ambrose. Wyatt takes over. Very back and forth match so far. No one has sold for long. Ambrose gets crushed in the corner with a splash. Rowan loves the knuckles to the temples. Ambrose bites him. Sidewalk slam by Rowan. Rollins gets a tag and uses speed on Harper. Rowan distracts Rollins on the top rope. Rollins lands on his feet off a top rope suplex. Rollins knees Harper in the head. Sidewalk slam on Rollins. Bray back splashes Rollins on the outside. Rowan slams Rollins. Harper hammers Rollins. Wyatt gets booted on a charge. Wyatt slams Rollins. Harper kicks Ambrose in the mouth when he tries to save Rollins. Harper flips Rollins who kicks him in the face. Reigns gets the hot tag. Reigns apron drop kick. Reigns slams down  Rowan. Ambrose starts on some other people. Harper with a suicide dive. Rollins with a flip dive. Reigns and Rowan clothes line each other. Rollins takes apart the Spanish announce table. Wyatt & Harper try to double team him but Ambrose makes the save. Wyatt & Ambrose fight in the crowd. Reigns and Rowan are still legal in the ring. Superman punch only gets two. Rollins starts on Harper but Wyatt makes the save. Wyatt takes apart the regular announce table.  Fall away slam by Rowan tosses Reigns outside. Rollins takes a double urinogi through the Spanish announce table. Reigns is in the ring. The Wyatts surround him. Harper tags in. Splash and big boot combo. Wyatt tags in. Reigns gets out of the Kiss. Superman punch on Rowan then on Wyatt. Spear to Harper. Wyatt rams Reigns. Sister Abigail’s Kiss for the win. Wow, fun stuff.

Christian gets a promo before the Elimination Chamber match. AJ Lee gets to talk about her title reign. Cameron comes out to accept her challenge. Well, at least I can remember the last match. Cameron tosses her pom poms at AJ. Cameron goes for a pair of quick pins. I grabbed a beer. I think AJ had some offense. Cameron turned it around. Sloppy Thesz press by Cameron. AJ dances with the pom poms. Tamina accidently takes out AJ. Tamina grabs AJ’s leg. Cameron goes after Tamina. She ends up getting clothes lined. Tamina gets AJ disqualified. Bad News Barrett still has a none functioning podium. People are going to be fired and expelled from school because of the WWE Network. Santino is playing with toys when Emma comes in. The Great Khali comes. Then Los Matadores. Oh, it’s wrestling Lego’s. I was ready to fast forward the commercials.

Batista gets to have a match. The lady and I are trying to figure out why Batista pointed at his crotch. Alberto Del Rio comes out in a track suit and a neck brace. ADR can’t compete tonight. ADR attacks with a crutch. He focuses on the knee. ADR tosses Batista into the ring post. Cross arm breaker thru the ropes. Del Rio works over the arm. The crowd is crapping all over this match by chanting all kinds of names. Loving the Boo-tista chant. Batista uses the ropes to break a pin. Spear by Batista as ADR got back in the ring. ADR takes back over quickly. Spinebuster by Batista. ADR gets out of the Batista Bomb. Kick to the head only gets a two count. ADR hits the exposed turn buckle. Batista Bomb for the win. It would have really helped if ADR had any credibility now.

John Cena, Christian, Randy Orton and Daniel Bryan are the gentlemen in the pods. Cesaro and Sheamus get to start us off, likely with some hard hitting. Cesaro gets the clubbing as the first big move of the match. Cesaro dodges a charging Sheamus who runs into the post. Low double stomp by Cesaro. He upper cuts Sheamus a lot. Sheamus goes to the top but Cesaro catches him with another upper cut. Flying shoulder tackle. Daniel Bryan is next. Double drop kick. Bryan takes out Cesaro & Sheamus. He kicks both of them. Sheamus kicks Bryan. Cesaro gets suplexed by Bryanb who had Sheamus tied up. Back breaker by Cesaro on Bryan. Cesaro got thrown into the chamber but he turned Bryan around tossed him into the pod. Let’s see if Bryan takes the Edge coffee break. He doesn’t take it. Christian is the next one in. He tosses Sheamus off the top ropes. Christian tosses Bryan shoulder first into the cage. Tornado DDT only gets Christian two on Bryan. Enziguri by Bryan. Christian ducks out of a charge by Bryan. Sheamus looks like he’s going to lawn dart Christian who turns it into a reverse DDT. Cesaro power bombs Christian into a pod then upper cuts him. Cesaro slams into Sheamus. Gut wrench suplex onto the lexan and metal. John Cena is in. Bryan kicks Cena. Cesaro, Christian and Cena turn in a weird catapult move. Cena slams Christian into the chains. Super upper cut by Cesaro only gets a two. Bryan gets reckless and attacks everyone. Cesaro can’t pin Sheamus. Randy Orton comes in and attacks everyone. Orton becomes cornered. Orton gets back in the pod. Sheamus stares at him. Sheamus Brogue Kicks Orton thru the lexan. Everyone saw that coming, right? Cena Five Knuckle Shuffle’s Orton. Cesaro swings Orton. Bryan gives Cesaro a roling German Suplex. Sheamus Brogue Kicks Cena. Christian rolls up Sheamus then tries to pin Cena. Christian gets out of a Celtic Cross by crawling on top of a pod. Orton second rope suplexes Sheamus. Christian splashes Sheamus from the top of the pod for our first elimination. These finishes are going to come fairly quick judging from the time. Running Knee by Bryan on Christian for another pin. The final four look at each other. Cesaro pairs off with Cena. Orton takes on Bryan. Cena and Bryan face off. They trade blows. Cesaro German suplexes Cena who is holding Bryan. Gut wrench into a head scissors. AA onto the lexan. Cena locks in the STF. Cesaro taps. No one is surprised it’s down to these three. The Wyatts darken the arena. They’re in the Chamber. They take out Bryan and then take on Cena. Sister Abigail’s Kiss on Cena. Orton slowly comes out and pins Cena. The Wyatts are waiting as Cena comes out of the Chamber. Kane directs them from ring side.  Bryan knees Kane in the head. Orton tosses him into a pod. Orton sets him up for a big move but Bryan puts him in a tree of woe. Triple low drop kicks. Belly to back suplex from the top rope. Running knee by Bryan but Kane pulls the official out. Kane cracks Bryan. RKO only gets a two count. Small package by Bryan gets a two count. Bryan hulks out. Kane upper cuts him. RKO again for the win. No surprise. They played up him not winning too much. Batista vs Randy Orton is going to get booed out of New Orleans and it’ll be hilarious. I can’t wait to be there. – Kevin

Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of @WWE #Raw

frozen-beerSo I didn’t end up getting a new refrigerator until Saturday. I tried to get the old fridge repaired but when that failed, I had to go for the new one. After checking out the appropriate outlet stores, I made a purchase. The delivery came two hours late. Oh The humanity! Ha ha ha. The fridge has been restocked. I’m just glad my beers have finally unfrozen. Luckily none of them got to the state of the beer above. Time to watch some wrestling. Let’s roll.

Betty White and Big Show lead off the show. She’s going to kick ass tonight. (Next Day Note: No one is shocked she didn’t.) HHH then big foots her. How dare he! Doesn’t he know who she is? (Please note the heavy dose of sarcasm.) Before Steph can say anything, Randy Orton comes down. She gets to bring the condescension. Orton apologizes to them. It’s coming from his heart. Ha. Orton wants more TV time on other shows. Daniel Bryan comes out. Steph lays down the law. Bryan wants a match with Kane. He insults Steph & HHH. Randy Orton gives their rebuttal. HHH gives Bryan a rest. He’s getting a well deserved day off. Ha. I agree with JBL. It’s good to give your stars a rest.

Rey Mysterio is teaming with Cody Rhodes & Goldust against the Wyatt Family. Good win for Bray Wyatt on Smackdown. That’s the kind of credibility that would have helped me believe his win against Daniel Bryan. Erick Rowan starts against Rhodes. Goldust gets a quick tag. Luke Harper takes over. I love that Rey Mysterio sliding spot. It’s ridiculous. Goldust is still being beat down after the break. Bray Wyatt comes to continue the offense. Goldust power slams Harper to get Rey into the match. 619 to Harper. Wyatt pulls Rey from a spring board attempt. Rey goes for a 2nd 619 when Bray Wyatt makes a blind tag, I guess? Wyatt turns the run into a Sister Abigail. Kind of cool. Follow the buzzards.

The Shield gets the recap video. Renee Young gets to interview them. She starts with questioning Roman Reigns. Seth Rollins gets a short talk. Dean Ambrose gets questioned about defending the US title. After Reigns questions his manhood, Ambrose makes an open challenge. Vickie Guerrero, The Bellas and Natalya get their time with Betty White get their time until the Road Dogg & Billy Gunn take her away.

Fandango is in the ring with Summer Rae to start us off. He’s taking on Santino Marella with Emma. It seems like a good way to introduce her character which seemed weird to start with. Keeps Santino fresh with someone new to play off. The Miz complains on the head sets again. He’s like Bad News Barrett except slightly different. The circus surrounding the match made me forget one was going on. Fandango with the top rope leg drop for the win. Byron Saxton is back? Why? More faces for the WWE Network? Sheamus points out the obvious that he can still main event Wrestlemania if he wins the Elimination Chamber. Fair enough promo.

