Total Divas – Season 2 – Cabo – She Said (He Edited)

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givesugar.com

Having watched two back to back episodes of Total Diva’s, I sit here typing with a terrible headache. Should I attribute it to having to cram in two Total Diva shows in two days? As much as I’d like to say, yes, I’ll have to say, no, and try to pull my thoughts together to get through this review.

We’ve all been to bachelor / bachelorette parties, but in no way have I been to a swanky bachelorette party in Cabo San Lucas, MX. Wow! This episode focused on Brie’s bachelorette party and a bit about Trinity. We’ll start with Trinity first.

At the end of Red and Gold, we saw Trinity get injured in the ring. Cabo starts off with that same segment. Trinity doing her thing in the ring and then getting kneed in the eye. Trinity finishes the match and wins. Trinity heads straight to the back to the doctor who tells her she needs to go to a specialist. We see some gruesome photos of Trinity’s eye and a supportive and sympathetic Jon. Trinity wears an eye patch but after a few days, she goes back into the doctor who tells her that a bone is broken and there is a lot of fat around her eye, but that it should heal in 2-3 weeks. Trinity is obviously excited as she is in the height of her career and wants that Title belt.

Summer Rae approaches Eva Marie about Cabo. Since I can never understand what Summer Rae says as she can’t seem to open her mouth all the way to enunciate words, I’m not sure if she asked Eva if she was going to Cabo or if she was invited and wanted to know if Eva was going. Either way, Eva tells her that she will have all the fun for Summer as Summer has burned way too many bridges. Eva walks away and hilariously enough, Summer asks a random girl standing there if she is going to Cabo then walks away.

It’s Brie-mode time. Getting off the plane, there is a bar for ‘soda’s to go’ which Nattie, Nikki and Brie take advantage of. (Kevin’s Edit: How dare you forget they were called road sodas! Opie would be disappointed.) Driving up to the rental for the bachelorette party, Nattie starts talking about swimming with dolphins, board games and building a sand castle. I’d have to say, that all sounds fun to me, but alas, the girls say ‘NO”, it’s Briemode and get your drink on. The rental is stunning. So open and beautiful, each Diva has their own room. That is pretty swanky, along with a gorgeous pool that overlooks the ocean. Personal servants bring them all the drinks they want which is pretty awesome. You have a scene of scantily placed bikini’s and some ass slapping, which was weird for me to watch, but I’m sure the guys out there were wiping drool from their faces. (Kevin’s Edit: Other guys will need to speak up. I’m not exactly a big fan looks wise of  these Divas.)

Nattie and Nikki are out in the pool alone and talking about John and how Nattie bets her Divaship on John asking her to marry him. Nikki blurts out that she was married before. This obviously throws Nattie and we find out that at age 20 Nikkie married her high school sweetheart in Vegas with Elvis. They were married 3 years and she said she got an annulment. Brie comes out and gets slightly upset because she is the only one who knew about the marriage and now Nattie knows, and we all know Nattie can’t keep a secret. (Kevin’s Edit: Everyone has that friend who can’t keep their yapper shut. Nattie has nothing of interest to tell about herself so she needs to gossip.)

The party continues into the night and we see Eva Marie trying to have a good time, but also looking a bit stressed. We find out that Eva Marie is a recovering Alcoholic and right before she got hired to the WWE she ‘fell off’ the wagon. She tries to hide the fact she isn’t drinking, but it eventually becomes way too much and she ends up leaving the group upset and going home. Ariane tries to stop her but Eva just tells her she doesn’t feel good and is going back to the villa.

The next morning Eva comes clean and tells the girls that she is a recovering alcoholic and she can’t have just 1 drink. The girls support Eva and it becomes an emotional circle of Nattie, Brie, Nikki, Ariane and Eva Marie sharing their emotions and their issues. I actually felt it was quite touching and definitely took away from the Brie-mode. It was a slight buzz kill, but it seemed like the girls didn’t mind. (Kevin’s Edit: I have no idea why she struggled with telling them especially in a setting you’re supposed to get hammered in.) I did have to laugh though when Nikki told Eva that the ones you hate the most are the ones that become your best friends, I don’t think so, but whatever, she’s a Diva.

