Kevin’s Blog: #ImpactLive Destination X

Special-EditionSince it’s Destination X, I decided to bust out the lap top. I had intended to start this earlier but life got in the way. A trip to the lady’s house then some Hawaiian BBQ delayed it. Here it comes now. Let’s roll.

They start with a nice retrospective on Chris Sabin‘s career. What X Division won’t take this chance? I doubt that Sabin comes out of this show with the belt though. Too much riding on Bully Ray in my eyes. Then again, I would have said the same thing about D.O.C. until the news earlier this week. Since Bully Ray has mic skills, he gets to come to the ring. He cares so little for his opponent, he calls out Brooke Hogan. She’s sick of his games. Well then divorce him dummy. You can hire a lawyer easier than he can. Ray, you’ve got no power to stay married to her other than her incompetence. Hulk Hogan makes the same argument Brooke did. The Main Event Mafia shows up for no reason. Not exactly starting the show well. Bobby Roode says “Fluke”. The future starts tonight. Decent enough.

Roode is taking on his old partner, Austin Aries with a fresh facial hair look. Watching even the beginning of this match, it makes me think that Austin Aries could break the size barrier like CM Punk & Daniel Bryan have. Commercial. Roode has turned himself into a good wrestler. I still think his mic skills lag behind though so I’m less sure of his WWE chances. Aries has the mic down. Brainbuster for an Aries win. Oh no, is Roode getting a losing streak gimmick? I think the right guy won but I usually don’t like where these stories go. For now, I’ll enjoy his little freak out. Homicide talks to Hernandez. Chavo Guerrero gives him respect. Hernandez does the least talking. Smart move again. I feel like grading every segment for some reason.

Ken Anderson gets to address D.O.C. leaving. He hand over his cut. He then gives a pep talk. Woof. Homicide is taking on Sonjay Dutt and Petey Williams. They’ve been behind Dutt more recently so I’ll expect him to win. The Gringo Killer and Canadian Destroyer are two cool finishers. Sonjay saves Petey after the Killer. Moonsault Double Foot Stomp for Dutt. Wow, what a move.

Kenny King takes on Suicide and Chavo Guerrero. King has been a favorite since his move over from ROH. A baby face won the first match, I’m going with him for the win. Oh that’s right, it’s Manic now. I’ve never been quite sure why guys who stop in the ropes stay there for so long. Manic air balls on a cross pin but Chavo rolls thru anyway. Barely anyone cheers for Chavo. King showing off the athleticism. Manic wins with an inverted Code Breaker. I think that’s the right description. The Main Event Mafia is fired up. Glad they’re taking a break from the X Division matches. Back to back was a bit much.

Chris Sabin gets a talk from Hulk Hogan. He tells him it’s his time for greatness. Sabin thanks Hulk. A reason Sabin wouldn’t survive in the WWE. Do I really have to listen to this dreck that Sting will start? Um, Aces & Eights is there. If you’re looking for them, why haven’t you found them yet? They’ve had a couple of segments. Kurt Angle gets his chance to suck. Magnus is ready. That’s all you’ve got after I pimped you last week? If you’re going to take the fight to them, you don’t call them out. Ken Anderson invites them backstage. Samoa Joe with a cameo from Rampage Jackson is the closing suck. Aces & Eights ambushed them. What a bunch of dumb baby faces.

