The Art of Wrestling: Halloween Costume Ideas

HalloweenWrestlerGirlsI tried to acquire my Halloween picture from my parents earlier this year that had my younger brother & I dressed as the Bushwhackers. I was unsuccessful after looking through a trunk full of pictures. It will be found and used eventually. For now, you get these lovely ladies above. I did see on Wellyourewrong’s Instagram a fantastic picture of a new group of ladies dressed as the Wyatt Family. Maybe it’ll be in a Google search next year. TNA & the WWE both had Halloween Specials going on. Of course ROH didn’t have this section because their whole promotion is a trick on wrestling fans the world over. Let’s figure out which outfits will get the least amount of treats for your children.

TNA has a formula for their sixteen costumes. With that still massive roster, one would think they’d be able to provide more choices. Aces & Eights have two choices along with Bully Ray having his own separate costume. That makes sense since they’re down to two members and Bully Ray in the group. Jeff Hardy is the only single wrestler with multiple costumes. He’s got 3. Considering that his fans are “The Creatures of the Night” it is fitting. That means that TNA really only has thirteen real costumes. Back to the TNA formula. It’s shirt and two accessories. Some of these don’t help you look anything like the wrestler illustrated.

Like the Mickie James costume which comes with your very own Somebody’s Gonna Pay CD. I’m not that willing to help out Mickie or TNA to unload their over abundance of terrible country music even at a 50% discount. How about including some Mickie James booty shorts? You’re trying to sell us, well, Tits N’ Ass and Halloween has become a slutty holiday for women. TNA could even crop the shirt like Mickie liked to do.

mickie-james TNA Ref

Maybe I don’t want female wrestling fans dressing like this.

Some of the costumes do help you look like the wrestler, like the pair of Aces & Eights costumes. Nothing quite says bad ass like either a beer cozy or that mask like device that Knux used to wear. If that doesn’t say tough guy to you yet, they add in a snazzy ball cap that is sure to impress the boys in your crew. If those aren’t you’re bottle of beer, you could choose to go with the leather wrist band, chain wallet and bandana. If you’re the leader of your crew though, I’m sure the Bully Ray package will make you the top dawg. You know you’ll show your boys real biker style when you get the Bully Ray trucker hat. Your other boys bandana is too frilly to. Show that girl that simple is the style with this bandana with only the Aces & Eights logo. Lest anyone question your credibility, just point down to your shirt and tell them you’re from Hell’s Kitchen, bitch.

My favorite package though has to be from ODB. It’s because I’m sure I could find uses for the ODB flask. The wife beater with the hand prints is something I could be stupid enough to wear during Halloween. I would get use out of the flask that night for sure. After Halloween is over, that beater can just be worn under your gym shirt and no one will be the wiser. The best part of it is that this combo is only $18.99.

If TNA isn’t quite your speed, WWEshop.com has Halloween gear for you too. They also have some useful and not so useful packages. They also have less choices than TNA which is flat weird. They are all for the AJ Lee, CM Punk, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, John Cena, Randy Orton, Rey Mysterio, Sheamus and the Wyatt Family. That’s a pretty weak choice selection.

Of course, I did omit two choices on purpose. But eleven choices is still really weak. Like the ladies on the top of the post, they have two old school costumes, neither of which the ladies are wearing. You could snag a Sergeant Slaughter kit which comes with fake muscles. I’m not sure why since good ole’ Sarge never was much of one to hit the weight room, unless you count his days on G.I. Joe. At least it’s adult sized so that old people can recognize your costume because the WWE’s target audience is going to have no clue. If you want to go old school for your child though, they provide you with a mini-Undertaker costume. The WWE is nice enough to add foam lapels to the black jacket. I can understand getting a foam chest with this costume. The last piece to this costume is the wide brimmed hat. It’s just too bad that the WWE didn’t include the hair extensions or else this costume would be worth kidnapping a little person like Los Matadores did and dressing them up for only $24.99.

GI Joe Sgt SlaughterIf you want to “Follow the Buzzards” though, it’s time to get the ultimate Wyatt Family package. You get a t shirt, straw fedora, a sheep’s mask and a lantern. This is a two person costume package because you can’t wear a fedora and sheep’s mask at the same time. The WWE also provides a separate sale for a red beard if you want to make sure your partner in crime looks like Erick Rowan. Considering all of the corporate tie ins the WWE has, I’m not sure why they went with a cheap lantern. They could have talked to Coleman to sell a special WWE sponsored look for those of you who like to go out and camp. It’s also look more like the one that Bray Wyatt uses coming down to the ring. The WWE could have at least made it green to come closer. They also could have really made this a three person package by including a stained wife beater and handkerchief so that someone could look like Luke Harper.