We end the Brie-mode with swimming with the dolphins. Nattie got what she wanted and was very happy. I actually thought that seemed like a cool idea. (Kevin’s Edit: I would be down for swimming with dolphins. It’d be way more fun to be in a shark cage though.)

At the end of the episode, Nikki decides to tell her family that she was married before. Her father is OK with it. I found it odd he was there as I thought they didn’t like their dad? (Kevin’s Edit: He was there? Shows you how much I was paying attention. They didn’t like him though.) And her mom was a bit surprised after how close they are that Nikki didn’t confide in her. Nikki’s brother went off though. He said he was really pissed and stormed off. I didn’t understand his anger as he isn’t the one who was married and divorced and he also should be supportive and not a child. That entire scene was stupid. Nikki leaves as she feels unwanted in her brother’s home and is now worried what John will say when she tells him. (Kevin’s Edit: Are we sure the brother isn’t gay after that reaction?)

We see in the preview that it’s time for Brie to get married, it’s Wrestlemania, and it concludes with Nikki’s brother telling John that Nikki was married before. Oh boy, part 1 of 2 of the season finale. Maybe I’ll have to write one review for the season finale as I find TV is getting a bit more crazy with making a 2 part season finale, what happened to the cliffhangers from back in the day! (Kevin’s Edit: I promised on big reviews so let’s just do it that way.) – M & (Kevin)

Total Divas – Season 2 – Episode 7 – She Said (He Edited)

Steve Thoms - Field of Red and Gold - nonprints.com

Steve Thoms – Field of Red and Gold – nonprints.com

I have to say, this episode actually had some character to it and felt like some of the show wasn’t scripted. But alas, I’m sure I’m wrong about that. I have found it interesting that they pick and choose the shows characters on who is going to be on each week. Before when the show first started, everyone was on the show at the same time with special brunches and lunches, but now it’s like they are deciding who is going to have the bigger story line or most on camera time, why would they not though since it is a WWE production and half the time wrestlers go missing for weeks and then return all of a sudden. (Kevin’s Edit: I can’t say I had thought about the shift in focus but she’s right on both points. It happens on the regular roster too. Why not make Total Divas the same way?)

Anyway, this past episode focused on Nattie, Brie, Nikki, Summer Rae, Eva Marie and Ariane. Hmm, who should I start with first? It’s all a train wreck, so I’ll start with the most annoying in this episode which was Ariane. Girl Bye! Is all I want to say to this horrendous story line. So Ariane has a single coming out called Bye Bye. She wants free publicity so her and her man, Vincent drive to a paparazzi area to get photographed. After leaving the dog in the car and remembering a short time later that the tiny dog was in the car, they were on their way for free publicity. But alas, Kim Kardashian ruined the free publicity by being in a restaurant near by. Ariane pulls out the ‘friend’ card and behind Vincent’s back, calls Ray J. He is a singer and had a terrible dating show on VH1 at some point. (Kevin’s Edit: I’m trying to figure out if my woman doesn’t know about the Ray J and Kardashian sex tapes or not. I mean, I wouldn’t know him except for that so she gave me more information than I had.) Ariane and Ray J go to work out so the paparazzi can take lots of pictures. This scene was terrible as they were putting them in all kinds of awkward positions pretending to ‘wrestle’ in the gym and having an MMA trainer. Can the WWE think of anything more stupid? So the pictures get posted, they ask about her and Ray J, but he’s just a friend of the family, and Vincent gets all pissed off. But alas, at the end of every segment, they are OK after Ariane apologizes at her singles party for Bye Bye. (Kevin’s Edit: I agree with her analysis. Ariane is the most unlikeable character on this show. She does as little as possible and expects attention for nothing. There’s a reason they didn’t play the song much during the show.)

