#ROH IS The Worst Part XI

manchester-arena-wrestlingOkay, Ring of Honor would never play an arena this size but it’s what I got when I typed in “arena floor plan wrestling” into Google. I had to go that route after “DuBurns Arena Floor plan” didn’t come up with anything useful. DuBurns Arena has no page on Wikipedia. The best I can do is the Coppermine Restaurant at Du Burns Arena on Facebook. They record at a fancy spot. Woof. The floor plan above will work as a nice tool though to describe what Ring of Honor did wrong now. They did do something right though. But let’s save the good news for after the bad news. I’m that kind of guy.

ROH was back in Du Burns Arena to tape some episodes. Normally, their floor plan would have their walk way through areas H and J then the entrance ramp would be at the large aisle between sections 116 & 117. The set up made it looks pretty full for an arena of well, probably no more than 3,000 since that was the size of the place they played here in Columbus. ROH decided to switch it up for the big match up between Matt Hardy and Jay Briscoe. They placed the entrance ramp in section 114 with a very short aisle to the ring. I have a problem with my example now because it doesn’t convey the tightness of the length of the aisle. Just pretend that the second deck isn’t there and section 114 is about half the size. The WWE has a similar set up when they go to Madison Square Garden. I don’t like that set up but it doesn’t bother me for one reason that became glaringly obvious when ROH used camera angles that weren’t the hard camera. The WWE packs MSG full so no matter what angle they film from, it’s a packed house. For whatever reason, ROH used more non-hard camera angle shots than I can remember in any other broadcast. The main problem as you can guess by now was that the crowd in sections 109-119 was sparse at best. So ROH did it’s best to point out that an arena that is likely in the 3,000 seat area was not full. Even TNA isn’t this stupid. To compound the problems, it seemed that they acknowledged this problem by filming really close up to the wrestlers to minimize the amount of crowd seen. I have close up filming in movies and wrestling because you lose context. ROH is the worst.

The good news? Even though ROH was dumb enough to leave their title belt on Jay Briscoe who was leaving the company (dumb) but they did two smart things. They didn’t put the strap around Fat Hardy’s waist. The other upside was that SCUM beat down Mark & Jay Briscoe before they were booted from the company. TNA wasn’t smart enough to with DOC recently so we need to give ROH an “Atta boy” pet every now and again. -Kevin

Stunt Granny Audio #211

IdiotsEverywhere

Jeremy and Kevin are back and they’re talking about idiots, idiots everywhere. The biggest idiot may be in Kevin’s office. Kevin lays out his evidence and would like to know if you know anyone that competes in his utter lack of knowledge. They move on to talk about the idiots in the WWE. Why do they feel the need to have the heels lose all of the time? Does Eve Torres winning count as a heel victory? How about Vickie Guerrero? Jeremy took issue with Kevin not liking Brad Maddox. What excuse for poor writing did Kevin come up with? Somehow, the guys migrate to talking about the idiots that run TNA. What similarities do their idiots have with the WWE idiots? What would help Aces & Eights? Who didn’t know DOC stood for Director of Chaos? How does that dovetail with his wrestling viewing habits? Jeremy & Kevin do talk about the idiots running ROH. Not for long as they ping pong between TNA & the WWE. Could both companies learn from critically acclaimed television these days? Could they learn from children’s television? What lessons do they think the wrestling companies can learn? Join them in this audio journey.

Stunt Granny Audio Show #211

Kevin’s Blog: A Day Late & A Dollar Short Review of @ImpactWrestling

Destination

I figured since Final Destination is on Sunday, I may as well do a de facto preview. I’ve got a couple of hours before I go out drinking with my buddy who is in town from Pittsburgh.

Kazarian starts off by call us choads. You deserve the shit you’re given. Bobby Roode cuts a fair enough program but I’m not sure why he’d put this double albatross around his neck. Christopher Daniels is OK at being insincere but I’m just so tired of this feud. AJ Styles is cutting an OK promo too. Still bored. Jeff Hardy & James Storm save Styles who picked a bad fight. They replay Austin Aries, Bully Ray & Hulk Hogan. Aries gets to cut the promo. He’s pushed buttons and wants to push more. I guess he likes video games.

I only looked at the headlines on Dot Net this morning so I know someone debuted or came back tonight. I also know that there’s a new TV Champion. Considering it’s a one on one match, the outcome between Samoa Joe and Devon is pretty easy. The match was cheap. Earl is distracted by a hot blonde. I guess that’s what happens since Madison Rayne left. DOC nails Samoa Joe with a hammer. Devon covers for the win. Brooke Hogan is happy about a contract delivery. Hmm, I’m guessing this is the mystery person.

I’m not shocked that they’re continuing this dumb angle with D’Lo Brown and Al Snow. They’re cool but a match is happening between them, right? Mickie James comes out in a dress. She made a pact to win the Knockouts Champion. Well, duh. Tara interrupts to brag about Jesse. Velvet Sky comes out. Three terrible promos in a row. Robbie E is freaking out about paying his insurance. Robbie T is a smart sophisticated European so he knows how to work an iPad. Why did I choose to review this show again?

That was their big promo before wrestling Chavo Guerrero & Hernandez. I don’t care about this match. Shocking, isn’t it? The Mexicans who were both born in the US take on Joey Ryan & Matt Morgan on Sunday. I’m sure Morgan is thinking it was a great idea to re-sign with TNA. Hernandez didn’t injure Robbie T. Chavo wins with the Frog Splash. Joey Ryan interrupts. Morgan attacks from behind. Big Morgan & Big Organ. I’m just angry now. Nothing gets better when Devon acts like he enjoys the strippers “going lesbian”.

Garrett Bischoff & Wes Brisco have Kurt Angle‘s back. I could like the group if Garrett & Brisco could act at all. Chavo barks all day little doggy while Hernandez tries to look tough. They cut the promo short. Jimminy Cricket.

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Kevin’s Blog: A Day Late & A Dollar Short Review of @ImpactWrestling

It’s been a Kevin heavy week with me attending Raw, actually getting to Prime Wrestling and now having a Friday devoid of my girl I get to do more reviews. TNA has gotten the short end of the stick recently around these parts. So even though I watched a little of it last night, I’m starting fresh for this review.

I didn’t hear much of this James Storm promo last night because Baby Momma Drama wouldn’t stop talking. I didn’t miss much. Not bad but no meat to it. Bobby Roode interrupts. He has much more meat on his end. I like it. I like it even more after their scuffle and him talking Storm into a dumb match. Hulk Hogan talks about AJ Styles’s frustration. Hogan points out that he’s his own worst enemy. So it was his idea to put him into a never ending feud that ended abruptly and was terrible 75% of the time for the last year? I don’t think so.

DOC gets to defend himself. He points out all of the beatings he’s been dishing out. Devon picks someone by dart. I’d whoop his ass in Cricket. Kid Kash gets a shot at the TV Title because he’s on the roster. Not sure the last time I saw him win. RVD is doing the selling early. This match has been terrible. Both of them look at fault for it. RVD with the frog splash. Yawn. Eric Young is talking up his show, except for not using the name. ODB is still horny.  The whole act has lost some momentum.

Kurt Angle talks to Garrett and whoever the other guy is. I watch every week. Wes evidently. No wonder I don’t remember it. Jesse is taking on Young. The ladies are at ring side. EY pays too much attention to ODB whooping on Tara. Jesse catches him with a super stunner for the win.

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