I could go through all of both TNA & WWE’s choices, but I’m going to make like a ghost and disappear from this article. Happy Halloween! – Kevin

Stunt Granny Audio #230

Whatever.

Whatever.

Jeremy and Kevin are back for the second week in a row. How very nice of them to do this to get traffic to the website they created with Dusty and Eric. Why is the quality of the audio low? Did it have to do with Kevin spilling water on his lap top during his Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of Raw? They start by talking about TNA’s long delayed roster game. Can they rattle off all of the people that have been released? Devon, Mickie James and  Do they complain about any of the releases? Is TNA still too heavy on talent? What are the chances that Hulk Hogan leaves when his contract is up on October 1? Would that be good for TNA’s business? They move on to one last big name that asked for his release, Matt Morgan. Is there any chance that he comes back to the WWE? Has enough time elapsed that WWE has made their intentions known? Jeremy & Kevin moved on to the WWE where Daniel Bryan is still the main topic of conversation. How hard is it to rip on an angle when crowds are hot and super into Bryan? Are the guys still okay with this continued evil management regime? Or has the WWE screwed up being evil with their actions involving Randy Orton? Speaking of Mr. Orton, how well did the Miz’s “parents” sell his beating? Who wants his “dad” to keep his hairdo? Will it come back into style? Did they pass up talking about his “mom’s” 80’s hair puff? Who brought the show to a grinding halt comparing the Raw crowd compared to the shots of the crowd for Impact Wrestling in Cleveland by site favorite Aaron Maguire? Find out that and more in the link below!

TNA Making Smart Decision Letting Talent Leave

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There is actual text below

Now I may have been out of touch for a few weeks between vacation and moving so some blanks need to be filled in. Someone please tell me when TNA started making correct decisions?

Over the course of a few weeks they have parted ways with some of their named talent after releasing a string of less than spectacular named talent. First Devon was let go. Then last Thursday Ken Anderson was given the stretcher job and seemingly written off television. Word soon comes out that both sides were negotiating a deal but as of now nothing has been worked out. Finally on Monday comes word Mickie James is on the way out as well after contract terms were not worked out.

Normally this would be a cause for uproar because Mickie James is ridiculously talented as well as being one handsome lass. But what has Mickie James, Ken Anderson or Devon done in or for TNA? They were just faces on an already crowded roster on a severely condensed television program. This isn’t placing blame, it is just stating the obvious. TNA has a long history of mismanaging their talent. Talent from WWE was always held in a higher regard. Once they arrived on TNA television the hype died after a few weeks and they were just another face. All the while talent is collecting a decent check, a check TNA shouldn’t be writing.

Somewhere, someone must have realized it may be it was the constant money loss? Maybe Dad figured it is time to treat it as a real company instead of a vanity project for his little missy. Regardless of the reason the decision to let talent go is a smart move. Cut costs and cut costs with a plan.

Devon put over the idea of the Main Event Mafia. Ken Anderson put over the authority of Bubba Ray. Mickie James put over ODB as she dropped the Knockouts Championship. They didn’t disappear or get written off as an afterthought. It showed there was some sort of planning to go along with the decisions made by personnel. It is quite the shocking development.

Hell, TNA even extended AJ Styles contract. This means even if he doesn’t resign long-term with TNA he can put over Bubba Ray and further cement Bubba’s legitimacy. TNA took a potentially embarrassing situation, like the Bound For Glory Series winner walking out on them and turned it around. What the hell is going on here?

You don’t have to agree with the personnel moves made by TNA management. Sure we all want to see Mickie James on a weekly basis. Sure there are some of us who think Ken Anderson may still blossom. Both things could still happen but responsible spending has to be TNA priority right now. Planning it out and executing it correctly are essential. Lately TNA has done just that. – Jeremy

Stunt Granny Audio #228

The type of young athlete TNA needs to be pushing.

The type of young athlete TNA needs to be pushing.

There’s a whole heap of things to talk about this week, and Kevin and Dusty are the only people adequately prepared to do so! And boy do they ever, starting off with some Monday Night Raw discussion. Dusty is sick of having McMahon family reunions on his television screen. Kevin is confused by the whole thing and wonders if they really think they’re knocking it out of the park with these segments. Dusty is also sick of Michael Cole on commentary, and Jerry Lawler as well, but has no idea how to fix that problem. Is there anyone from another wrestling company worth bringing in? Should WWE look outside the wrestling business?

Then they turn their attention to the mess that is TNA. How long can a company be going out of business before actually going out of business? Do they realize how bad they look by getting rid of so many people and then teasing a surprise appearance for the next show? Did a throwaway reality show really beat their show in the ratings? Did Dixie Carter really call Taeler Hendrix fat? Does she prefer that Angelina Love 35 pounds look? Does she realize Mickie James isn’t exactly a size zero right now herself? Also, the Main Event Mafia is a stale idea that means nothing to anyone, it’s really hard to feel bad for Samoa Joe, James Storm should be in WWE, and a whole lot more! We don’t think you’re too heavy to listen to it, so go for it!