I in no way would have ever thought Nattie was a talented painter. Ha! Nattie and TJ killed me this episode. Nattie painted a picture of John and Nikki. She is straddling John in the painting. When Nikki takes the painting out of the box with Brie on the phone, she says “I’m wearing a diaper and I have a claw for a hand”. Nikki decides to hide the painting but when Nattie comes over to visit, Brie informs Nikki she has to put it out on display. Nikki takes it out of the closet and puts it out for her. Nattie is thrilled the painting is out and how pretty the frame matches their interior of the home. I was just laughing. (Kevin’s Edit: It was strange to me that the frame of the picture did fit in with the decor Nikki put it near. I don’t like gold unless it’s the yellow (Pirates/Steelers) or Vegas (Pens) variety.) So Nattie decides she wants to do something just as personal for Brie and Daniel’s wedding present and hand deliver it. So we get a glimpse of Nattie working on Brie and Daniel’s wedding portrait with dog included. TJ comes into the room and without saying it, says he doesn’t want anything to do with the painting, it’s all Nattie. She is so excited about the painting and fixes Daniel’s nose, giving it more texture. (Kevin’s Edit: Tyson Kidd showed personality for the first time ever.)

TJ makes Nattie carry the painting to the car as he again reiterates, he wants nothing to do with the painting. Predictable, their full sized has been changed to an economy car. (Kevin’s Edit: I had this happen recently or else I’d scream set up. I had a full size become a compact and a compact become a full size. Too bad we had the compact with four people.) The painting obviously doesn’t fit. Nattie decides that the stadium isn’t far, so they can just tie it to the roof with her panty hose, work pants and tape. Ha, ha, ha. And yes, as predicted, the painting flies off the car into traffic. They tie it again to the car and take off. Nattie approaches Daniel and Brie and takes the painting out of the box. Brie and Daniel have no idea what to say and Nattie continues to rave about the imported frame while TJ just stands there. When Nattie leaves, Daniel and Brie both agree to not hang the painting. Daniel comments that his nose looks like a male body part. (Kevin’s Edit: I’m not as prim and proper as her. They look like balls, if you like to manscape.) Brie doesn’t look anything like Brie. Poor Nattie. You can tell stuff like that takes a lot of time, but I know, I would never paint something like that and give it to someone. I know they say that it’s the personal factor that counts, but sometimes you just need to give a gift card instead. (Kevin’s Edit: She’s not even a good painter. Nattie, take some lessons or stop.)

Our final Divas are Eva Marie and Summer Rae. So the WWE wants to give Eva and Summer a chance to be a tag team and it is christened Red and Gold. They love it and decide to work out together to try out moves and a routine. Eva does comment that she got pulled out of NXT faster and that Summer has a lot more experience. This is noted when they begin working on their routine and Summer gets fed up because Eva acts like she has no idea what she is doing. I just wonder if she really has no clue or if it’s another ploy by the WWE to get us to think it’s a good story line. (Kevin’s Edit: Eva is a terrible wrestler. She was booked with a “We can get free advertising from Maxim” rocket attached to her back. The smart plan would have been to make her a valet but that’s just for Lana.) Eva looked like she was trying to not know, but it all just seemed a bit awkward. Summer Rae gets pissed and Eva says she just doesn’t have much time, which throws Summer into saying she is more busy than Eva. So the night of the match comes and Summer runs to Mark and tells him that she doesn’t think Eva is ready so he adds a 3rd into the tag team match. In the interim, Brie has told Eva to watch out for Summer because it’s all about Summer and stepping on those to get to the top. Touche! (Kevin’s Edit: Summer has been unlikeable until this moment. You shouldn’t want to team with someone who is that bad. Why the WWE thought this idea was a good one will remain either a mystery or a way to create this storyline for the show.)

The match comes and they have the big girl that looks like a man with them, I think Tamina? Sorry, can’t remember her name. (Kevin’s Edit: You’ve heard it from me enough. Now we just need to get the Snuka part in there.) And Summer only tags in Tamina and never Eva. Eva has her hand out there trying to get into the match and Summer never lets her in. The match finally ends with Nikki, Nattie and Brie winning. After the match Brie approaches Summer and she tells Brie that Eva just isn’t good enough and doesn’t want to look bad. Brie runs and tells Eva and Tamina tells Eva that she has to stick up for herself and not let Summer run all over her. Eva Marie confronts Summer and Eva informs Summer it’s not the Summer Rae show and she is no longer in her corner and Summer Rae will now be 100% alone. (Kevin’s Edit: This part is where I start calling Bravo Sierra. Six women went to the ring without going over what was going to happen in the match? Try to sell me a different lie.)

