Stunt Granny Audio #260

From breakdanceworld.com

From breakdanceworld.com

After a break from talking to each other, Jeremy & Kevin are back to talk wrestling. Except that they start talking about Jeremy’s receiver and X Box problems. Did Kevin see the commercial that has caused X Box owners problems? Is that how they transitioned to talking about the studio analysts of the World Cup? What makes them different from other commentators on TV? Why did they start adding so many talking heads to College Game Day? Who does Jeremy want to get the boot? Speaking of people getting the boot, there is speculation that Josh Matthews is out of a job with the WWE. Did he ever get a fair shake? How long did he announce Smackdown? Why did Michael Cool take his spot? Do your hosts think he is finally doing a good job? How vanilla has he gotten? Does he even do play by play any more? Why did a Josh Matthews conversation turn into Michael Cole conversation? Kevin moves on to clarify his article about ROH changing world champions from Adam Cole to Michael Elgin. But this clarification turns the conversation into a talk about TNA’s bizarre decision to remove the belt from Eric Young? Why would they do it right before his television appearances for “No Limits” on Animal Planet? What style of booking led to TNA winning at Slammiversary but then dropping the belt at the next Impact Wrestling? Do the guys talk themselves into saying that Eric Young is the best option as champion in TNA? Find out the answer to that question and more when you click on the link below.

@ImpactWrestling – Total Nonsense Analysis

Retro Never Dies by Jazzgin from Hongkiat.com

Retro Never Dies by Jazzgin from Hongkiat.com

I checked Prowrestling.net after coming back from a trip to Altoona for my nephews’ and sister’s birthday which got joined in by Easter. I noticed that the biggest news of the weekend may have been Jim Ross commenting on the possibility of Renee Young going to ESPN. I too like Ross believe that the rumor seems to be coming awful fast. She has enjoyed a quick rise in the WWE, but she still seems a bit fresh to be on ESPN’s radar. I won’t watch ESPN any more if she’s on there so she’ll be missed but I’m sure the WWE can pull someone in just as hot. Too bad they won’t be as competent.

Since that news wasn’t that big. I decided to keep going with the amusement that I found in Impact Wrestling this week. The Eric Young is Daniel Bryan recreation hit another level when Dixie Carter tried to rain on his parade (Cough, Authority, cough) but she is interrupted by Bully Ray who came out to endorse EY. Impact Wrestling evidently considers it to use Bully Ray, who is off to a poor start as a baby face, to mimic John Cena endorsing Bryan. The only problem other than Bully Ray’s overness problem, is that John Cena endorsed Daniel Bryan after he beat him on PPV. EY has not beaten Bully Ray in even on of those TV “PPVs” that Impact Wrestling hosts. Even if you consider Bully Ray’s heel turn a roaring success (I do), he’s not exactly on the level of John Cena. If Bully Ray starts saying he’s the measuring stick of Impact Wrestling, I’ll scream. They continue to miss the finer points of simple logic.

They weren’t done yet. Any of us with half of a brain said, EY just lost to Abyss about two weeks ago. So how else can Impact Wrestling prove that EY is credible? Let’s have him beat Abyss in a Monster’s Ball match. Yuck, stop trying to retroactively prove how good Eric Young is. We know you’re trying to make up for a terrible decision. The other thing that doesn’t help is that it was a gimmick match. The majority of EY’s matches over his entire career have been comedy or gimmick matches. If you want to convince me that EY is a true champion, show me that he can hold a good match. Daniel Bryan wrestled two non-gimmicked matches at Wrestlemania. Another point of logic that Impact Wrestling is missing. – Kevin

Jeremy got an Xbox One. So here is the review: Part 3

xbox-one

Nothing is perfect and the Xbox One is no different. If you missed part one and part two of my review, well, those are hyper-linked so feel free and read those first. The Xbox One has been fun so far and even if this part goes over some of the frustrations it is still a good system that could be great. It is also understandable that every system is going to have a few stumbling points right out of the gate and what Xbox One has experienced can be overcome and most likely will be by spring of 2014.

