Jeremy’s One Paragraph Movie Review: Bad Ass (2012)

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Danny Trejo has made a nice little film career for himself with the Machete films. Those are enjoyable flicks that move fast and are full of ridiculous action and story it is hard not to like them. Trejo continues what I am coining Mexsploitation films, with Bad Ass. The film is based off of the actions of that crazy old coot that beat down a guy on a public bus in Oakland some years ago. The movie has all of the elements of the Blaxploitation genre as it relates to race, sex, humor and action. The big problem with this movie though is that it gets increasingly difficult to figure out what is supposed to be funny if any of it is supposed to be funny at all. The action and plot get so ridiculous you are waiting for a wink from Trejo. You get some near misses but nothing definitive. Don’t get me wrong, the movie is fun and move at a brisk pace. It never seems to take itself too seriously, I guess but again that is the overall problem. -Jeremy

Jeremy’s One Paragraph Movie Review: Death Race 3: Inferno (2012)

DR3-dvdFifteen minutes or so in to this flick a fist fight breaks out inside an African mountain. Why? Because why the fuck not? In case that wasn’t ridiculous enough you get a blowtorch fight between scantily clad women in the same mountain. What does this have to do with car racing? Well, nothing really but then not much makes a lot of sense in this movie. The third movie in the Death Race, um, franchise moves the action to Africa as a new corporate owner, Dougray Scott (guy who passed on Wolverine), attempts to franchise Death Race globally. Yup, there is your plot. Even Ving Rhames barely shows up in this one. Of course he does so not sure if that makes it worse for him. The movie isn’t particularly good but it does provide a lot of vroom sounds and excuses to blow up just about everything. -Jeremy

Jeremy’s One Paragraph Movie Review: Death Race 2 (2010)

death-race-2The remake of Death Race is a lot of fun. It may not be the greatest flick but it is pure Statham. Death Race 2 is actually a prequel as it deals with the origin of Frankenstein and just how he came to be. Ving Rhames’ stature continues its decline as he has a small part as the evil misogynistic corporate man. Joan Allen has been replaced by The Walking Dead’s own Lauren Cohan as evil female corporate lady. This certainly won’t be at the top of her resume. The film is total camp and if it was made in the 70’s we may possibly be hailing it as grindhouse magic.  -Jeremy

Movie news: Gorgeous George biopic, DDP/Danny Trejo flick expected

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"Read my interview or I'll kill you."

What a weird (but awesome) place to find professional wrestling information: According to The AV Club, WWE Films is slated to film a biopic on recently inducted WWE Hall of Famer Gorgeous George, based on the book “Gorgeous George: The Outrageous Bad-Boy Wrestler Who Created American Popular Culture.”

The picture breaks McMahon’s odd, self-imposed code of never doing a film about wrestlers, an exception he made because of the unique historical impact George had—not only within the world of professional wrestling (which borrowed all of his flamboyance and outsized theatricality, and the idea that audiences love rooting against a bad guy almost more than rooting for the good guy), but well beyond it. Both Muhammad Ali and James Brown said that they based their boastful self-promotion on George, while a chance meeting with Bob Dylan (which he later wrote about in The Chronicles) gave the young singer “all the recognition and encouragement I would need for years.”

A big congrats to Vince & Co. for finally embracing pro wrestling history pre-Bruno Sammartino (or pre-Hulk Hogan, for that matter.)

Also according to The AV Club, Danny Trejo (soon to be of “Machete” fame, as well as almost 200 other roles) is set to star in “Vengeance,” a movie that takes its cue from the Charles Bronson “Death Wish” series, where Trejo plays a vigilante whose wife and kids were killed and who goes on a murderous rampage. And Diamond Dallas Page is in it!

DT: Remember I told you that I love Charles Bronson? Charles Bronson was doing movies called Death Wish, where they kill his family and he becomes a vigilante. That is basically the storyline: They kill my wife and daughter, and I take revenge, vengeance, on criminals. I kill people that are jaywalking.

AVC: Really? Is it a comedy?

DT: No, no, no. It’s a really serious vigilante flick.

AVC: And 50 Cent and Jason Mewes are in it?

DT: 50 Cent, Jason Mewes, Diamond Dallas Page, Donal Logue, Baby Bash, Tech Nine, Houston Alexander, and Rashad Evans. We’ve got some monsters in it.

So yeah, good for Diamond Dallas Page, who worked with Trejo on the Rob Zombie film “The Devil’s Rejects.” The Trejo interview is really good, and it makes me wonder if meeting DDP would turn the new old softy from a life of boxing to a routine of Yoga for Regular Guys. -Eric

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