News You Can Use: C.M. Punk, Sting & WWE Slam City

From misfits.cinderblock.com

From misfits.cinderblock.com

– A couple of stories struck me over the weekend. One being that Dana White was asked if CM Punk would fight in the UFC. It always reminds me that the majority of wrestling fans are dumb as bricks. CM Punk wears a Gracie Jiu Jitsu hoodie and incorporates mixed martial arts moves into his professional wrestling move set so that automatically makes him good enough to fight in the best MMA company in the world. I can’t wait to start playing hockey for the Pittsburgh Penguins because I wear their shirts often and have been known to use moves by Sidney Crosby & Evgeni Malkin on my nephews to score goals in bubble hockey. CM Punk was also in the news because he was on “The Talking Dead“. I guess that would make him an actor so he should immediately be one of the detectives on the next season of True Detectives.

Sting participated in a Q&A in England and was asked if he was going to face Undertaker at Wrestlemania 31. I’m glad that bricks can now speak or else I wouldn’t have content for the site. At least Sting was smart enough to say “I really don’t know. I can say that I would love for that to happen.” because that is as likely to happen as CM Punk capturing a title in the UFC.

WWE has teamed with Mattel to make WWE Slam City, a cartoon that will have 26 two minute episodes. They already have four episodes posted. It’s definitely for children so I’m not sure I can review it properly. I may watch a PG product about fake fighting but I have standards. I’ll have my nephews view it and give me a review for the site. I’m sure they’ll do that for their super cool uncle who happens to play for the Penguins. – Kevin

Thanks to Prowrestling.net for the news stories.

Retro Movie Review – The Octagon Starring Chuck Norris

octagonmovieposter

Ken and Kevin are back with another edition of the Retro Movie Review. Kevin suggested The Octogan after having his memory jogged by Dana White on Joe Rogan’s Podcast. Did Ken get to watch this movie as a child? Did his father approve of Chuck Norris? Why is that even relevant? No one is surprised that Chuck Norris is a bad ass in this movie but what caused this bad ass to turn his back on participating in karate tournaments. There are both mercenary ninjas and terrorist ninjas in this movie. Lee Van Cleef leads the mercenary ninjas. Who leads the terrorist ninjas and what relation does he have? Why aren’t both of these groups one in the same? What did the terrorist ninjas do to get such a reputation? How much of a mystique are put on ninjas in this movie?  Ken & Kevin get around to talking about Chuck Norris’s physique. What contribution did Ken’s wife make? How old was Chuck Norris when he filmed this movie in 1980? If terrorist ninjas were recruiting, where would you look to sign up? What do the terrorist recruits have in common with the rag tag group of cabbies in D.C. Cab? Chuck is slaying the ladies in this movie but who ends up being his true love interest? And how exactly does she help him invade The Octagon? Find that out and more when you click the play button below!

Stunt Granny Audio #185

The new ROH Champion is proud of his body.

It’s time for another rip roaring edition of Stunt Granny Audio, with Kevin and Dusty at the helm for your listening enjoyment. The fearless duo starts things off by talking about the illustrious new ROH World Champion, Kevin Steen. Can Dusty make up his mind on who he wants to compare Steen to? Is it Dusty Rhodes or Playboy Buddy Rose? Would a rose by any other name smell just as stinky as ROH’s decision to put the belt on him? Or does Kevin actually like the idea? One thing they definitely agree on is that ROH is in big trouble if they can’t get their shit together with regards to running the iPPVs. Are they on a mission to look as unprofessional as possible, or are they just that incompetent? They then move on to talking about the latest WWE Revolution? Is it going to be every bit as revolutionary as the last revolution? Is Kevin all revolutioned out? And finally, they delve into the earth shattering revelation of Linda Hogan and her new line of cosmetics. Dusty makes a startling confession about the whole thing, but you have to listen to find out what it is, and it’s only going to cost you about an hour of your dull, meaningless life. So get on it!

Stunt Granny Audio Show #185

Stunt Granny Audio Show #182

It took a day to recover but Jeremy and Kevin are back from UFC 145. What did they enjoy about the event? What can be done to make the live experience better?  Who has the better fans? The most important part though is what can WWE and UFC learn from one another? Thy also discuss some sports entertainment as they turn their attention to Monday Night Raw. What worked? What was the actual length of the Brock Lesnar contract signing? Did it clock in less than 45 minutes or was it actually that long? How much fun was the CM Punk boozehound angle? Who saw that coming huh? What does the future hold for Paul Bearer and is Beth Phoenix just that god of an actress? All this and more awaits and all you have to do is download it. Unless you have subscribed to us on iTunes you would have it already.

Stunt Granny Audio Show #182

There’s two sides to every story

Kurt Angle, pictured above, is not to be trusted.