Microsoft has, much like any other tech company, is pushing their cloud service. The Skydrive is their go to product for storage and it works pretty well and it is fast. Files can be uploaded and downloaded on any number of devices. Since I have a Windows 8 laptop it came standard and the basic storage option is free. It is handy and maybe I am just so used to discs by now but there had to be a better alternative.  Also, the Skydrive does not come equipped on the system. I had to download it and from there it linked to my current account. So for those who do not have a Microsoft account they may not know what the Skydrive is for. There are other solutions for online storage and the app can probably be used but this leads to another negative.

The initial launch of the Xbox One should have had a good deal of apps ready for use. As it stands now there are very little to choose from. Most were already available on the 360 and Windows 8. After so many different apps have become available for Windows 8 it is quite a surprise to see so little available. The standard apps are all there such as Netflix, ESPN, Hulu Plus and Crackle. Sure there are others but nothing compared to the amount currently available on other platforms. I would expect there to be as many ready for the launch but would have settled for at least fifty percent of that.  This will obviously change as the system gains momentum but the same issues that plagued the Windows 8 app release is plaguing the Xbox One. You would think Microsoft would have had that figured out. There is no Flixster, Ultraviolet, UFC, WWE, Instagram or even Facebook for that matter.

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Kevin’s Blog: The English Premier League Review Show

On my Twitter feed Monday I saw a bunch of tweets about a fantastic goal that was scored by Pajtim Kasami during the Fulham at Crystal Palace soccer match. I looked forward to seeing it since I have the English Premier League Review Show set on my DVR. I don’t care if you like soccer or not. If you don’t like the athleticism displayed in the video clip, do me a favor and cease watching sports. After watching the goal last night, I knew I needed to write a post that I’ve wanted to write about this show.

The first order of business is the fact that you never, ever see the announcers. I’d be fine with seeing them as they came in and out of segments but it’s really not necessary. I want to see highlights of the sports that I enjoy. Not Bob Ley. Or Kenny Mayne. Or even a super short skirted Hannah Storm. The EPL Review show delivers by having a voice over guy do the work. He is recognizable and does well transitioning from game to game.

The main point of this article though is the dismal state of highlights show in the US. I used to watch CNN for the highlights at :28 & :58 on the hour. Then I moved on to Sportscenter for a long time. For the last several years, I’ve been looking at recaps online because Sportscenter decided that interviews and behind the scenes pieces were more important. I had some hope that when NBC re-branded Versus into NBCSports that I’d have some luck. I did for about three months when they aired “The ‘Lights” but it hasn’t aired since the Stanley Cup Finals. “The ‘Lights” did employ the unseen host which made me mourn it’s possibly temporary demise. I had some hope earlier this year when Fox Sports 1 was launched. My thought process as always “Let’s give Fox Sports Live” a chance. Unfortunately, they didn’t even give me three months of pleasure.

Hannah Storm

The EPL Review Show fills the void that is left by the sports world in the US. I don’t feel like getting into who’s the blame for this phenomenon, whether it’s the mother ship ESPN (chicken) or the people who clicked out of what I enjoy (egg). So the show doesn’t have a host and shockingly enough, shows highlights for the 46-52 minutes of programming that are left after commercials. I love it. They show highlights of every game in the league that week but they’re smart enough to air less highlights if the game was a snoozfest even if one of the teams is a marquee name like Manchester United. If two teams like Fulham and Crystal Palace, near the bottom (Fulham) or at the bottom (Palace) of the table, end up having a highlight worthy match, they get 10 minutes of match highlights like they did on last night’s show.

I know people might refer me to Red Zone for the NFL as a comparative show but I don’t like just seeing the scoring. These highlights show slick plays that may have resulted in a shanked kick that should have been a goal. Or a good move at midfield that may not have had an impact on the score line at all. I like to think of it in a similar vein as what the Tuesday Morning Quarterback Gregg Easterbrook calls “Hidden Plays” which are “Hidden plays are ones that never make highlight reels, but stop or sustain drives”. Well, some of those plays do make the highlight reels in the EPL Review Show because they dedicate the proper amount of time to the game they are covering, not the people in the game they are covering.

