The 12 Days of Jesus H. Christmas: Day 7 – IWA-MS is bakk, Ric Flair is in debt, Sin Cara is suspended

(Let’s just cut to the chase today: When looking for only 12 stories to summarize the stupidity of an entire calendar year in pro wrestling, a) it simply becomes damn near impossible to do, and b) you start to see trends in the idiocy. So, I’m sorry, but Day 7 of the 12 Days of Jesus H. Christmas brings you three tales of retardation, each involving someone we’ve already doted upon during this series: IWA-Mid South, the little engine that shouldn’t; Ric Flair, the million-time world champion without two dimes to hold between his often-naked ass cheeks; and Sin Cara, brought in by new talent developer Triple H and then suspended faster than a botched huracanrana.)

(IWA Mid-South is Bakk: Originally posted July 22, 2011) Extry extry, read all about it: http://iwamidsouth.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=iwamsonlytopics&action=display&thread=6225&page=1

Hilariously, they’ve ethered all of the old board, apparently looking for a “fresh start.” Even more hilariously, the new ownership team is not revealing themselves. I’m placing my money on Ian Grotten and Fim Jannin, personally. – Dusty

(Hey everyone! Let’s help Ric Flair pay off his debt: Originally posted July 21, 2011) Check it out: http://ricflair.com/shop/catalog/

Most notable to you might be that the Big Gold Belt is on sale for $4,550. Most notable to me is that for $750 you can have a live video chat with the man. The Man. I would be willing to put in upwards of five dollars, if someone else wanted to pitch in as well. We could have him talk about how great Stunt Granny is for five minutes. – Dusty

(Sin Cara Suspended: Originally posted July 18, 2011) Well this explains the loss on Smackdown, then the twitching awkward exit during the Money in The Bank match. See, Sin Cara has been suspended for his first WWE Wellness Policy violation.  They don’t release what exactly he failed but the fact he failed the policy is embarrassing. Maybe this turns out to be a Rey Mysterio type of deflection and he’ll produce a prescription but it still tarnishes Sin Cara and he doesn’t have enough polish right now to recover. All the hype, mood lighting and push he has gotten haven’t amounted to anything substantial. Smackdown ratings are in the grave and is soundly panned for being boring. Hopefully this will allow Sin Cara the time to get used to WWE’s rings and a few lessons in handling pressure. -Jeremy

Day 1: Ric Flair still can’t keep his finances straight
Day 2: Bret Hart on Twitter, put the letter “S” in front of the wrong word 
Day 3: IWA-Mid South: Going Out Of Business Since 2002
Day 4: Triple H leading WWE new talent development
Day 5: Chyna to make more porn, eidvo43we.. oops, can’t see, gouged my eyes out
Day 6: Jeff Hardy tases a woman

The 12 Days of Jesus H. Christmas: Day 3 – IWA-Mid South: Going Out Of Business Since 2002

(For the 12 days leading up to Christmas, Stunt Granny will relive with you the 12 most head-slapping, dipshitty stories of 2011, the things that made us wonder why we still watch professional wrestling and support some of these dingbats. And the king of these dingbats may also be the “king of the death match;” that is to say, the guy most willing to bash his own skull in with a fluorescent light tube in the parking lot of the Taco Bell where he works, Ian Rotten. Follow the tragic story of Rotten attempting to keep IWA-Mid South afloat. And don’t be ashamed to laugh.)

(Originally posted March 29, 2011) Posted yesterday on the IWA Mid South message board (here’s the whole thread: http://iwamidsouth.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=IWA&action=display&thread=6207&page=1):

Effective immediately, IWA-MS is closing its doors.

Anyone interested in purchasing our ring, sound system, concession items (pizza oven, popcorn maker ect.) or the IWA-MS video library, should call 815-528-0792 for more information.

Thank you all for your years of patronage and support.

So seriously how much does Ian expect to get for what has to be an ancient pizza oven? That thread is something else, by the way. Who the bleep is Billy Gram? Why is he stirring shit on a message board? More importantly, how long until IWA-MS has their big comeback show? My guess is a month. – Dusty

Day 1: Ric Flair still can’t keep his finances straight
Day 2: Bret Hart on Twitter, put the letter “S” in front of the wrong word 

IWA-Mid South Is Bakk!

Extry extry, read all about it: http://iwamidsouth.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=iwamsonlytopics&action=display&thread=6225&page=1

Hilariously, they’ve ethered all of the old board, apparently looking for a “fresh start.” Even more hilariously, the new ownership team is not revealing themselves. I’m placing my money on Ian Grotten and Fim Jannin, personally. – Dusty

Stunt Granny Audio #135

Oh my god it’s another edition of Stunt Granny Audio. Dusty and Eric come at ya this week dropping knowledge and kickin puppies for good, yeah good, behavior.  This time around they talk about the demise of IWA-Midsouth Wrestling. Is it uncouth to dance on the grave already? They also talk about Michaels Cole’s homoslur on Twitter. Why is this a big deal and is there an actual anti-Michael Cole agenda out there in cyber land. Keeping it current, Fit Finlay was fired and the boys have things to say about that. They also manage some John Cena knowledge as well. It is brisk thirty minutes so give it a listen.

Oh and don’t forget tomorrow starts the annual WrestleMania preview shows with Jeremy & Kevin. So come on back and check them out.

Stunt Granny Audio #135

IWA-Mid South: Going Out Of Business Since 2002

Posted yesterday on the IWA Mid South message board (here’s the whole thread: http://iwamidsouth.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=IWA&action=display&thread=6207&page=1):

Effective immediately, IWA-MS is closing its doors.

Anyone interested in purchasing our ring, sound system, concession items (pizza oven, popcorn maker ect.) or the IWA-MS video library, should call 815-528-0792 for more information.

Thank you all for your years of patronage and support.

So seriously how much does Ian expect to get for what has to be an ancient pizza oven? That thread is something else, by the way. Who the bleep is Billy Gram? Why is he stirring shit on a message board? More importantly, how long until IWA-MS has their big comeback show? My guess is a month. – Dusty

IWA-MS tryout announced, hardware stores spring up nearby

The top babyface stable in the company.

The top babyface stable in the company.

Dusty “Babyshoes Terwiliger” Giebink passed along the following information from a mysterious message board, about IWA Mid-South holding tryouts and the glory that’s sure to follow:

So You Think You Can Wrestle
Friday July 24, 2009
The Bellevue Plaza
325 Bellevue Avenue
Bellevue, IL
8 pm Belltime
All tickets: $5

We will be running the tryout show just a little bit different. To start with, every match will be given 5 min. to prove their talents in the ring. If the match does well, then they will make it to the 5 min. mark. If the fans decide that the match needs to end before it’s 5 min. are up, the bell will ring and the match will end immediately. To makes this a little bit more interesting, after the 5 min. are up, there will be three judges from the IWA Mid South locker room to give their thoughts on the match. A fourth judge will also be asked their opinion, but the fourth judge will be a member of our audience. They will get the chance to be heard on what they liked or disliked and if they thought the fans enjoyed the match.

The last tryout show saw the biggest opportunity earned…”Tokyo Monster” Kahagas was so impressive in his tryout match that he earned an birth into the 2009 Ted Petty Invitational to square off against Roderick Strong. Anyone that was at the tryout show is already anxious to see that hard hitting battle just waiting to happen!

The tryouts are rumored to be BYOLT (Bring Your Own Light Tubes), so come prepared! -Eric

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