Kevin’s Blog: #ImpactLive Destination X

Special-EditionSince it’s Destination X, I decided to bust out the lap top. I had intended to start this earlier but life got in the way. A trip to the lady’s house then some Hawaiian BBQ delayed it. Here it comes now. Let’s roll.

They start with a nice retrospective on Chris Sabin‘s career. What X Division won’t take this chance? I doubt that Sabin comes out of this show with the belt though. Too much riding on Bully Ray in my eyes. Then again, I would have said the same thing about D.O.C. until the news earlier this week. Since Bully Ray has mic skills, he gets to come to the ring. He cares so little for his opponent, he calls out Brooke Hogan. She’s sick of his games. Well then divorce him dummy. You can hire a lawyer easier than he can. Ray, you’ve got no power to stay married to her other than her incompetence. Hulk Hogan makes the same argument Brooke did. The Main Event Mafia shows up for no reason. Not exactly starting the show well. Bobby Roode says “Fluke”. The future starts tonight. Decent enough.

Roode is taking on his old partner, Austin Aries with a fresh facial hair look. Watching even the beginning of this match, it makes me think that Austin Aries could break the size barrier like CM Punk & Daniel Bryan have. Commercial. Roode has turned himself into a good wrestler. I still think his mic skills lag behind though so I’m less sure of his WWE chances. Aries has the mic down. Brainbuster for an Aries win. Oh no, is Roode getting a losing streak gimmick? I think the right guy won but I usually don’t like where these stories go. For now, I’ll enjoy his little freak out. Homicide talks to Hernandez. Chavo Guerrero gives him respect. Hernandez does the least talking. Smart move again. I feel like grading every segment for some reason.

Ken Anderson gets to address D.O.C. leaving. He hand over his cut. He then gives a pep talk. Woof. Homicide is taking on Sonjay Dutt and Petey Williams. They’ve been behind Dutt more recently so I’ll expect him to win. The Gringo Killer and Canadian Destroyer are two cool finishers. Sonjay saves Petey after the Killer. Moonsault Double Foot Stomp for Dutt. Wow, what a move.

Kenny King takes on Suicide and Chavo Guerrero. King has been a favorite since his move over from ROH. A baby face won the first match, I’m going with him for the win. Oh that’s right, it’s Manic now. I’ve never been quite sure why guys who stop in the ropes stay there for so long. Manic air balls on a cross pin but Chavo rolls thru anyway. Barely anyone cheers for Chavo. King showing off the athleticism. Manic wins with an inverted Code Breaker. I think that’s the right description. The Main Event Mafia is fired up. Glad they’re taking a break from the X Division matches. Back to back was a bit much.

Chris Sabin gets a talk from Hulk Hogan. He tells him it’s his time for greatness. Sabin thanks Hulk. A reason Sabin wouldn’t survive in the WWE. Do I really have to listen to this dreck that Sting will start? Um, Aces & Eights is there. If you’re looking for them, why haven’t you found them yet? They’ve had a couple of segments. Kurt Angle gets his chance to suck. Magnus is ready. That’s all you’ve got after I pimped you last week? If you’re going to take the fight to them, you don’t call them out. Ken Anderson invites them backstage. Samoa Joe with a cameo from Rampage Jackson is the closing suck. Aces & Eights ambushed them. What a bunch of dumb baby faces.

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Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of #TNA #ImpactWrestling

repeater_300dpiI’m repeating my weekend travel plans from last week except I’m going for my girl’s grandmother’s 92nd birthday. So in order to clean off the DVR, let’s roll.

I forgot that they were going to be at IUP. James Storm is in the ring. AJ Styles is in the stands. Bad Influence joins them. I do like their sales pitch. Aces & Eights are beating up Storm again. The rest of the people who have been beat up suck. Joseph Park sucks the least. 3D thru the table so he can feel his Abyss roots.

Aces & Eights are still in the ring so that they can suck the energy out of the room. They beat up all of our heroes. Why didn’t they deliver that promo before the break? It was a short promo then you reset after the commercial break. Tazz tried to sound tough before another commercial break. Yep, thanks for making two segments suck instead of one.

Taryn Terrell is fighting Tara. The only thing catching my attention are Tazz & Tenay fighting like sixth graders. Then Tazz notes that ODB is sober. Yep, they let Taryn hang around to get the cheap pin when Tara got cocky. Always a decent way to build up a babyface without hurting the heel. People don’t care.

Rob Terry is taking on Jesse. I feel bad for this crowd. What did they do to deserve this? Robbie E saves Jesse from a pin. Weird spine buster type move for the win by Terry. Woof.

