Happy 59th birthday, Hulk Hogan!

(Those were happier days, dude; look below for some hatred, brother!)

Hulk Hogan turned 59 today, and some of his friends have wonderful birthday wishes for the No. 1 Hulkamaniac. Here’s “Dr. D” David Schultz, the man who claims to have stuck Hogan in the buttock with injectable steroids so often it made his ass harder than a prison lifer:

Booker T would normally leave a present for the Hulkster, but in this case, he wants to take something:

Shawn Michaels offers up his own interpretive dance:

And Hulk’s old nemesis Ultimate Warrior conjures up some fun memories:

Hulkster, allow your fans at Stunt Granny to pile on… er, continue the birthday wishes, and here’s to hoping you can keep Tweeting about what a great day it is to be alive, while Linda sells, like, 14 copies of her shitty tell-all autobiography. -Eric

North Carolina Indy Wrestler Writes Open Letter To Matt Hardy

Hey, why don't you have a few drinks and then go drive home.

Speaks for itself:

After reading about what happened with Matt Hardy yesterday, I surfed the internet and saw what many fans were saying.

Matt Hardy is a drug addict. Matt Hardy is a loser. Matt Hardy is a liar. I have been to Matt Hardy’s home several times and have seen the real Matt Hardy. Matt Hardy is loved. Matt Hardy is genuine. Matt Hardy is generous.

I am writing this because I fear for the man’s life. It is no secret that the Hardy Boyz are going down a dangerous path full of prescription pills, illegal drugs and copious amounts of alcohol consumption.

The North Carolina wrestling scene is centered around the Hardy Boyz. These guys look out for the guys coming up. Every year, they have a Christmas party where they invite everyone in the business, whether you have 1 year or 20 years in, to come celebrate. The parties are wild, but the Hardyz go out of their way to say hi to everyone. No one is excluded, an indy wrestler is welcomed and greeted as if they were a TV name.

Last year’s Christmas party was when I seriously wanted to say something, but the man has treated me well so I bit my lip. After reading his most recent news, I wanted to get this out there for his real friends to process.

At last year’s Christmas party, Matt Hardy was openly taking drugs and getting hammered on booze. A bunch of us were downstairs shooting the shit then all of a sudden we heard this huge CRASH. We all ran to the sound of the noise, and what we saw was Matt Hardy laying in a pile of glass like he was one of those untrained death match guys. Matt Hardy was so fucked up on drugs and booze that he fell through a glass coffee table. While cut up and bloody, he was ok. Fortunately he suffered no serious damage.

After nearly killing himself and becoming a news story for wrestling sites, the party resumed like nothing happened. That is when I realized Matt’s closest friends are his biggest enablers. Instead of taking a step back and saying “Wow, you almost killed yourself, we may have a problem here”, I saw Matt’s friends giving him more shots and more pills.
My point is that Matt is a great guy but will get no help from his friends. Some of his friends are stooges that don’t dare talk back or question Matt. Matt takes care of people and in return expects not to be questioned.

Matt needs tough love. He has a ring rat girlfriend who has told people she is with him for her career. No sane woman would allow themselves to get tazed and beat up by drug addicted men 15 years her senior. She said her name is always mentioned with his and it’s a form of advertising. Matt needs to stop tasering women, re-evaluate his life and stop giving us Jeff Hardy updates. The only difference for a long period of time between Jeff & Matt was that Jeff’s problems became public. Brother Jeff is just as open and cool as Matt, but together, they are destructive together.

I am writing this in the hopes that if people really consider themselves a friend of Hardy, and many will tell you they are here, then please talk to Matt and get him help. We don’t need another obituary. IT WILL BE THE SAME PEOPLE WHO CAN HELP HIM NOW THAT WILL BE WRITING TEAR JERKING CONDOLENCES AND POSTING THEIR CROCODILE TEARS USING MATT HARDY’S DEATH AS A WAY OF ADVANCING THEIR OWN CAREERS.

Matt Hardy needs to put the twitter down, the youtube down and really needs his friends to stand up for him. All this enabling will lead Matt to an early grave but tough love could be the turning point for this well-hearted person.

Get well Matt, I pray for you.
-Just a no name indy wrestler.

 
Matt Hardy is going to die. – Dusty

In the case of Terri Runnels v. New Jack

Unrelated to the below story, here's a picture of an Austrian dude with a spaghetti strainer on his head.

Some new evidence has come to light, courtesy of this http://www.facebook.com/notes/new-jack/she-drew-first-blood-now-terri-runnels-is-toast/179764132087945:

In response to Terri Runnels and the garbage she is saying
1. I left Terri because she is an bi-polar alcoholic who gets every morning at 5:30 to make a very stiff vodka and cranberry….. EVERY MORNING!!
 
2. She’s hooked on percs,,,, BAD!!

3. She is very big liar and the Terri Runnels that you(the world) know is totally different from who I had to deal with. She not that little sweet innocent girl she pretends to be.

4. Her house is in foreclosure (public record) and been there for 2 years and she thought I was gonna be her savior.

5. She doesn’t want a man. She wants a butler and or driver.

6. She let her daughter bring a online stranger over for Christmas without checking him out. (WHAT KIND OF PARENT IS THAT)

.. BUT ONE THE MAIN REASONS IS THAT I FOUND OUT (the hard way) THAT SHE HAD HERPES SINCE SHE WAS 18 AND HAD NO PROBLEMS HIDING FROM PEOPLE WHILE HAVING UNPROTECTED SEX. I’M WAITING FOR MY TEST RESULTS …UPDATES COMING)

TRUST ME THIS IS GOING MUCH BIGGER THAN THE INTERNET!!

Just, several things come to mind here. One is, I would still crawl through a desert of broken glass just to hear a recording of Terri Runnels’ fart. Two, I’m surprised New Jack didn’t have herpes already. And three, most importantly, Facebook is basically the world’s garbage can, whether it be Marty Jannetty dumping random pictures into the garbage can or New Jack dumping these words into the garbage can, or what have you. It just is. – Dusty
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