At the conclusion of this episode we see Trinity’s injury in the ring and her being escorted out by the doctor with all the Diva’s standing there wanting to know what has happened.

So, you know what the next write up will be about. Trinity. Will it be good? Will Nattie decide to make a painting for Trinity at the height of her career? Will Summer Rae be able to make it on her own, or will she turn to Fandango for comfort? I’m sure none of this will happen as it will be another scripted show and a lot more brain cells dying. Thank goodness I saw a Season Finale for Diva’s the other night. But with my luck, I’ll still be reviewing these shows when the next season starts. HA! – M & (Kevin)

#TotalDivas – She Said (He Edited) Episode 5

whipped-cream-cartoonFamily. That’s what this episode brushed on this week as Nattie and TJ went to their home town (Kevin’s Edit: Of CALGARY…ALBERTA…CANADA) for a WWE episode. Not only were they in their hometown for WWE but it was Nattie’s birthday. I can’t even emphasize the annoyance of how many times Nattie reminded us it was her birthday, 15 maybe 20 times in a 45 minute show. It got to a point that I thought, enough already! (KE: That was about 14 minutes into the show. Shut up Nattie, we know.) We already know it’s your birthday. But the real kicker was TJ’s mom. Family. Some family is great to have around, other family, maybe not so much. I think what it really boils down to is that TJ’s family, in no way, likes Nattie and it definitely showed in this episode.

So the episode starts off with TJ’s mom calling to let them know she would like them to stay with her when they come to town. Nattie immediately says no. Apparently TJ’s mom has a tiny 1 bedroom house and a King Size bed. Nattie will have to sleep in the same bed with TJ’s mom since she doesn’t believe they should sleep together in her home since they aren’t married. I understand her house her rules, (as I follow the same rule when I go to Kevin’s parents) but sharing a bed w/TJ’s mom, totally not cool at all. (KE: At least you don’t have to sleep with my mom. You get your very own bed lady.) So they get the hotel room and as soon as they are there, TJ’s mom calls and he leaves Nattie at the hotel alone and goes to stay with his mom. OMG! I was floored. Can you say Momma’s boy! After last week’s episode w/this guy and this week’s, I don’t see why she doesn’t dump his sorry ass!

The whole trip Nattie informs us it’s her birthday and much to Nattie’s distaste, TJ never tells her until they are walking out the door of her hotel that they are spending time with his family. I LOVED her look when they went to lunch with TJ, his mom and sister. (Scary!) Anyway, his sister informed them they should see a pre-wedding counselor and when bringing up kids, TJ’s mom made it very clear, they didn’t need to talk about that. We find out that TJ’s mom has been making him hot chocolate with marshmallows, hello, is he 5? They have been spending a lot of time together because family is so important and she looks at Nattie. You can see how angry Nattie is getting and when she tries to quiet TJ, his mom perks up and says ‘don’t ever shush my boy’. (KE: I was at a loss for words. I would have jumped off the cruise ship if my mother and sister acted this way.)

Nattie ends up treating herself (I would too after that lunch) to a spray tan. Though I’m not a fan, she knows the guy that owns it. After a bit of definite flirtation, she leaves with her spray tan for her WWE performance where she loses. After that, TJ picked her up for her ‘special’ birthday dinner, because once again we are reminded it’s her birthday. (KE: I know you’re supposed to remind people of the situation but this was overkill central.) TJ informs her they are having a nice birthday dinner at his sisters. At this point Nattie is fuming mad and even though I don’t like her temper tantrums, I totally believe it was called for. She informs him she is not going to his sisters for dinner and will just stay in her hotel room. Which she did not, because in the next scene she is at dinner with the guy from the spray tan. (KE: He reminded me of a tall Mike Mondo. Or Heidenreich but not quite as ugly.)  He informs her that she is a princess and she should be treated like one and that she should dump TJ…leaving the spot open for him. I give kudos to the guy for saying this to her face. As for what her decision would be, it’s a possible cliff hanger, but we all know, 14 years of TJ, annoying as he is, would she ever think to leave him? Doubtful.