Bad Influence tries to recruit Bobby Roode. We get reruns of Jeff Hardy losing. Good for Chris Sabin coming back. He’s a tough cookie.

Austin Aries confronts Bobby Roode about getting Fortune back together. He makes several good points himself. I guess they’re gunning for the World Tag Team Titles. Chavo & Hernandez have the belts but seem like after thoughts in this match. The baby faces get to take advantage of an arguing team. Wow, Hernandez looked like he may have hurt himself. I’m not surprised. The match has been pretty good as a over all though. Kaz runs interference. Daniels interference back fires. Frog Splash win.

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Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of #TNA #ImpactWrestling

LetsTrySomethingNew

Well, this isn’t something new but it is a new post. I have another one to finish up but it requires more thought than this type of article. I also need to get this off my DVR because I’m traveling to Altoona PA this weekend. Let’s roll.

We start with the 2 young male escorts Wes Brisco and Garrett Bischoff against Kurt Angle. They do a solid job of reminding us what the feud is about. AS usual nothing happens before a commercial break in a match. That was a hell of a bump for Bischoff to take on the double German suplex. Bischoff nails Angle with the chain for the win. This is stupid. Even my girl agrees. Nice of them to swipe The Shield’s move. Ken Anderson gets to babble. I can’t believe I liked him at some point.

Zema Ion and Petey Williams take on Kenny King for the X Division. I can’t stop staring at the referee’s hat to know what’s going on in the ring. I do like the X cam but I’m not sure why it looks so washed out. Oh, that’s the camera. I’m not paying much attention in general. They’re making Petey look pretty awesome. Ha. Cheap win by King. I feel bad for Ion. Brutus Magnus is going for the TV Title. Solid work from him as usual. I like his under statement.

Christy Hemme and Brooke Hogan are getting ready to launch the new Knockout’s website and photos. Brooke then talks down to Mickie James and Brook Tessmacher. Devon comes out first for some reason. Magnus gets attacked on the ramp by Mike Knox & DOC. This one trick pony is old. Aces & Eights aren’t really getting heat. Samoa Joe makes the save but why did they walk away? Kick his ass too.

Part of the reason to write this column is to rip on Tazz. He has surpassed Mike Tenay for worst announcer in wrestling. Having to act like a heel is not working for him in any way. He never sounds genuine. Samoa Joe is pissed. This AJ Styles thing isn’t interesting either. I don’t care which side he’s on. He’s not that big of a deal. I like him but whatever. Velvet Sky is selling an injury? Is this real? I don’t care enough to look up whether it’s real. ODB didn’t get any promo time for this match. Tessmacher then Mickie James. Forgot ODB was the ref. Why is Mickie looking like she wants to fight ODB? You can’t start rotating thru female refs this quickly. I like ODB ordering them back into the ring. Regular referees should be that stern. The Thesz Press off the top is always a like awkward. Tazz not having a come back to Tenay seals the deal on why he’s such a bitch now. You’re a tough guy compared to your partners. Bully them. Mickey reverses a reverse for the win. Solid match. Kaz and Christopher Daniels are moderately funny. Joseph Park gets attacked by Bully Ray. He gives us a sexist sentence. He’s a lawyer who isn’t going to press charges? Ironic. I wonder if they’re trying to do the same thing once every 15 minutes or 30.

Mickie James put together a good promo which is strange. It was never her strong suit. James Storm reminds us that this angle has taken entirely too long. Daniels & Kaz are back. Daniels said something. Kaz wants the tag team titles back. Austin Aries & Bobby Roode are still stuck in tag team hell because Aces & Eights are over bearing. Chavo & Hernandez clear the ring. Snooze.

So Jeff Hardy is really hurt? Roode has turned himself into a good talker. Matt Morgan is gloating again. Is he supposed to be turning baby face? He wants to take on Bully Ray but that cocky ass is so heelish. Why didn’t Aces & Eights just attack Samoa Joe too? Devon is a bad sergeant at arms. Tazz says people hate his guts because of his opinions. No, we hate you because you suck. Brisco distracts the ref. Anderson brass knuckles Samoa Joe. Devon makes the pin. It’s like clock work.

AJ Styles tries to run out of the match. James Storm attacks him on the ramp to stop him. Both men are wearing black. Aces & Eights wear black. Let’s try and make this product even more bland. AJ’s look is a little sheep dog for me. I do like a change for him though. It’d be kind of funny if he joined Kaz & Daniels. Storm taps to a sharp shooter type move. I know it has a name that I don’t remember. AJ Styles leaves Storm alone to catch a beating. Kaz & Daniels get an ass kicking too. Bully Ray delivers a fine enough promo but I don’t care because he became boring the minute he joined Aces & Eights. Dumb. It limits him way too much. He was better without this crew. They’re dragging him down. -Kevin

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