Stunt Granny Audio: OHPA 10

Ken and Kevin have made it to double digits for OHPA. They start off by talking one of their favorite movies that is celebrating it’s 28th Anniversary of being released, Big Trouble in Little China. Why did they not do this movie for the Retro Movie Review? Does it still hold up to what they thought it was when they saw it as children? Which movie were they trying to beat out that also has an Asian theme to it? Has Hollywood changed at all since the Eighties? Which movie was banded in the Phillips household but was allowed in the DiFrango household? How did Bugs Bunny come up in this conversation? Is this Kevin’s favorite Kurt Russell movie? Which Sci Fi standard did Ken bring up as a Kurt Russell classic? Did this movie influence Mortal Kombat? Ken & Kevin finally move on to a planned subject, the United States soccer team’s loss to Belgium. What went wrong? What went right? How big was the miss by Chris Wondolowski? What can’t Tim Howard save? How much progress is the US Squad making under Juergen Klinsmann? What are with his tactics of burying his team prior to the World Cup? Would either of the hosts be motivated by the negative thinking? They continue in the soccer vein by talking about Lionel Messi of Argentina. How many ways did FiveThirtyEight prove that he is great? How much soccer does Kevin watch? Is Cristiano Ronaldo even close to competing with him? Would the US Squad been able to solve Messi? Is it just his shooting that is great or is his passing superior too? How many statistics can you track in soccer? Can they extricate his data from that of the teams he plays on? Is it a good idea to break up reading this article? It’s never good to break up the drinking of the weekly #SippyTimeBeer. What is it this week and where is it from? Find out when you click on the link below.

#SippyTimeBeer Review

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Birra MorettiPremium Lager – The first time I had this beer, I was just starting my studies in Florence, Italy. One of my goals when I went there was to try over one hundred beers. I surpassed my goal but no thanks to the efforts of some of my kin. Moretti is the Budweiser (not the Czech kind) of Italy. It goes down and comes out with no special flavor. I wasn’t paying for this because it was at my office Christmas party. I wouldn’t go out of my way to order this beer, no matter what Italian restuarant you frequent. Order Chianti. You’re welcome.

Bell’s BreweryWinter White Ale – I went to see my friends’ band Australosurfecus on Thursday night at Byrne’s Pub. My window for tasting winter beers is closing with the New Year around the bend. This beer was a mix of the expected from a winter beer (clove) with a twist (the white ale). I really like the crispness that comes from white ales. Bell’s also drops hints of fruits (I think orange and lemon) to help freshen up the beer. It makes it taste more like a refreshing summer beer. If you live in these areas, you can taste this tasty beverage from Kalamazoo, Michigan.

Never forget to check out TheFullPint to see if they agree with my palate about Moretti or Winter White Ale. -Kevin

Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of @WWE #Raw

I had to lead off with one of the more ridiculous things my room mate has ever said to my girlfriend. Really, he has a whole lot of those but this one happened on Saturday. We were getting ready to go see Jim Norton over at the Funny Bone so I was making some pasta and tomato sauce. If anyone has read this column before, you know it’s a regular practice. As the sauce was cooking, I went up to take a shower leaving her down here to keep things in order. Roomie shows up plowed out of his mind (thanks to his brother in law. The one attached to the baby momma and the only reason he’s living in my basement. We’ll get to that insanity some other time.) and tells my girl that he taught me everything I knew about wine. Evidently he invited me over to his place to take informal classes and was taught how to pick my wines. He then decided to give the tomato sauce a little stir and told her “It wasn’t thick enough.” I was told this while we drove to the Funny Bone and I had quite a hearty laugh. I didn’t ever go over to his place for wine classes. I got most of my wine knowledge when I lived near Tuscan vineyards. We actually had a class on it while I was studying in Florence. As for his critique of my tomato sauce, he was correct but that’s only because it hadn’t cooked the proper length of time yet. What a dolt. Let’s roll.

Two referees in two weeks. What the hell is going on in Vince’s world? Is he that stuck on the NFL’s terrible referees? After a brow beating by CM Punk, Paul Heyman does it too. Vince is stuck on the NFL. Their ratings aren’t in the toilet. My girl doesn’t think the short shorts are GM leg wear. I beg to differ. AJ Lee sends him the ref to the back. I am pretty tired of the employees running things in wrestling. Punk re-shows the video of AJ proposing to him. Punk is being a real creep. That’s a good thing. Paul, you’re not going to trump any of those power couples. Just knock it off. Does the board not watch when sexual harassment is going on?

We get more referee TV time. The WWE keeps forgetting how many wrestlers they have on the roster. AJ promises to fire him while looking out into space. I like her acting but still don’t care for the story line of “Let’s fire every GM every show.” We have a Twitter fight turned into a wrestling match. Dolph Ziggler is taking on Kofi Kingston who is apparently still in a tag team since R Truth comes to the ring with him. Can’t someone take this loss to Ziggler that isn’t in a big tag team? From the tweets, it looks as made up as any bad WWE story. All story, little match before the break.