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Stunt Granny Audio Show #224

wrestling_fan_wedding cakeJeremy & Kevin had a plan, but they didn’t follow it to start the show. Why wouldn’t they start by talking about the marriage of Natalya Neidhart and Tyson Kidd? Maybe because one of the hosts thinks that they were really cousins? Maybe because the other host thinks it’s incest? Is the WWE giving the Divas a proper hype as they prepare to unveil Totally Divas on E! Entertainment? Jeremy & Kevin move back to their plan by talking about CM Punk, Curtis Axel and Paul Heyman. Is CM Punk in the same no man’s land as a baby face like Dolph Ziggler? How do their situations differ? CM Punk and Paul Heyman are doing well in their roles, but how is Curtis Axel doing? How does Brock Lesnar figure into this situation? Would he ever interfere in the Money In The Bank match? The guys stumble back off the beaten path and talk about Kane. Is this latest effort with Daniel Bryan cementing his place in the WWE Hall of Fame? Jeremy & Kevin then tackle the Suicide escapade in Impact Wrestling. Which one of your hosts is too lazy to even read the spoilers for this week’s show? Which one has no idea what really took place on Impact? Can anyone really blame him? How smart is Austin Aries? They finish up the show by talking about the Wyatt Family. What are their names aside from Bray Wyatt? Who are they going to start them off against? Would they make a proper impact against 3MB? Join this two man band for an audio experience.

Stunt Granny Audio Show #224

Interview with Nancy Benoit’s sister

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I found this on The2count.com.  I find her to be very well spoken. – Dusty

He did seem to love Nancy very dearly. We know that, unfortunately, their relationship started to get rocky at some point. When did you first get wind that things were turning complicated between them?

I lived in Atlanta and my sister asked me home almost every one of my days off. I want to be clear: Chris was not an abusive husband. But there were, what we call in the industry, though don’t often talk about, “high spots”. She had been there, in that position before, and refused to put up with it at all, especially with Daniel in their home. So I went with her after one of these “incidents” to file an order of protection.

What do you mean by “high spots”?

Yelling, screaming, name calling, shoving, pushing, breaking stuff.

Did Nancy ever mention anything about fearing for her or Daniel’s safety?

Yes, when she first filed for divorce.

In 2003, Nancy filed for divorce citing cruel treatment and an irrevocably broken marriage. She also filed a restraining order against Chris. She later dropped the proceedings as well as the restraining order. Why did she do that?

Because, like with any marriage where there are issues, they made up and wanted to reconcile, especially for Daniel.

It was reported that Daniel suffered from Fragile X syndrome and that he was being given human growth hormones. Was Daniel’s health an issue in Nancy and Chris’ disagreements?

Daniel did not have Fragile X. I have his medical records. He was NOT sick.

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Sean Waltman Is Fucking Gross, A Tragedy

One of these men has Hepatitis C.

From Meltzer:

Sean Waltman, who is still working indie dates even with Hepatitis C, was on the Cowhead show in Tampa and said TNA won’t use him due to liability issues. He said he didn’t know how he got the disease, but said he had a lot of unprotected sex in his lifetime. He talked more about his suicide attempt a few years ago, saying that he got depressed, attacked his girlfriend Alicia Webb. He then got even more depressed, took Valium and drank a bottle of Bacardi and tried to hang himself. Webb found him right before he was about to die, and saved his life, giving him CPR under the paramedics arrived. Webb, who was his valet in AAA and worked in WWF as Ryan Shamrock, the sister of Ken Shamrock. Vince Russo wanted to book an incest angle between the two of them in the late 90s, but Ken turned it down, which was one of the reasons he got depushed. Then, as seems to always happen in wrestling, Webb and Ken became an item.

Once again, why would you even hire a person like this? What the hell is wrong with TNA? – Dusty

TNA Destination X Review

That shit was terrible Mildred.

That shit was terrible Mildred.

Oh sweet Jesus! Since Eric and Dusty actually covered the preview portion of TNA’s Destination X PPV, it is now up to Kevin and Jeremy to suffer through reviewing it. Yes, K & J go over the entire event as long as they could and try not to sound too negative. It doesn’t always work but the effort is there. They discuss what can possibly be placed at the top of the “all time worst skits ever” with ODB and a bunch of jackoffs. They also talk about Suicide winning the TNA X-Division belt. There is also some progressive talk about how TNA can change and why they should change for the better starting immediately. They also talk about the small positives of the show. They include AJ Styles, um…. wait, um…there are others but I forgot already. I promise there are more so it is worth listening to since we took the time to watch this shit and then talk about it. -Jeremy

TNA’s Destination X 2009 Review

The Art of Wrestling – I Want To Commit Suicide

TNA dropped a nice little present in my lap by finally debuting the new shirts they had a preview of back when I posted this article.  I’ll look at all three in separate articles but wanted to start with the splashiest headline which of course was for Suicide’s new shirt.