Christian is Sheamus’s partner against the Real Americans. They snuck back into the WWE. Antonio Cesaro finally gets some mic time. He’s going to be the WWE Champion. Not much of a promo. Zeb Colter makes Jack Swagger wait on the apron to start the match. Swagger gets an early tag anyway. Christian gets in enough offense to get Sheamus in. I dig the fighting between Cesaro & Sheamus. Cesaro tosses Sheamus outside. Swagger drags down Sheamus. Cesaro takes advantage. We get a break. They’re still going at it. Christian gets the hot tag. Cesaro ends the streak with a super upper cut. Swagger gator rolls him. Swagger bomb followed by the double stomp. Big Swing tosses Christian outside the ring. Christian barely beats the count. Quick pin doesn’t work. Sheamus gets the real hot tag. Swagger is on the end of the ass kicking. No surprise given the present story line. Cesaro makes the save for Swagger. Jack turns the distraction into a Patriot Lock. Christian makes the save. Brogue Kick. Sheamus brings Christian back in to celebrate. John Cena gets Renee Young’s second interview. He’s going to beat Randy Orton in the middle of the ring. Everyone needs to go through him to get to the WWE Championship.

My Avery Brewing Company Karma is quite cold. And tasty. #SippyTimeBeer. I buzz through the Batista bomb Youtube clips and the entrances of both Dolph Ziggler and Alberto Del Rio. Ziggler gets to show off early in the match. Fame Asser only gets a two count. Thrust kick to the head ends the match in short order. Wow Dolph, you are out. Cross arm breaker on Ziggler after the match brings out Batista in ring gear. Spear. The Animal tosses Del Rio into the barricade. Batista Bomb thru the announce table.

HHH runs into Batista. HHH wants Batista to keep it in the ring. HHH gives him a match against Del Rio at Elimination Chamber. The third Hall of Fame entrant is Lita. Cool. The New Age Outlaws are still hanging out with Betty White. They’re having tea. She does the cup switch-a-roo. I’m in stitches. (Sarcasm alert.)

The New Age Outlaws are now at ring side. The Usos come out. They are taking on Curtis Axel & Ryback. The Usos are on the attack early. Billy Gunn still gets to play dumb. Woof. The Goldberg chant makes no sense at this point. I’ve been paying more attention to the ramblings of Road Dogg. Jimmy flies over the top ropes and takes out Ryback so that Jey can splash Curtis Axel for the win. Slick finish. Gunn pretends he has to poop. Oh, she put something in it. Even funnier. (You get it by now, right?)

Dean Ambrose is in the ring when Mark Henry answers his challenge. Rollins & Reigns get out of the ring for formal introductions. Ambrose acts defiant. He has to deal with Henry’s power to start. He tries to take advantage of the elbow injury but it doesn’t work. Ambrose got tossed into a ring post. Ambrose takes off his brace. Henry tosses Ambrose outside with his good arm. Break. Ambrose is still working over Henry’s elbow. Ambrose goes for his finisher. Henry pushes him off and gives him a World’s Strongest Slam on the rebound. Seth Rollins interferes to get a DQ. Reigns spears Henry to put him out of the picture. The Wyatts are here. The Shield comes back over the barrier. The Wyatts come closer. The Shield step up to the apron. The Wyatts reply. Then they back out like the heels should do. Bray is saying “Make your move” as he holds his arms out.

My ring time will be "Girl Bye" when Naomi gets back. From zimbio.com

My ring time will be “Girl Bye” when Naomi gets back. From zimbio.com

Bobo Brazil gets the tribute for Black History Month. Ernie Ladd inducted into the WWF Hall of Fame. Brie & Nikki Bella are teaming with Cameron. Nikki starts against AJ Lee. Mitchell Cool acknowledges Naomi’s eye socket injury. I remember the initial reports but never remembered seeing a recovery time frame. Middle rope drop kick gets two for Brie. Aksana is kneeing Brie’s back. She didn’t mess up her spine. Alicia Fox gets her time in the ring. Mitchell Cool says “She’s improved, hasn’t she?” as Cameron botches a move. JBL seconds the point. Woof. DDT on Aksana for the Cameron win. Wow. She’s a complete train wreck that deserves to be a reality show like Total Divas. She’s awful in the ring.

Alexander Rusev is impressive. At least they’ve thrown things off by making him from Bulgaria instead of Russia. Kane comes down to the ring. Kane starts to apologize when Daniel Bryan hits the ring. Bryan drop kicks him over the barrier.

They get Betty White on TV one last time to say she was on. John Cena takes on Randy Orton start with 25 minutes left on my DVR. They start off slow, tipping off to me that they’ll use most of that time. Cena starts a slugging come back shortly after the break. He misses a flying shoulder tackle. Orton lets Cena get back up to the apron. Suplex on the way into the ring. Vicious looking DDT by Orton only gets a  two count. Garvin Stomp. Cena makes the full come back. Five Knuckle Shuffle. Orton back breaker out of the AA. Cena back drops Orton out of the ring. Orton power slam but Orton show boats long enough to cost himself. Tower DDT from the top rope. Orton yells at the crowd. Cena turns an RKO into an STF.  Orton gets to the ropes. Orton backs up to go for the punt. Cena  goes for the AA. RKO by Orton. Cena kicks out. AA but Orton kicks out. I’m thinking this is better than their match at the Rumble. Orton fights out of a Top Rope AA. Cena leg drop to the back of the head. Another AA for the win. Fun stuff. Nothing after it either. Cool. – Kevin

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