Stunt Granny Audio- TNA Roster Game 2011

This isn't accurate but it isn't any better.

Nearly a year to the day Stunt Granny brings back everyone’s favorite show. Yes it is time for the TNA roster game. For the uninitiated the entire crew gets together and plays booker and the almighty. Who stays? Who goes? Why keep Shannon Moore for any reason? Who is considered an asset in the eyes of some and absolute garbage in the eyes of others? Why go through all of this? Why is Eric squirming for the last fifteen minutes? Why do the guys drag it out much longer than necessary? Well the answer is simple a retarded dog with no education is smarter than the decision makers in TNA. To prove this fact a bunch of assholes will all talk over each other to make jokes at Dixie Carter and her merry pack of goons’ expense. So join in the audio goodness.

Stunt Granny Audio Show- TNA Roster Game 2011

Past TNA Roster shows

TNA ROSTER GAME 2010

TNA ROSTER GAME 2099 Part 1

TNA ROSTER GAME 2009 Part 2

Stunt Granny Big 11 Week Ending 3/26/11

1. Abdullah the Butcher – I told a co-worker for the first time since I started here that I’m a pro wrestling fan. Of course he wanted to make sure I knew it was fake, but then he knowingly talked about wrestlers using pieces of razor blades to cut themselves during matches. I told him about Abdullah the Butcher and the scar tissue into which he can insert a quarter. I thought my co-worker was gonna puke. – Eric

2. The Miz – Let’s see how many times he ends up on the list this week. The Miz’s appearance on “Conan” was the stuff televisions were made for. Not too many people could verbally get the better of Conan O’Brien, but Miz unabashedly talked over the host, then gave him the nickname “Ginga Ninja” and the catchphrase, “Step into my dojo, mofo!” I really hope it sticks. – Eric

3. Bret Hart – The Hitman relieved himself of the old “HitmanBretShart” Twitter handle but kept up the juvenile, one-sided war of words with Hulk Hogan, particularly via Twitpic (or YFrog, or whatever, who cares), portraying Hogan as a withered-up old hanger-on, to the enjoyment of a few thousand smelly Internet nerds. Meanwhile, Hogan made a cameo on “American Idol,” still one of TV’s biggest rated shows. In other words, fuck you, Bret Hart. – Eric

4. TNA Impact – I swear I am trying to watch this show but damn they make it difficult. This is the exact train of events of trying to watch this week: I went to the DVR menu. I chose Impact. I fast forwarded thru the end of Gangland. I stopped when I saw Ken Anderson. I started getting annoyed at the opening. I fast forwarded until I saw a marker board in the ring. I got more annoyed. I shut it off after four minutes of viewing. I then got a text from Dusty. It wasn’t positive. How the hell were we watching at the same time when we are in different time zones anyway? – Jeremy

5. Michael Cole – Cole is the greatest heel in wrestling. He would make a great character in WWE comics. I mean he already has his own hideout in the Cole Mine as well as a loyal henchman. – Jeremy

6. Eddie Edwards – He won the Ring Of Honor title. He defeated Roderick Strong. Past champions in ROH include CM Punk, Samoa Joe and Homicide. We once met Homicide in Orlando, which is the home of Walt Disney World and Universal Studios.  We were trying to drunkenly speak with Cheerleader Melissa. She was a very nice person but her friend was annoyed. I bet if she knew who we were it would  have had a much more positive effect on her. By the way,  I used these names so I can tag them without a hint of guilt for hits for the site. – Jeremy

7. Kurt Angle – As Eric posted earlier today, Angle was arrested today in North Dakota when he couldn’t keep his car on the road. Police smelled alcohol on him and he was done for. Does TNA have the least professional locker room in wrestling history? There just seems to be no discipline or personal responsibility whatsoever there. – Dusty

8. Kurt Angle’s mugshot – It’s as if he’s simply taking a fan photo on a sunny afternoon.

9. Ian Rotten – Recently ethered into oblivion on some blog talk radio show by a 40 year old weirdo. I experienced this audio in the following way: The two idiots are yelling at each other. I am drowsy. I fall asleep. I wake up. The two idiots are still yelling at each other, now in harsher tone. Ian is basically every lowest common denominator wrestling fan ever, separated only by the fact that he actually got to run his own shows. So kudos for that. – Dusty

10. WWE’s partnership with Kmart – I guess WWE figures before all the Kmarts in the world are driven out of business by the existence of Walmart and the fact that they are crummy, dirty stores, they better form a partnership with them to promote their house shows. Soon enough, though, Ian Rotten will be hosting IWA MS shows on the parking lots of each and every one of these fine retail stores. – Dusty

11. TNA’s Spring Cleaning Sale – Don West is the fucking fucking man.

Dusty

Happy birthday, pro wrestlers! (June 20-30)

don west

Happy birthday, indeed.

I’ve been slacking on my wrestlers’ birthdays posts, so here’s 11 days worth, starting with the greatest pitchman in recent memory!

June 20: Don West (Donald West, 47)

June 26: Matt Striker (Matthew Kaye, 36)

June 27: Triple H (Paul Michael Levesque McMahon Helmsley, 41)

June 29: Serena (Serena Deeb, 24)

June 30: Cody Rhodes (Cody Runnels, 25)
June 30: Alicia Fox (Victoria Crawford, 24)

Wow, it’s really kinda sad that we’ve wanted a 41-year-old man out of the main-event picture for almost 10 years now. -Eric

Don West: Still The Best Part Of TNA

TNA is run by braindead boneheads and as such took Don West off television, thus depriving their loyal fans of absolute greatness. Thank God they didn’t fire him outright, because he’s still the best part of TNA. This video is proof. Is Jeff Hardy a Mummy-riding freak? Don West knows the truth. – Dusty

Spike TV Promises Moar TNA!!!; Hope For Don West Fans

This is the type of magic people have come to expect from TNA. Sadly, it may never be again.