I stopped looking for a more creative frame after 10 pages of images from Google.

I stopped looking for a more creative frame after 10 pages of images from Google.

On the front, TNA has created a frame around Suicide’s mask that compliments the shapes of the mask and doesn’t draw too much attention to itself by replacing white with a light gray.  The mask itself is simplistic and reminds me a bit of Chapel from Youngblood.  As I continually note, contrast is a good thing and a black shirt with a white mask certainly more than fits the bill.  The red could be a tad brighter but it’s just fine the way it has been designed.

On the back,  is Suicide’s symbols with the word Suicide replaced by TNA’s logo.  (If you want to see an image of Suicide, go here, head to the “iMPACT!” photos, 2009 photos, February and then IMG_2644.  TNA has somehow made their site harder to navigate than the WWE. )  Logo creep sucks and this version of it is especially egregious.   First, the TNA logo comes in front of Suicide’s which is wrong.  To make it pop, TNA is in a lighter red color and really overshadows Suicide’s logo.  The Suicide logo works quite well on his costume because the Suicide lettering is in white against a red and black background which makes the logo creep really awful.

I do like one child friendly aspect of this shirt, it’s glow in the dark.  Here’s that picture.  It becomes really simple and looks pretty neat but it does remind me too much of DX.  The WWE should have done this for Jeff Hardy’s new shirt.  Don’t worry, I’ll get to that shirt too.  I’ll wrap it up by saying, I wouldn’t commit Suicide if someone bought this shirt. – Kevin

Yes She Is Still Alive.

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You can file this under, “Wait, she’s still alive?” Joanie Lauer, or as the rest of us know her, Chyna, was taken to the hospital Saturday morning after her “alcohol did not mix well with her prescription meds” according to TMZ. You know, the bastion of all things proper and right with news.

The best part about this story is that she was too drunk to even pass a pysch evaluation. I’ve had plenty of those moments but they usually end by chasing Kevin down the desolate and dirty streets of Columbus as he peels off his clothing. It’s never a pretty site.

Back to not so pretty sites, PWInsider is reporting that this may have been a suicide attempt on her part. If so, well, this isn’t an “attempt” it’s a cry for attention. If she wanted to off herself there is one sure fire way of doing so. Shoot yourself in the head. But then, there are the instances where people survive and are horribly deformed afterward. So, did Chyna already try shooting herself? I mean look at that monstrosity. What the fuck happened to her face? It’s like a dog chewed on her lips for a few hours and then pissed bleach in her face? -Jeremy

Frankie Has Surgery Putting Suicide On Hold.

The Character Suicide dumbasses!

The Character Suicide dumbasses!

In what should shock nobody who has Kaz as a friend on MySpace (We do), the Wrestling Observer by way of Prowrestling.net , is reporting that Frankie underwent surgery to repair a torn triceps. Now I would like to call him a TNA Superstar but he clearly quit the company so this falls under the miscellaneous task. He was rumored though to be the “Suicide” character that TNA has been slipping in to their broadcast like the fourth penis a sorority girl feels on rush week.  Why TNA couldn’t just work out an injury angle for Kaz and let him go off for surgery is beyond all of us here at Stunt granny. It really continues the tired storytelling of TNA. Having him come back under a mask is no better and then calling him Suicide, sweet tits on a pig ghost is that dumb. Oh well, he won’t be seen for a while now so who cares. – Jeremy

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