Stunt Granny Audio Show #231

The Guardian Did Age Progression on Dixie Carter

The Guardian Did Age Progression on Dixie Carter

Jeremy & Kevin are back in your ear holes. They start off by talking about Kevin’s awful trip into Pennsylvania this past weekend. If watching your team lose is bad, what makes it even worse? Kevin got two experience two different types of insult to injury during the Kent State and Pittsburgh Pirates game. They move on to talk about wrestling, specifically Raw. Did any of the story lines move along? Did that make the show bad? How bitter is Jeremy about the Chicago Blackhawks beating the Detroit Red Wings? Did this taint his evaluation of CM Punk’s promo? They weren’t surprised by the eliminations on during the 11 on 3 for the baby faces but they did break down the eliminations of the Shield members. Should the announcers had made a bigger deal out of Roman Reigns being pinned? Why was Seth Rollins the last one in the ring? Jeremy & Kevin move along to Jerry Jarrett’s take on Dixie Carter. Was he correct in his criticisms? Do you need to eat, sleep and breath wrestling to be successful? Did it help Jarrett succeed? Does he have anything in common with Carter? They segue into Dixie and her stellar acting going against AJ Styles. What built in storyline did TNA skip over to produce another heel authority figure? Should they have put over Magnus instead of Styles to avoid this angle? Is the Bound For Glory Series where TNA home grown stars go to die? Does it help Bobby Roode to be back in a team? Does anyone remember James Storm? Is TNA even wasting WWE talents like Jeff Hardy? We know some of these questions are easy to answer but we give them the analysis that you crave. Grab a #SippyTimeBeer, slap on the head phones and enjoy this romp through sports and wrestling.

Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of #ImpactWrestling

hello-from-on-stinker-to-another-700x449Boy, it has been a slow news week. I haven’t been able to dream up too much either. It’s been a bit of a stinker on the site. So why not continue to stink up the joint with a review of Impact Wrestling? Sounds like a plan to me. Let’s roll.

Okay, I know baby faces are supposed to be dumb. But they were dumb enough for the Tito Ortiz trap? Incredibly dumb. Tito Ortiz is with Bully Ray. Ken Anderson, just voted VP, is now in charge of himself. This Aces & Eights group has taken a serious hit recently. In name they’re a faction but in practice, they aren’t. Bobby Roode comes out with Christopher Daniels & Frankie Kazarian. Roode is the mouth piece. They’re going to do anything to win the BFG Series. They take their turns bragging. Roode asks Austin Aries to join them. James Storm shows up because enough people haven’t been in this opening segment yet. Gunner is in tow. Storm looks really good. Seems to have lost some weight. We get a tag match with Kazarian & Roode against the baby faces. What a cluster fuck of a segment.

I know it’s supposed to evoke a tough guy image to be fighting in jeans but it looks like a gay cowboy video.

swayze-roadhouse-fuck-guys-like-you-in-prisonI love Roadhouse but this segment looks gay. I mean, if you enjoy it, have at it. I don’t want to see it in my wrestling program. Roode cheats to win with a low blow. I don’t think that match got enough time after the break. Austin Aries cuts another good promo. He covers his bases to keep you guessing as to his decision. I pick he stays a loner.

Manik is taking on Sonjay Dutt. They show Hulk Hogan’s tweet about the X Division going to one on one action. Can I laugh when they inevitably have a three man match in the near future? Taz had someone in his past wear a mask all the time. You almost had me convinced, Taz. I was this close to buying it. Manik wins. Big surprise. Ken Anderson talks to a leaderless club house. Devon’s going to Testify. Having one less person in the group isn’t a bad thing. Even if it was one of the better members.