I can praise this show all I want, but I get an odd feeling that TV executives at NBC, ESPN or Fox aren’t going to be listening to my carping. That’s okay because I’m a glass half full guy. What I’ll do is sit down every week and enjoy highlights from the most fantastic soccer league in the world. I’ll also get to see a second highlight goal from Steve Sidwell in Fulham, not long after Kasami’s goal of the year candidate. – Kevin

Dusty’s Blog: Dusty answers five random questions

mailbag-

You know, every week we get so many cards and letters here at the Stunt Granny Headquarters, it’s just ridiculous. Normally we just completely ignore them, because we are so much better than all you readers out there. Sometimes Jeremy will take a letter into the bathroom with him if we are running low on toilet paper.

But now I have decided in the interest of creating content, to change all that. Every week I will be answering five random questions from you, our lovely loyal readers. Without any further ado, throw your mittens around your kittens and away we go:

1.) What are your thoughts on the Repo Man? – Dusty G., Fond du Lac, Wisc.

Yeah, that’s an interesting question, Dusty, I was just thinking about the Repo Man. Like, have you ever wondered who drives the Repo Man to the place where he is repoing the car? Because he always just hot wires the car and drives away with it, right? So, like, is a friend dropping him at the house so he can repo the car? Is he taking public transportation, like a bus or a taxi cab to get to the place to repo the car? Perhaps there is a never ending stream of repo’d cars that serve the purpose of leading him to the next house to repo the next car. Maybe he lives close by and just walked.

The point of the matter is that Repo was completely awesome and I always felt like if a bunch of the guys had teamed up to eliminate Yokozuna at the 1993 Royal Rumble, that match was Repo’s for the taking. See what I did there with that sentence? Why am I asking you the questions?

2.) What are your thoughts on the whole Jimmy Hart/Nasty Boys/Natural Disasters/Money Inc thing? – Dusty G., Fond du Lac, Wisc.

Yeah, that’s an excellent question. I was just thinking about this recently. See, it all goes back to Mr Fuji in 1990. In early ’90 Fuji managed the Powers of Pain. And then in like February, he debuted the Orient Express. Everyone put up a stink about what an obvious conflict of interest this was, and so Fuji ended up selling the Warlord to Slick and the Barbarian to Bobby Heenan, so he could concentrate all of his energies on managing his new, completely inferior team. It was tremendous booking.

So now Jimmy Hart in 1991. His Nasty Boys win the tag belts from the Hart Foundation at WrestleMania so that they can drop the belts to the Legion of Doom at SummerSlam and break up the Foundation so that Bret can finally get a big singles push. The problems start right before SummerSlam when Jimmy unveils his new tag team, the Natural Disasters. At SummerSlam, LOD should have beaten the Nastys, and the Disasters should have beaten the Bushwhackers. And then you *have* to turn the Nastys face. You cant really split them up since they’d be crap on their own, and you can’t keep them with Jimmy since he now has a new team. So that Survivor Series match (Rockers & Bushwhackers vs Beverly Brothers & Nastys) would have to be changed around, but I’m not trying to be a completist here. I’m talking about one specific line of booking.

So then you have LOD beat the Disasters at Royal Rumble 1992, shortly thereafter Jimmy unveils another new team, Money Inc. At this point, the Disasters have to turn face, since they would be clearly butt hurt about Jimmy favoring his new team over them. Maybe you wait until after WrestleMania 8, though, where you could have LOD over the Disasters and Money Inc over the Nasty Boys, if you so wanted.

There could be many different ways to achieve that same goal, but the point is they didn’t do any of them. They keep the Nastys with Jimmy all the way through SummerSlam 1992, which was logically ridiculous and clearly defied the hallmark they themselves had put into place a couple years prior. It just honks me off like a goose!

3.) Some idiot recently said that Ultimate Warrior was the worst main eventer in history. Your thoughts, please? – Dusty G., Fond du Lac, Wisc.

Very good question. Yes, he is an idiot, first of all. Second of all, it’s not really close to true. This subject was recently batted around on Facebook and a lot of people got lost in the tall grass, arguing that Warrior was a horrible worker. It might or might not be true, but it’s completely besides the main point.