I want to break my lap top when Criss Angel weighs in on Lil’ Jimmy. Kofi is not helping out the quality of the match. Ziggler seems to be a little out of place on some of these moves too. Kofi is one of the few guys who could get the rise out of the crowd that he did since it’s believable he could win. Zig Zag for the win after a couple of near falls. Jim Ross & Mitchell Cool tell us about John Cena‘s injury. He’s going to give us a live update.

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Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of Raw

Florence is where I learned to love wine.

Tonight is not a night for a #SippyTimeBeer because I’m making tomato sauce. Any time I cook a sauce or usually when I make any Italian dish, I bust out the wine for the night. Every now and again, event the fellows at Stunt Granny have some level of sophistication. They make a killer wine in Tuscany (Florence’s state) that is called Chianti that is a mix of grapes and is my favorite. I used a California wine called Menage a Trois which is pretty much the same thing since it’s a mix of Zinfandel, Merlot & Cabernet Sauvignon. Good stuff. And remember tomato sauces = red wine and cream sauces = wine white. Time for wrestling. Let’s roll.

Evidently the Rock can only film from the same mountain top. Rock turns down Cena’s offer. Rock is looking really ripped. Glad the WWE finally put up an “Earlier Today” sign. The Rock is teaming with him for the people. The crowd even realizes how anti-climatic this announcement is. What the hell is the director doing with the long shot that doesn’t even show the video? It doesn’t make fun of children who root for Cena. Naturally it’s a threat to Cena too.

CM Punk takes on Mark Henry. Glad they waited a whole week to show the ring being broken. I’m so glad I didn’t order that PPV. I like the look of concern on Punk’s face. Even as much as I love Punk, he better get the “I can see it miles away” interference from Big Show to win. Ricardo assaults Henry to try and get him the DQ. The director fucks up again by not showing Ricardo getting the World’s Strongest Slam. Nice way to stretch out an eventual match.

We are privileged to have the Rock on actual program in two weeks. The Muppets get interrupted by “Excuse Me”. Jack Swagger gets to suck. Kermit & Piggy might pull him out of this. Santino gets in on the act. It’s a train wreck. The guy working the Muppets show more emotion than Swagger. Kelly gets to flirt with Kermit.

During the commercials, Emmitt Smith was hocking some foot insert then I got a Don King commercial. Continue the ridiculousness. The Divas Battle Royal was “hilarious” with the costume run down before the match starts. Alicia Fox wins this thing since she won last week? Nope. Eve wins again. They threw that match together so I can see stretching this thing out. I like the idea of a threesome taking on Beth & Natalya. Christian picks on poor Beaker. Sheamus acts like they’re in the same family.

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Kevin’s Blog: Definitely Live & Half Assed Review of Raw

Which level of hell did the wrestlers get to last night?

You wouldn’t believe the pathetic pictures for “Fallout” (they’re all for Fall Out Boy), “Aftermath” (Bomb photos which I wasn’t quite looking for) and “Hell” (Nothing good). So I went “Dante’s Inferno” and that’s what you get. I visited his house when I was in Florence since that is where he grew up (I’ll check on that). He did invent modern Italian with that book since it was still a collection of local dialects. Welcome to factoid day here. Time for wrestling. Let’s roll.

We get started with Randy Orton taking on “What ever happened to?” to Drew McIntyre. Orton whoops on him for a bit then starts to sell. In the mean time, Eric sends me this gem in a text “He’s now being announced as the Apex Predator? No more Viper? At least that nickname didn’t sound like a smooth pervert on Dateline NBC.” I never thought of that name that way but I could see that used for a serial rapist. Orton hits a second RKO on Drew just for shits and giggles. I love a squash match to start Raw. It just dawned on me that they started with a match. Henry shows up afterwards. A brawl ensues so that someone can prove HHH is losing control even though this type of event is a staple in wrestling.

Good on WWE to hype Smackdown and more importantly Big Show. It’d be nice if Orton didn’t spend the year just feuding with Christian and Henry. I told the WWE to shit or get off the pot with Jack Swagger, Dolph Ziggler and John Morrison. I’m going to say they’re shitting on Morrison. Cole making the argument I just predicted. JR disagreeing with Cole now that King isn’t there. Henry wins in our second consecutive squash match. Oh no, as scary as Henry just was I’m thinking if he starts over using “Hall of Pain” may make him popular. The WWE lulls me to sleep talking about lawsuits brought to you by bores Johnny Wooden Gobbler and Jennifer Hudson’s husband.

Del Rio is still being shoved down our throats as Dolph Ziggler, Jack Swagger, Vickie Guerrero, Christian and some Harvard grad.  Alberto is not doing well. Christian does better in 10 seconds of mic time. Cody shows off how to deliver a good promo in a weird cadence. Take note Del Rio. Dolph acquits himself well. Swagger shows why he isn’t going anywhere. The crowd boos Vickie more than anyone else. Otunga trips over his tongue 3 words into his promo. HHH shows up to save us from the terrible TV him and his wife subjected us to. Trips gives us a “Being men” speech. Easy fodder.

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