Stunt Granny Audio #192

This an excruciatingly special edition of Stunt Granny Audio because it features the reuniting of Jeremy, Eric and Dusty for the first time in a long, long time. And not only that, but it also features the debut of several different new features of Stunt Granny Audio, including the Top Five At Five, Match Game and the Mount Rushmore game. Can you barely contain your excitement!? They talk about the nine hour long AJ-Daniel Bryan-CM Punk segment that opened Raw, they talk about the heart warming ascent of Austin Aries, they talk about Iowa’s own Pro Wrestling Hall of Fame and who will all be there, and they talk about a whole lot more things that you can only know about if you listen to the audio. So why don’t you do that? NOW.

Stunt Granny Audio Show #192

Top 15 Pro Wrestler Commercials for Non-Wrestling Stuff

In honor of Rent-a-Center’s earth-shattering sweepstakes to meet Hulk Hogan and Troy Aikman, we thought we’d compile a list of the top 10 TV commercials starring professional wrestlers that weren’t for a professional wrestling product. These larger-than-life figures explode onto the TV screen with such abandon and fervor, such charisma and passion, that how could you *not* buy a pizza from them?

Let’s stick with the Hulkster, who hawked Right Guard in 1991 with the savoir faire of Robert Goulet and the acting chops of Mr. Belvedere. Starting this list off with anything less would be uncivilized!

Wrestlers seem to end up in commercials for food quite often. What was I saying about pizza and gargling copious amount of pills? Oh yeah, here’s Kurt Angle, following his 1996 Olympic gold medal win, ready to chow down on some Pizza Outlet:

Wow, wrestlers and pizza go together like, um, wrestling fans and bigger pizzas. Pizza Inn cashed in on the popularity of the Von Erichs in Texas in the early 1980s, but really, who in the hell is going to believe that 170-pound Mike Von Erich taught his brothers, ripped-ass Kevin and blown-up Kerry, anything about eating?

Keeping in the realm of food, I don’t have five minutes nor two scoops of Kellogg’s Eat Shit & Die for Mick Foley, but I do remember this Chef Boyardee commercial starring The Rock, pre-Hollywood but well into his puffy Nation of Domination days. Hell of a shirt, Rock; don’t date yourself too much or you might get chaffed:

Honorable mention: And because superstars’ shuckin’ and jivin’ doesn’t stop at the front door of Titan Tower, here’s Booker T and his big fat momma, eatin’ up all tha food:

I swear to sonny Jesus, this commercial with Andre the Giant made me want to try Honey Comb, and thus allowed me to become a fat shit for the first 28 years of my life:

John Cena, the face of WWE and hero to millions of children everywhere, can’t resist that double meat? Tell me he didn’t just say that!

And in the locally sold booze category: If I were you, Chicago Lake Liquors, I’d give Mad Dog Vachon a coffee break:

Of course, this wouldn’t be a discussion about great commercials with wrestlers if we didn’t include spots for Slim Jim! Here’s one with Macho Man Randy Savage and some teenagers, blowing things up Beavis and Butthead style:

And one with Ultimate Warrior and some more explosions (never let it be said that Slim Jim doesn’t understand its market; I still nice “Niiiice, antique!” every time I see a plastic chair):

More drinks: Man, the NWA/WCW got the short end of the advertising stick back in the day; while Hogan, Warrior and Savage were running wild, Rick Steiner was crawling around like a jackass with Roos on his hands:

And if you can’t land Mountain Dew like the WWF, get your first fattest babyface to drink the second-best thing!

Geez, I guess wrestlers and soda go together like wrestling fans and pizza and soda. Now here’s an idea I can get behind: Sting + population control, thanks to Sprite:

And now TNA is making deals with shitty auto insurance companies, because who better to hawk insurance you can finally pay for than wrestlers who only make $300 a week:

And finally, because we all go to our grandpa for weightlifting advice (“Back in my day, we punched a potato sack until our knuckles bled like stuck pigs! We put our polio-crippled brother on a rope and we dragged him 2 miles!”), here’s Ric Flair’s latest venture into advertising, for Fuel in a Bottle:

Oh, wait, we can’t talk about Ric Flair and TV commercials without posting Bruce Mitchell’s two favorite things in the whole world, wooin’ like Ric Flair and scratchin’ them lottery tickets:

Wow, 15 greats plus an honorable mention. Did we miss anything? Post them in a comment below!

Dan Gable Museum in Waterloo, Iowa, announces banquet participants

He could sign something for YOU!

According to its Facebook page, the National Wrestling Hall of Fame Dan Gable Museum in Waterloo, Iowa, has confirmed Mick Foley as the master of ceremonies for its hall of fame awards banquet on Saturday, July 23, as well as the banquet participants.

Mick Foley has confirmed he will be the master of ceremonies at the George Tragos/Lou Thesz Professional Wrestling Hall of Fame banquet. Confirmed participants for the banquet are Mick Foley, Terry Funk, Jim Ross, Gerald Brisco, Jim Duggan, Larry Hennig, Maurice Vachon, Jim Raschke, Danny Hodge, Dan Gable, Pat Miletich, Bob Roop, Scott Teal, and Fritz Von Goering. Order your tickets today.

Well? What in the hell are you waiting for? Dan (Zourah) and I both have our tickets, and so should you. I’m telling you, let’s get Terry Funk lit up on Jack Daniels and see if he’ll tell us some stories. It’ll be glorious. For more information on the weekend, or for information on ordering banquet tickets and professional wrestling show tickets, contact the National Wrestling Hall of Fame Dan Gable Museum at (319) 233-0745 or orders@wrestlingmuseum.org. Tell them Eric from Stunt Granny sent you, I need some cred. -Eric

Luna Vachon found dead at age 48

Oh my god: According to Prowrestling.net, Luna Vachon was found dead at her mother’s home this morning at the age of 48 (Luna, not her mom’s home). That’s sad, she was fun to watch growing up. But her backward elbow off the ropes in WWF Raw is War for SNES sucked. Her father, Butcher Vachon, and her uncle, Mad Dog Vachon, have been super cool guys every time I’ve seen them at the National Wrestling Hall of Fame Dan Gable Museum in Waterloo, Iowa, so my condolences go out to them and the rest of the Vachon family. (But not that Gabgrel; Jeremy thinks Gangrel’s evil twin did it.) -Eric

So apparently this had some sort of impact since we both wrote something and I am not wasting the five minutes I spent writing this up by not posting my thoughts.
It’s another dead wrestler, Luna Vachon passed away at the age of 48. I honestly want to care about so many wrestlers or ex-wrestlers kicking the bucket but when it gets to the point where it is news when a month goes by and two of them didn’t die it is rather difficult. Sure this is sad for her family and the two children she leaves behind but for the rest of us this is a shoulder shrugger of a story.  So rest in peace Luna.  -Jeremy

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