We move onto Brie and Nikki. Brie and Nikki’s Dad left them at the age of 15. You would think that he left them at the age of 2 the way Nikki tells the story. At age 15 you should be able to get through your Daddy issues. But I guess not. After a conversation from John, who once again must be reading from the Tao of Pooh, she decides to set up a meeting with her Dad and bring along Brie and their brother. Right when their dad shows up, Nikki says she wishes she was never there. Interesting, since she is the one that set up the reunion. After a boring display of feelings, everyone at the table decided that it takes time to heal a relationship. (KE: The father had a snappy fedora on. I’m not sure why I was surprised they had another sibling.)

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Breaking Down AJ Lee Destroying #TotalDivas

From Facebook.com

From Facebook.com

Jeremy:  so watched that AJ segment again. i don;t understand why they did that. They buried a successful show and in process turned the heel champ face

Kevin:  That segment was awesome & bizarre because of the reasons you listed.
Jeremy:  I understand they want to get a feud going and that makes sense but damn. She didn’t say one incorrect thing. Even heels will distort truth but she didn’t.
Kevin:  I do think that’s the odd thing about the show though. For all of its’ vapidness, it’s one of the better reality shows I’ve watched.
That’s not saying a whole lot but it is giving the ladies a personality.
Jeremy:  I am getting a little worn down. Maybe the formula for those shows is set the players, conflict, resolution. They always wrap up their issues instead of long arcs. So it comes off really scripted. They have personalities then go on TV and have completely different ones.
Kevin:  It’s really tough to keep track of the Funkadactyls because they’re the only ones on the show who have different stage names than their real names.
Jeremy:  The thick one is Trinity? The other one is annoying and too skinny.
Kevin:  That is the other funny thing, I know them by their real names but not their stage names. Ariane is the lighter skinned, smaller one. Trinity is the darker skinned, booty having, Uso dating one.
From WWE.com

From WWE.com

Jeremy:  Cameron? Naomi is Trinity? But look, who cares cause, well, Trinity….delicious.
Kevin:  Yes she is.
Jeremy:  Of the women on the show she is about the only one to even consider dating. Natalie would be fine if you liek pushovers.

Kevin:  Nattie would be fine but you’d end up hearing her say “Put it in my Hart Dungeon” and I’d go limp.
Jeremy:  As long as she meant that ass I am fine with it. I do admire how all of the men on the show are doofuses excpet for the main eventers.
Kevin:  Do you consider Jon Uso a main eventer? He seems fairly likeable. Every other guy though is an idiot.
Jeremy:  He has been OK and no chance he is a main eventer, I just meant Cena and Daniel Bryan
Kevin:  I didn’t think he was in that category but had to ask since he’s been fine. Cena has gotten more time or is more vocal than Bryan so he’s turned me more.
Jeremy:  Cena has been the star for me. he steals every scene. Him essentially telling Nikki to slow down was classic.
then he teaches her Chinese as well as giving her essential life lessons that a nine year old could give.
Kevin:  Kind of says something about their parents that they didn’t get a lesson a nine year old should learn
Jeremy:  Part of me hopes this is all a set up and the end of the season she dumps him or he gives bad advice and it all blows up.
Kevin:  She’s not going to break up with him so option 2 is a possibility.
Jeremy:  Yeah I had those backwards. One other important part of the AJ Lee beat down last night and you touched on it in your Raw review is that the Bellas were terrible. I kept commenting how AJ is right there get to walking broads. Instead all they did was screech from ringside. It was embarrassing.
Kevin:  “Come say it to my face.” How fucking dumb. That’s reserved for when they do the promo from satellite or back stage. Hell, even if AJ would have had Big E standing behind her it would have made more sense. But he wasn’t and she was on the damn stage. I about died from laughter when you texted the comment about them skipping after the beat down.