This is the type of magic people have come to expect from TNA. Sadly, it may never be again.

Just, here is the press release:

SPIKE TV AND TNA WRESTLING EXTEND PARTNERSHIP THROUGH 2012

Deal Includes New Weekly Installments Of “TNA: iMPACT!” And The Addition Of New Original Series Of Specials

Spike TV and Total Nonstop Action (TNA) Wrestling have agreed to a new, three-year extension of their partnership, it was announced jointly today by Kevin Kay, President, Spike TV and Dixie Carter, President of TNA Entertainment.

The deal, which begins October 1, 2009, includes three new years of TNA’s weekly “iMPACT!” show as well as the addition of a new original series of one-hour specials. Each special (title TBD) will feature the biggest personalities and highlight some the greatest and awe-inspiring bouts in the history of TNA, many of them never before seen on basic cable. TNA Entertainment will produce 10 one-hour installments.

“TNA: iMPACT!” is coming off its highest-rated and most-watched quarter on Spike TV. During 2Q09, more than 1.8 million viewers on average tuned in to “TNA: iMPACT!” on Spike each week. Overall, “TNA: iMPACT!” saw an impressive 31% overall growth compared to YAGO, with double digit increases in the key demographics of M18-49 (+33%) and P18-49 (+40).*

“With the tremendous success and record ratings we have achieved over the past three years, we are very happy to continue to have Spike TV as TNA Wrestling’s partner,” said Carter. “We are excited to continue our relationship with the fantastic team that has supported TNA from the very beginning, and look forward to even greater success with all of our TNA programming on Spike TV.”

“TNA Wrestling has consistently delivered strong ratings in key male demographics and has continually grown its weekly audience. In the past year alone, “iMPACT!” has seen a remarkable increase of 30% in overall growth,” said Kay. “We are excited to not only continue but also expand our relationship with the world’s fastest growing wrestling organization.”

Cross The Line to TNA Wrestling, the most innovative experience in professional wrestling today. Watch “TNA iMPACT!” every Thursday night (9:00-11:00 PM, ET/PT) only on Spike TV. TNA Entertainment, LLC is a privately held company headquartered in Nashville, Tenn.

Spike TV is available in 98 million homes and is a division of MTV Networks. A unit of Viacom (NYSE: VIA, VIA.B), MTV Networks is one of the world’s leading creators of programming and content across all media platforms. Spike TV’s Internet address is http://www.spike.com and for up-to-the-minute and archival press information and photographs, visit Spike TV’s press site at http://www.spike.com/press/.

The only way I’m okay with this is if Don West is on the new television program. To paraphrase Austin Idol (everyone should paraphrase Austin Idol): 98 million homes. 3 people per home. 294 million people clamoring for Don West to be TNA’s announcer. Make it happen. – Dusty

TNA is death

Kiss this greatness goodbye, you slags.

Kiss this greatness goodbye, you slags.

According to our deal close personal long time friends at the Figure Four Weekly Online site (http://www.f4wonline.com/content/view/10306/ if you have an account with them), TNA has just given Don West the ol’ heave ho.

This is a company that not only continues to employ a pill popping alcoholic stalker, but has chosen to keep that person as its World Heavyweight Champion in spite of a recent arrest. Now, I had been getting into TNA more recently, and one of the main reasons was because of Don West’s awesome commentary. I say this with no amount of hyperbole, Don West is the best announcer in professional wrestling right now. WWE can’t pick him up soon enough for my tastes.

On the bright side, we can now look forward to Tazzz telling us all about Joey Numbahs and cahs and yahhts and all kinds of stupid Brooklyn accent nonsense on Thursday nights from now on. I want to puke. – Dusty

Don West Fired

Ha Ha, Gotcha Bitches

Ha Ha, Gotcha Bitches

Prowrestling.net is reporting that TNA color announcer Don West has lost his radio gig in Nashville, TN. Don had a sports show on WNSR AM. I actually caught some of his shows when we take our annual trips to Nashville for a Red Wings game and the show really wasn’t bad. I would love to make a joke about it but Don had a good thing going there. This kind of sucks since Don is horrible at color commentating for TNA but is decent on the radio. Below is an e-mail from WNSR AM’s GM I found on a message board so take this with a grain of salt.  -Jeremy

Let me start off by saying that Don and crew are great guys and have done an outstanding job for WNSR. This was one of the toughest decisions I’ve had to make since we started WNSR. It was not one I wanted to make. The economic downturn in the last several months has put us into a position to have to make cuts. The only option we had was to go to Sporting News, our national network. Sporting news had been repeating the 9 to Noon Tim Brando show again from Noon to 3. That was discontinued September first and the Two Live Stews show was added. Sometimes you are placed in a situation you don’t like and have little control over, this was one of those times. Don and crew remain friends and we know they will be fine. If at some point in the future things turn around, we would love to have Don and crew back. Thank you for listening and being a WNSR supported.

Ted Johnson

VP/GM

WNSR/WNTC SportsRadio

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