Stunt Granny Audio #243

A-diamond-in-the-roughOh holy crap, Dusty and Kevin are back once again to lay down some serious opinionz for your listening pleasure. They start out by trying to recreate the magic of their off-air conversation about ROH and pro wrestling in general. Are Adam Cole and Jay Briscoe the only diamonds in the ROH rough? How would their skills translate in the major leagues? Was WWE justified in getting rid of Chris Hero? Does Dusty believe that having good talent on your roster is a good thing?

Then they turn their attention to the big “real sports” story of the day: Dan Lebatard giving his Baseball Hall of Fame to Deadspin.com. Kevin stays out of the way as Dusty rails against the holier than thou baseball writers that have been torching his hero the last couple days. Is the voting process flawed? How can real change be effected? How do we know who did and didn’t use steroids when Alex bleeping Sanchez tested positive for it? Dusty has a proposal for the Carolina Panthers to counter the 49ers’ use of Ric Flair before their victory over the Green Bay Packers last week. They also talk briefly about the NFL coaching carousel and it will only take about an hour of your life, so listen to it or else you might lose your vote!

#ROH IS The Worst Part XI

manchester-arena-wrestlingOkay, Ring of Honor would never play an arena this size but it’s what I got when I typed in “arena floor plan wrestling” into Google. I had to go that route after “DuBurns Arena Floor plan” didn’t come up with anything useful. DuBurns Arena has no page on Wikipedia. The best I can do is the Coppermine Restaurant at Du Burns Arena on Facebook. They record at a fancy spot. Woof. The floor plan above will work as a nice tool though to describe what Ring of Honor did wrong now. They did do something right though. But let’s save the good news for after the bad news. I’m that kind of guy.

ROH was back in Du Burns Arena to tape some episodes. Normally, their floor plan would have their walk way through areas H and J then the entrance ramp would be at the large aisle between sections 116 & 117. The set up made it looks pretty full for an arena of well, probably no more than 3,000 since that was the size of the place they played here in Columbus. ROH decided to switch it up for the big match up between Matt Hardy and Jay Briscoe. They placed the entrance ramp in section 114 with a very short aisle to the ring. I have a problem with my example now because it doesn’t convey the tightness of the length of the aisle. Just pretend that the second deck isn’t there and section 114 is about half the size. The WWE has a similar set up when they go to Madison Square Garden. I don’t like that set up but it doesn’t bother me for one reason that became glaringly obvious when ROH used camera angles that weren’t the hard camera. The WWE packs MSG full so no matter what angle they film from, it’s a packed house. For whatever reason, ROH used more non-hard camera angle shots than I can remember in any other broadcast. The main problem as you can guess by now was that the crowd in sections 109-119 was sparse at best. So ROH did it’s best to point out that an arena that is likely in the 3,000 seat area was not full. Even TNA isn’t this stupid. To compound the problems, it seemed that they acknowledged this problem by filming really close up to the wrestlers to minimize the amount of crowd seen. I have close up filming in movies and wrestling because you lose context. ROH is the worst.

The good news? Even though ROH was dumb enough to leave their title belt on Jay Briscoe who was leaving the company (dumb) but they did two smart things. They didn’t put the strap around Fat Hardy’s waist. The other upside was that SCUM beat down Mark & Jay Briscoe before they were booted from the company. TNA wasn’t smart enough to with DOC recently so we need to give ROH an “Atta boy” pet every now and again. -Kevin

Briscoes spotted at WWE house show

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Let the rampant speculation begin!

Vince McMahon has always been a fan of backwoods hillbillies, so this signing makes perfect sense even though tag team wrestling in WWE is old and tag team wrestling in WWE is dead. – Dusty

News You Can Use: The Briscoes, CM Punk & Zack Ryder’s Buddy

Big_OI’m sure I will be spoiling a total of one person’s day by linking to a report on Prowrestling.net with the ROH spoilers from their most recent taping. Jay & Mark Briscoe are officially gone “indefinitely” from ROH. Mark is gone because of wounds from fighting Jay at Best In The World and Jay is gone because of an attack from S.C.U.M. I could turn this paragraph into another “ROH Is The Worst” article for letting a second champion walk off with a belt but I’m going to look at the silver lining. We’ll either get Fat Hardy or fat Kevin Steen as our new champion.

Another report says that CM Punk has filed a restraining order against his mother because she has harassed him for money. If you’ve ever seen Broke in the ESPN 30 for 30 series, you know Punk did the right thing. The guy has already handed her $100,000 according to TMZ. If you start dropping cash like pipe bombs, she’s never going to stop asking for money. After he cut her off, Punk says that she threatened to kill herself on several occasions. The restraining order wouldn’t be needed if that happens. She is also threatening to release information about Punk’s arrests from his time in high school. Isn’t that called blackmail? Punk wishes that he could just block her like some slob on Twitter who keeps telling him he wouldn’t have been champion for 434 days if it weren’t for The Shield.

In the last piece of news, Adam “The Big O” Ohriner will be on Gut Check tonight. Considering that TNA likes big, immobile men like Rob Terry, “The Big O” will be perfect for their roster. Unfortunately for him even if he wins Gut Check, he’ll get less air time on Impact Wrestling than he did on “Z True Long Island Story”. -Kevin

#WatchROH – Aired 18 February 2012

This is what I thought Jimmy Jacobs looked like attacking Kevin Steen.

We start off with review of Kyle O’Reilly against Eddie Edwards. I think this Baltimore crowd has seen more tapings than a PWO crowd. Kevin Kelly tells us we’re out of a main event because Shelton Benjamin hasn’t paid his fine yet. Charlie Haas comes out. Haas says Briscoe ran into the chair. Charlie said that he’ll wrestle. The Briscoes hit the ring. The crowd isn’t tired of chanting “Man up!” Jim Cornette comes out. Mark Briscoe is going to take him. Jay agrees to be handcuffed to the ring post. Their commercials promoting their next live event are hysterically bad.

Cheese and rice. They show footage from Kevin Steen interrupting Mike Mondo and someone. Andy Ridge is Kevin Steen‘s opponent tonight. Steen suckers in Ridge with a hand shake. According to Steve Corino (I think) wrestling has never seen anything like Steen before. Corino defends Steen’s fatness by saying he has good cardio. Steen power bombed Ridge on the ring apron. Steen wins with an F5. It was hilarious with Corino trying to make Steen sound evil with the crowd chanting. Steve Corino got into the ring. Jimmy Jacobs made the save. Hilarious watching someone so small attack him. Jacobs wants a piece of Steen.

Veda Scott is interviewing Davey Richards and Kyle O’Reilly. They sucked. They’re over stuff and wrong wolves got picked. Mike Mondo & Matt Taven were set to take on Eddie Edwards & Adam Cole. Taven was the someone from above that got attacked by Steen. Cole and Taven start the match. Cole looks pretty sharp. I don’t think I’ve seen him so far this year.Mondo got Edwards riled up and paid for it. Mondo took over after Taven had turned things around on Edwards. Eddie got the hot tag to Cole. The crowd isn’t into him much. Cole needs to get rid of the tropical island on the trunks. Mondo & Taven collide. Kevin Kelly yells “What is that?” as Nigel matter of factly says “A German Suplex”. Kelly is an idiot as he says he needs to find out the name of the move after. Mondo attacks Taven after the match.

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The best wrestling promo of the year so far

IMO. – Dusty

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