Jeremy:  Yup no Big E
Kevin:  That isn’t even a half assed response. It’s not a response.
Jeremy:  Have to think that was on purpose as well, she’s standing on her own with it. I am not even giving the Bellas a pass even though the other three just stood there.Show some god damn emotion bitches
Kevin:  At least the baby faces looked disgusted and waved their hands at her as in “Get out of here, we’re wrestlers too” so even though it was a weak response, it was a better than the Bellas.
Jeremy:  I am not sure giving the “talk to the hand” motion really qualifies as better. Nattie had somewhat of a smirk on her face but that was about it.

Kevin:  Anything is better than dancing “ring around the posies” style after getting a verbal beat down. It’s not even a good response but it’s better than dancing.
Jeremy:  That was douche chill inducing. Then it made me think of The Bellas interfering in a match using a duck call or something?
Kevin:  I don’t remember that if it happened. Wasn’t quite sure of the Bellas & Eva Marie’s outfit choices but they did stand out and have some style.
Jeremy:  Well Eva Marie will stand out based on her hair and height. Her heels prevented her from skipping which made that scene just awkward.
Kevin:  I wish I would have re-watched it just to catch that. Eva does look like a stork out there compared to the rest of the lot.

Jeremy:  She looked like a Waterpillar out there with the Bellas dancing all over the place
Kevin:  I may have fallen over laughing from the stupidity of it all if she started doing the sprinkler dance as they danced around her.
Jeremy:  It isn’t exactly her fault but she should have been more prepared. I figure they were having a good life or a healthy cringe during that.,
Kevin:  They all should have been more prepared.
Jeremy:  Isn’t the rule of live entertainment “Always be prepared”? I am still chalking it up to a lack of talent.
Kevin:  Yeah, I’m thinking that’s why the WWE isn’t featuring them. The whole division blows.
Kaitlyn deserves better than the usual scorned woman schtick but I’m pretty sure she’s not the next Trish Stratus.
Jeremy:  I was wondering why AJ and Kaitlin were not on the show. Aksana as well, get the international flavor.
From Fanpop.com

From Fanpop.com

Kevin:  How dare you forget about Rosa! But it makes no sense for them not to use the whole division. Rosa, Tamina & Layla, with a possible late arrival of Summer Rae would have gotten all of the division on the show.
Jeremy:  Oh wow. yeah forgot about her, that cast would have made the show so much better.
Kevin:  Only thing I can think of is that they thought too many “characters” would be on the show if they did the whole division.
 Jeremy:  No I meant excuse the entire first cast outside of Trinity of course. I suppose there is always next season.
Kevin:  The WWE doesn’t like to renew shows that are doing well like NXT so this one will probably get cancelled too.
 Jeremy:  Well the ratings dictate a renewal but it is on E! so may be out of their hands.

Stunt Granny Audio Show #224

wrestling_fan_wedding cakeJeremy & Kevin had a plan, but they didn’t follow it to start the show. Why wouldn’t they start by talking about the marriage of Natalya Neidhart and Tyson Kidd? Maybe because one of the hosts thinks that they were really cousins? Maybe because the other host thinks it’s incest? Is the WWE giving the Divas a proper hype as they prepare to unveil Totally Divas on E! Entertainment? Jeremy & Kevin move back to their plan by talking about CM Punk, Curtis Axel and Paul Heyman. Is CM Punk in the same no man’s land as a baby face like Dolph Ziggler? How do their situations differ? CM Punk and Paul Heyman are doing well in their roles, but how is Curtis Axel doing? How does Brock Lesnar figure into this situation? Would he ever interfere in the Money In The Bank match? The guys stumble back off the beaten path and talk about Kane. Is this latest effort with Daniel Bryan cementing his place in the WWE Hall of Fame? Jeremy & Kevin then tackle the Suicide escapade in Impact Wrestling. Which one of your hosts is too lazy to even read the spoilers for this week’s show? Which one has no idea what really took place on Impact? Can anyone really blame him? How smart is Austin Aries? They finish up the show by talking about the Wyatt Family. What are their names aside from Bray Wyatt? Who are they going to start them off against? Would they make a proper impact against 3MB? Join this two man band for an audio experience.

Stunt Granny Audio Show #224

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