Kurt Angle’s story, as told by bloodyellow.com:

Anyone who knows much about Kurt Angle knows that he is a very colorful storyteller. Basically, the truth might not be as important as the story to Kurt, who is a pro wrestler for the TNA organization. It’s an old pro wrestling adage (coined by Dick Murdoch, I believe) – “If a story’s worth tellin’, it’s worth colorin’ up a little bit”. Angle did an interview with UK publication The Void where he ventured further of the path of realism and actually claimed that Dana White wanted him to fight Kimbo Slice. Here, read for yourself: I called him (White) a couple of year later – I was getting a little tired of wrestling – I said “Hey, I’m ready”, so we had another meeting and he had me do a physical, and he threw a great offer at me, but said “I need you in four and a half weeks.” I said “I can”t do that. You’ve gotta give me 3-6 months,” but he said “I need you in four a half weeks,” so I said “Well then, we’re not going to be able to do this.”

To which Dana White fired back, saying the real story is that Angle was almost on Season 10 of The Ultimate Fighter with Kimbo Slice, Matt Mitrione, Brendan Schaub and Roy Nelson, but he was “medically disqualified”.

In this mixed up crazy no good world in which we live in, who can you possibly believe?? – Dusty

Brock Lesnar vs. prairie dogs

Yeah this is UFC news but just go with it alright. Anyway, Brock Lesnar has resurfaced after his surgery in a commercial plugging Fusion Ammunition. Yep, what’s the best thing to do after a recovering from major surgery? You go kill prairie dogs with heavy weaponry.

Now look, hunting is pretty unfair as it is and idiotic when there are perfectly good means of farming livestock and torturing them for a short while before skinning them alive. So yes him shooting a prairie dog with a rifle, a gun that looks like an M-16 but probably isn’t and then randomly firing a 50-cal is tremendous. What makes this video newsworthy is the fact you can flip a prairie dog with a bullet to the head. Also, how dumb are prairie dogs? They clearly hear a gun shot so what is the first thing they do? Stick their miniscule head out of the hole that’s what. It’s like they are in a horror movie and just have to investigate. Fucking idiots.

As I told Kevin earlier; hunting is childish if you do it for sport but in this case an exception can be made if Brock was hunting with firecrackers and a goldfish net. -Jeremy

Kevin’s Blog: Definitely Live & Half Assed Review of Raw

Big Week here at Stunt Granny HQ.

I typed in “Big Week” in the Google image search. I had a hard time figuring out why this would be under that category. I guess spring break is a big week. I only had a real spring break when I was studying over in Italy. That ruled.

CM Punk is sitting Indian style in the ring. Nice start. Never would think they’d go in this direction. Huge reaction for him. Are we in Canada? An excellent choice for an opener. This feud needed more time on TV than it has gotten. Punk gets the DDT. Randall thinking about the punt.  Crowd against Punk now. Keith collapses under his own weight. Crowd chants CM Punk. I’m confused. Randy chant. Make up your mind.Orton is playing hurt well. Punk hits the GTS but gets to lose at Wrestlemania. Punk is one of the few people to not get embarrassed in his hometown.

Edge explains that he can attack Del Rio on Raw. Christian and him are headed to the ring.

Grabbed myself a beer. Yuengling rocks. I’m trying out how to pimp this blog. Flipping through my Twitter as Del Rio takes his grand time getting to the ring. Dana White pimped the #WWE because his boy the Rock is on Raw. Nothing going on in the match with Clay starting for the heels.

Clay has to be called impressive. Dude has had 3 matches in the last week. Who was the winner of NXT again? Del Rio trips up Edge going for the spear. Edge ends up giving it to Clay anyway. Del Rio attacks Christian, Edge runs him off. Del Rio gives Edge the Cross Arm Breaker. Guess we know two winners on Sunday now. Del Rio shouldn’t win the title already anyway. Talk about too much, too soon. Oh my lord, the “bar” that Snooki & Trish are at is terrible.

Why is Cole pimping an iPad? Is he supposed to be slick and cool like the Miz because of it? Cole tells King he has to wrestle Swagger. Not much meat to sink my teeth into writing wise so far. They’re highlighting the matches so I can’t bitch. South Park’s “Montage” will never leave my had as they show video of HHH & Undertaker.

Continue reading

Stunt Granny Audio #60

Godzilla and King Kong really knew how to rampage

Godzilla and King Kong really knew how to rampage

Dusty and Kevin take a spin on the turn tables this week. We talked on a couple of “old” topics that are keeping our interest, Jim Cornette & Bret Hart, a new star that could be created and his Vince McMahon-esque ex-employer,  Quinton “Rampage” Jackson & Dana White, then finally meander our way into talking about some of the problems on Raw with the lone highlight coming from a now replaced Diva and end on a positive note yapping about the quality of ECW.

Stunt Granny Audio Show #60

%d bloggers like this: