Lauren Mayhew is Gone. Who?

Yeah so I am stuck at work for another forty-five minutes or so I can’t watch my usual gangbang porn. Plus, I have read all my comics for the week. So,  I browsed the net and  came across this useless bit of knowledge. According to various sources but using as a link, Lauren Mayhew has been released from WWE. She says she left but we all know that no one leaves WWE. They fire your ass for sucking. Well, I guess not always I suppose. After all, Chavo Guerrero and Hornswaggle still have jobs.

Anyway, Lauren was supposed to replace Lillian Garcia once she departed but the girl never worked. She was stale on the mic and when that is your only job its never good. This makes her supposed reason for leaving funny. See, she says she is leaving to pursue acting and music. Whatever toots, if the brief glimpse we got of you over the past few months is any indication we’ll be seeing you sing while grinding your finely trimmed poon on Cinemax.

Ok, maybe that’s not so bad. -Jeremy

Meet Lilian’s Replacement

She's a real pretty lady, Richard...

She's a real pretty lady, Richard...

So, I’d like to introduce you to Lilian Garcia’s replacement, Lauren Mayhew. She won’t technically be replacing Lilian, I should point out, since she will be acting as the Smackdown ring announcer while Justin Roberts slides over to take over the duties on Raw. I’d like to congratulate Justin on the promotion, since I feel like he is great at what he does and definitely deserves it.

As for Lauren, obviously I don’t know much about her, but I do know she has a YouTube page (which can be found here and a website (which can be found here (, so everyone should just go to those sites if they are desperate for more information about her. Here is a video of her doing the National Anthem, and I can tell she’s already worlds better than the ol’ Perpetual Failure she’s replacing. – Dusty

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