See, Diesel was the worst drawing WWF Champion in history. So since he came *after* Warrior, that automatically makes him worse, no? He was no great shakes in the ring, either. Bret got a good match out of him, but Bret could get a good match out of the couch. Diesel was atrocious, didn’t draw a dime, and he was just really terrible.

Another matter is that Warrior was completely sabotaged by Hulk Hogan every step of the way. Follow me here on a history lesson. They debuted Earthquake by making him friends with Dino Bravo and having the two attack the Warrior. Before his Mania win over Hogan for the WWF Title, Warrior was beating Bravo at house shows. Therefore, all of that would lead perfectly, one would assume, towards Warrior feuding with Earthquake post WrestleMania. It should stand to reason that the number one face should be feuding with the number one heel in the company. (Please note that I’m not slagging Rick Rude at all by saying this. It’s just that he was a step or two below Quake on the totem pole at his point.)

Instead, Hogan got the A-match at SummerSlam and all of the hype leading up to it, with the injury angle, the get well letters campaign and the guys in the corner stuff. Warrior got the second most hyped match. And then, even more ridiculously, Warrior had no feud whatsoever going into the Survivor Series. He was pasted into a survivors match that he nothing to do with (Perfect vs. Tornado, Demolition vs. LOD). And then by Royal Rumble ’91, he was already losing the belt.  Hogan, meanwhile, carried the Earthquake feud through the end of the year, won the Rumble, and then beat Slaughter for the belt at Mania. There was never really a point during Warrior’s title reign that you couldn’t plausibly argue that Hogan was still the top star in the company.

So what I’m saying is, other than the workrate, you could conceivably blame every one of Warrior’s failings as top dog in the company on Hogan. After that he started flaking out and no showing stuff and trying to hold up Vince for more money and all of that, and I would argue that you could trace all of that back to Hogan sabotaging him in 1990.  But I mean, it’s not like Hogan has a history of doing that, or anything.

Also of note is that guys like Jack Swagger and the Miz are much worse main eventers as well. It is actually embarrassing that guys like that were allowed to hold the title. It’s a byproduct of today’s environment, where the name WWE sells the tickets and it doesn’t really matter who the champion is, and everyone gets a turn with every belt anyway, and there’s 5 million belts anyway, and nothing means anything, but man, do those guys suck. Especially Swagger.

Also of note is that workrate doesn’t mean shit in professional wrestling.

4.) Who are your top five SportsCenter anchors of all time? – Dusty G., Fond du Lac, Wisc.

Such a great question. I would have to go like this…

1 – Keith Olbermann

2 – Dan Patrick

3 – Kenny Mayne

4 – Scott Van Pelt

5 – Charley Steiner

Speaking of SportsCenter and ESPN, isn’t it weird that Chris Berman is, as Bob Ley once called Steiner, a “professional putz” when he went to Brown University and graduated with a degree in history? You would think he would be more serious, like Ley, instead of being Mr Sound Effects and guy-who-gives-everyone-a-crummy-nickname guy. Then again, him graduating college in the late 70s does explain his shitty taste in music.

5.) Who could it be now? – Dusty G., Fond du Lac, Wisc.

Not sure.

Stunt Granny Sports Show #11

Yes indeed it is yet another Stunt Granny Sports Show. Jeremy and Eric2 are back and get right in to the big stories for a change. They discuss the Aaron Hernandez problem. How stupid is this guy? Is it worse t leave a trail of bred crumbs or a trail of chewing gum? Does the color matter? Just how does technology work? Does smashing your cell phone erase history? How happy is Tim Tebow that the spotlight is not on him for a change? Why was Tim Tebow hanging at a bar anyway? Manny Ramirez, remember him? Well he is back with the Texas Rangers on a minor league contract Problem is, um, wasn’t this guy suspended for a hundred games? How did he get around that? Does MLB understand simple arithmetic? Why is it acceptable for Ramirez to return to baseball in the states while MLB is actively pursuing removing layers they have no concrete proof of using P.E.D’s?  There is also some Dwight Howard talk. How much of a surprise is it that he chose not to return to The Lakers? Eric2 has some choice words on the matters wile Jeremy wonders just what is the difference between a zebra and a giraffe. Of course this leads in to a discussion on Giraffe fighting, hence the video. So enjoy.

Stunt Granny Sports Show #11

Dusty’s Blog: Following The Dwight Howard Sweepstakes

decision-making

Eagle Eyed Dusty on the case here, doing some investigative reporting work here like you’ve never seen before.

Dwight Howard is an indecisive chap. He couldn’t even decide where he was going to make his decision. (He finally chose Podunk, Colorado, because of course he did.) What follows is an itemization of his decision making process thus far.

UPDATED! See number six.

1. The Lakers are out. ESPN.com reported last night that sources within the Lakers camp expressed concern that Howard might not be re-signing with them. I ran that sentence through the Babelfish translator and it came back: “Howard told Kobe to piss off.” So they are out.

Let me take a second here to say something about that, though. According to the articles I read, during the Lakers pitch to Howard, Kobe basically lectured Howard on how he wasn’t a winner, but Kobe is, and Kobe can teach him how to become a winner by watching him. What amount of bullshit is that? How insulting, first of all. Second of all, this “Dwight is a loser” thing is rubbish. It’s just like Lebron James. He’s a loser until he wins, then he’s a winner.

I don’t think it’s all that far of a branch to go off on to say that Dwight already has to what it takes to carry a team to a championship. He almost did it with the Magic when their next best player was Hedo Turkoglu. If the luxury tax ever breaks up the Heat, Dwight is going to win multiple championships wherever he decides to go. Consider him the modern day Hakeem Olajuwon.

2. The Warriors are out. They managed to get the Jazz to take on the asinine nonsense contracts of Brandon Rush, Andris Biedrins and Richard Jefferson, thus effectively clearing enough cap room for Howard. So, of course, they immediately turn around and sign Andre Iguodola with that money.

I suppose they could still do a sign-and-trade with the Lakers for Andrew Bogut’s contract and Klay Thompson and Harrison Barnes. Only two problems there. One is that the Lakers are not at all interested in doing business with the Warriors, from everything they’ve said or kinda said or not really said but really said. For another, the numbers still don’t work and the Warriors don’t have a fourth guy to throw in, and so logistically I’m not sure it really works at all.

And for a third thing, if that deal does go through, ho man is that a thin team after Howard, Iggy and Stephen Curry. Sheesh.  So they’re out.

3. The Mavericks are out. This headline just went up on ESPN.com. This marks the first time I’ve been wrong since ’82, because I totally thought he would go to Dallas to play alongside Dirk Nowitzki. Oh well.

Apparently Dwight’s people informed Mark Cuban that they are out of the running, and Cuban immediately notified the media via email. Howard did not give any inclination as to what team he did decide to go to.

4. So that leaves the Hawks and Rockets. I have been adamant during this whole thing that Howard is not going to the rockets. For one thing, I hate them. For another thing, it’s not really an ideal situation. They already blew their wad on Omer Asik to play center when they failed to get Pau Gasol last offseason. Unless they want to play two centers, they would have to unload Asik and his dumb contract somewhere else, and then all you have is Howard and James Harden and another paper thin team. So that leaves…

5. He’s going to the Hawks. I am going out on a limb and reporting this as fact. You can thank me after the fact. I was wrong, as I initially believed no sane person would ever want to play in Atlanta, but there you go. They are well under the salary cap, so they can basically mold the team around Howard however they see fit, with multiple other free agents coming in. They already have Al Horford and Kyle Korver as well, and Jeff Teague could be coming back. It’s really not a bad situation to fall into.

And it’s the one he’s going to fall into! You can take it to the bank.

(Dusty’s note: In this life, I play two games, and two games only. One is backgammon. The other is the lesser known, just as good, If I’m Wrong I’m Supposed To Be Wrong But If I’m Right I’m A Genius game. I’m not saying,  I’m just saying.)

6. He has informed everyone but the Rockets that he will not be going there. So I was wrong about the Hawks. That’s the first time I’ve been wrong since ’82. Interesting to see how this shakes out now, because you gotta believe Asik is going to be all “Uh uh, I ain’t having this.” The Rockets could prove to be a legit championship contender next season if they can get the right package in return for Asik and his Adam’s apple.

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