Joseph Park, Jay Bradley, Hernandez and Christopher Daniels fought over the last 20 point match. I have to give them credit. They’ve done a much better job of point attempts for each competitor. Nothing major happens before the break. Kazarian distracts Park. Dumb bell. Keep the Boston Crab locked. I do agree with Mike Tenay about the intent of the street fight rules, which is not having outside forces interfere. It’s still a man on man. Austin Aries brainbusters Daniels. Kaz & Roode chase him to the back. Bradley and Park are in the ring. Park sees blood, me go angry. Black Hole Slam. 20 points to Park. He’s out of the negatives. Eric Young is working with Park still.

Samoa Joe & Brutus pump up Rampage Jackson & Sting. Bull Ray comes out after a video package. Dear lord, he’s trying to claim we were suckered. No one believed it for a second. Tito Ortiz calls Rampage a dummy. Why has he been sapped of charisma like Rampage? Brooke Tessmacher, right? Yep. Brooke takes off his ring and spits it out. They both have the same chin.

Gail Kim is taking on ODB. I’m not excited. I’m glad they’ve gone back to normal refs in a woman’s match. Gail Kim is sneaky to get her turn at offense. Kim even botched a move, a shoulder breaker. ODB is bigger than she thought. The crowd is not getting into the crotch turn buckle smash. ODB needs to tweak the gimmick. Gail Kim takes advantage of early shoulder damage for the roll up pin. I like the result. Main event coming up next.

I buzzed thru the entrances but still listened to Ken Anderson babble. He gets to introduce Bully Ray & the posse. Sting gets to pump up the crowd. I guess that’s why he was silent earlier. AJ Styles saunters down to the ring. He’s so dreamy and mysterious. Oh my goodness, they’re even calling him the “Old” AJ Styles. Ha. At least they acknowledged their mistake. Not that this version is some master piece but it’s better than brooding bad boy. The crowd is eating it up so far. I still think Rampage is taking the pin fall. Brisco & Bischoff get to be the bitches for Aces & Eights.

This match does look better with only one team wearing jeans and most of their shirts being on. Wes Brisco still looks light in the loafers for going with the vest only look. I did see the news that AJ’s contract is up soon. I don’t see him being WWE material unless he discovers a better character. Rampage is in the middle of the ring. He barely executes some moves. Knux gets put in the Scorpion. Devon saves him. Sting with the lamest kick out ever. AJ gets to clean house. AJ pins Devon with the Styles Clash. Wow. I didn’t see that one coming. -Kevin

Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of #TNA #ImpactWrestling

repeater_300dpiI’m repeating my weekend travel plans from last week except I’m going for my girl’s grandmother’s 92nd birthday. So in order to clean off the DVR, let’s roll.

I forgot that they were going to be at IUP. James Storm is in the ring. AJ Styles is in the stands. Bad Influence joins them. I do like their sales pitch. Aces & Eights are beating up Storm again. The rest of the people who have been beat up suck. Joseph Park sucks the least. 3D thru the table so he can feel his Abyss roots.

Aces & Eights are still in the ring so that they can suck the energy out of the room. They beat up all of our heroes. Why didn’t they deliver that promo before the break? It was a short promo then you reset after the commercial break. Tazz tried to sound tough before another commercial break. Yep, thanks for making two segments suck instead of one.

Taryn Terrell is fighting Tara. The only thing catching my attention are Tazz & Tenay fighting like sixth graders. Then Tazz notes that ODB is sober. Yep, they let Taryn hang around to get the cheap pin when Tara got cocky. Always a decent way to build up a babyface without hurting the heel. People don’t care.

Rob Terry is taking on Jesse. I feel bad for this crowd. What did they do to deserve this? Robbie E saves Jesse from a pin. Weird spine buster type move for the win by Terry. Woof.

Bad Influence tries to recruit Bobby Roode. We get reruns of Jeff Hardy losing. Good for Chris Sabin coming back. He’s a tough cookie.

Austin Aries confronts Bobby Roode about getting Fortune back together. He makes several good points himself. I guess they’re gunning for the World Tag Team Titles. Chavo & Hernandez have the belts but seem like after thoughts in this match. The baby faces get to take advantage of an arguing team. Wow, Hernandez looked like he may have hurt himself. I’m not surprised. The match has been pretty good as a over all though. Kaz runs interference. Daniels interference back fires. Frog Splash win.

