Barry Windham hospitalized after stroke, makes me feel old

barry windham

I'm actually not sure who won this match.

According to Prowrestling.net, Barry Windham has been hospitalized after suffering a stroke. You can read the full story and see Windham’s doughy, mustachioed face at Slam Sports (that Canadian Web site) (damn, he looks more and more like his dad every time I see him).

Of course I want Windham to make a speedy recovery. My biggest concern, though, is how old  this is making me feel. It was one thing when 35-year-old wrestlers were dying when I was 19. But now the older, somehow healthier generation (Windham, the Briscos, etc.) are starting to sell the farm, guys I grew up watching when I was 4, 5, 6 years old. I remember renting WrestleMania 1 on VHS and being wowed by someone the size of Windham throwing such a mean dropkick, and then, three years and 10 pounds later, turning heel on Lex Luger and joining the Four Horsemen. Well, one year and another 20 pounds after that, Windham jumped back to the WWF, where he became a jobber known as “The Widowmaker.” Ugh. That was almost as bad as “The Stalker,” the 1996 WWF character played by an approximately 400-pound Windham…

Wait, he had a stroke? No way.

Anyway, here’s to a speedy recovery to a wrestler of which I have plenty of fond memories and a shared weight fluctuation problem. Time to drown my sorrows in a bucket of Blue Bunny moose tracks. -Eric

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Maryse out for hernia surgery, still smokes like brisket

Hotter than bathtub water

As you may recall, Maryse recently filed for an order of protection against me a stalker who offered to take her to heaven with him. Well, according to Prowrestling.net, Maryse just announced she’s taking time off to have surgery on an abdominal hernia, which she either received from lifting that restraining order against me that guy or from being so sexy that even her ab muscles tried to hop out of her body to look at her. From her Twitter:

allo guys i wont be going physical for awhile, im getting abdominal hernia surgery

Words words words and more words, but really, just store at the picture above in your spank bank until she returns. Either that or make like Travis from East Coast Audio and check out Vickie Guerrero a time or two. Hey, you can’t know good until you’ve experienced bad. -Eric

Maryse files for order of protection… wow, what is that bikini bottom, a Band-Aid?

Now seriously, who would stalk *this*?

According to Prowrestling.net, WWE Diva Maryse has filed for an order of protection against a man she’s calling a “crazy stalker.” I’M NOT CRAZY!

Maryse alleges that 61 year-old Lee Silber has sent her threatening letters and left more than 50 voice mails on her cell phone. Silber offered to give Maryse a six-figure payoff and a 100 carat diamond ring to prove he is her friend.

I also don’t look 61, either.

Look, Maryse is hotter than donut grease, but are we ever going to come to a day and age when even the craziest of the crazies don’t think of stalking as the appropriate way to make friends and meet people? I mean, sure, I slept outside Jim Ross’ hotel room door at the Ramada in Waterloo, Iowa, this past weekend, but that was only in case he had an emergency or needed a foot massage, nothing weird. -Eric

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