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WWE’s Triple H gets a haircut, donates grease to KFC

Bow down to the… bow down to the geek. FLAVIN!

Here’s proof that we eat up any little bit of news like Funyuns at Matt Hardy’s house or Twizzlers on a road trip from Michigan to Florida: According to TMZ.com (by way of Prowrestling.net), to quote Christian, “Someone got a haaair-cuuut!” In this case, that someone was Triple H, who has sported long hair in various layers, lengths and forms since pretty much the beginning of his career. If you think it’s strange that I’m critiquing and analyzing his hair, consider the old (and supposedly refuted) rumor that Kazarian left WWE’s developmental system because they wanted him to get a haircut since, well, there’s only room for one douche with a ponytail around these parts. (There was the other rumor that Triple H freaked out on Umaga for wearing green and black, since those are DX colors. Man, this guy is a diva.)

WWE is spinning this non-story as another example of Triple H’s likely retirement. I’m spinning it someone buying this greaseball a mirror as an anniversary gift of something. I truly feel like we should make this haircut even more viral and recommend Hunter donate his rat’s nest to Locks of Love. Then again, he’d probably confuse that for Headlock on Hunger, and then no one wins. Except Triple H, he always wins. -Eric

TNA Audio #6 – The Ghost Of Big Dick Dudley

Silly babyface, champagne is for heels.

This week, Dusty and Matt focus on the February 16 edition of TNA Impact Wrestling. This is a very special Impact, because it just so happened to fall on Dusty’s birthday. Did TNA celebrate Dusty’s birthday properly? Well, you can find out by listening to this audio as our intrepid heroes delve into such topics as:

-Why do fat ECW alums have such great calves?

-So Cal Val must have used her stroke backstage with the powers to be because she appeared on this episode no fewer than two times!

-Who exactly was that MMA announcer jabroni and why was he being interviewed by Christy Hemme?

-Why is it that Brandon Jacobs is tougher than any wrestler in the locker room?

And a whole lot more stuff about a show that they both enjoyed, in an audio replete with Under Siege and Daria references for your entertainment, and it’s only going to cost you about an hour of your time, so if you have a heart at all, you’ll wish Dusty a happy happy birthday by downloading this bad boy immediately.

Stunt Granny TNA Audio Show #6

TNA Audio #3 – Bleep you Michigan, Wisconsin is the mitten

Ref Hardy will make a disturbing face at you if you do not listen.

Our intrepid heroes Dusty and Matt continue their slog through everything TNA, this week focusing on the January 26 edition of Impact. Included herein:

-Dusty imagines a Mike Tenay-free universe

-Someone in TNA either thinks that Eric Young is actually funny, or knows that Dusty and Matt hate him and like torturing them with him

-Why TNA needs to either shit or get off the pot when it comes to being a taped show

-Why Sting is an ineffectual authority figure

-An examination of whether even TNA knows what they’re doing with their main event scene right now

And a whole lot more nonsense, and it’s only worth an hour of your time, so you need to download this immediately, or else!

 

Stunt Granny TNA Audio Show #3

Stunt Granny Audio #67

duver

There is so much to be said about building trust.

Dusty and Kevin, the resident workhorses of Stunt Granny Enterprises, are back once again to talk about a veritable plethora of wrestling related items. Dusty is mad as hell and he ain’t going to take it anymore when it comes to TNA’s nonsense. Kevin is hard pressed to disagree with any of it. They talk about why Dixie Carter’s love it or leave it speech was the absolute worst thing that could have happened for TNA right now. They also talk about Jamie Noble’s retirement from wrestling, and how it ended not with a bang, but a whimper. They also talk about a whole bunch of other stuff, and it’s in your best interests to listen to the audio to find out what those things are, because all the cool kids are doing just that.

Stunt Granny Audio #67

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