Total Divas – Season 2 – Cabo – She Said (He Edited)

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Having watched two back to back episodes of Total Diva’s, I sit here typing with a terrible headache. Should I attribute it to having to cram in two Total Diva shows in two days? As much as I’d like to say, yes, I’ll have to say, no, and try to pull my thoughts together to get through this review.

We’ve all been to bachelor / bachelorette parties, but in no way have I been to a swanky bachelorette party in Cabo San Lucas, MX. Wow! This episode focused on Brie’s bachelorette party and a bit about Trinity. We’ll start with Trinity first.

At the end of Red and Gold, we saw Trinity get injured in the ring. Cabo starts off with that same segment. Trinity doing her thing in the ring and then getting kneed in the eye. Trinity finishes the match and wins. Trinity heads straight to the back to the doctor who tells her she needs to go to a specialist. We see some gruesome photos of Trinity’s eye and a supportive and sympathetic Jon. Trinity wears an eye patch but after a few days, she goes back into the doctor who tells her that a bone is broken and there is a lot of fat around her eye, but that it should heal in 2-3 weeks. Trinity is obviously excited as she is in the height of her career and wants that Title belt.

Summer Rae approaches Eva Marie about Cabo. Since I can never understand what Summer Rae says as she can’t seem to open her mouth all the way to enunciate words, I’m not sure if she asked Eva if she was going to Cabo or if she was invited and wanted to know if Eva was going. Either way, Eva tells her that she will have all the fun for Summer as Summer has burned way too many bridges. Eva walks away and hilariously enough, Summer asks a random girl standing there if she is going to Cabo then walks away.

It’s Brie-mode time. Getting off the plane, there is a bar for ‘soda’s to go’ which Nattie, Nikki and Brie take advantage of. (Kevin’s Edit: How dare you forget they were called road sodas! Opie would be disappointed.) Driving up to the rental for the bachelorette party, Nattie starts talking about swimming with dolphins, board games and building a sand castle. I’d have to say, that all sounds fun to me, but alas, the girls say ‘NO”, it’s Briemode and get your drink on. The rental is stunning. So open and beautiful, each Diva has their own room. That is pretty swanky, along with a gorgeous pool that overlooks the ocean. Personal servants bring them all the drinks they want which is pretty awesome. You have a scene of scantily placed bikini’s and some ass slapping, which was weird for me to watch, but I’m sure the guys out there were wiping drool from their faces. (Kevin’s Edit: Other guys will need to speak up. I’m not exactly a big fan looks wise of  these Divas.)

Nattie and Nikki are out in the pool alone and talking about John and how Nattie bets her Divaship on John asking her to marry him. Nikki blurts out that she was married before. This obviously throws Nattie and we find out that at age 20 Nikkie married her high school sweetheart in Vegas with Elvis. They were married 3 years and she said she got an annulment. Brie comes out and gets slightly upset because she is the only one who knew about the marriage and now Nattie knows, and we all know Nattie can’t keep a secret. (Kevin’s Edit: Everyone has that friend who can’t keep their yapper shut. Nattie has nothing of interest to tell about herself so she needs to gossip.)

The party continues into the night and we see Eva Marie trying to have a good time, but also looking a bit stressed. We find out that Eva Marie is a recovering Alcoholic and right before she got hired to the WWE she ‘fell off’ the wagon. She tries to hide the fact she isn’t drinking, but it eventually becomes way too much and she ends up leaving the group upset and going home. Ariane tries to stop her but Eva just tells her she doesn’t feel good and is going back to the villa.

The next morning Eva comes clean and tells the girls that she is a recovering alcoholic and she can’t have just 1 drink. The girls support Eva and it becomes an emotional circle of Nattie, Brie, Nikki, Ariane and Eva Marie sharing their emotions and their issues. I actually felt it was quite touching and definitely took away from the Brie-mode. It was a slight buzz kill, but it seemed like the girls didn’t mind. (Kevin’s Edit: I have no idea why she struggled with telling them especially in a setting you’re supposed to get hammered in.) I did have to laugh though when Nikki told Eva that the ones you hate the most are the ones that become your best friends, I don’t think so, but whatever, she’s a Diva.

We end the Brie-mode with swimming with the dolphins. Nattie got what she wanted and was very happy. I actually thought that seemed like a cool idea. (Kevin’s Edit: I would be down for swimming with dolphins. It’d be way more fun to be in a shark cage though.)

At the end of the episode, Nikki decides to tell her family that she was married before. Her father is OK with it. I found it odd he was there as I thought they didn’t like their dad? (Kevin’s Edit: He was there? Shows you how much I was paying attention. They didn’t like him though.) And her mom was a bit surprised after how close they are that Nikki didn’t confide in her. Nikki’s brother went off though. He said he was really pissed and stormed off. I didn’t understand his anger as he isn’t the one who was married and divorced and he also should be supportive and not a child. That entire scene was stupid. Nikki leaves as she feels unwanted in her brother’s home and is now worried what John will say when she tells him. (Kevin’s Edit: Are we sure the brother isn’t gay after that reaction?)

We see in the preview that it’s time for Brie to get married, it’s Wrestlemania, and it concludes with Nikki’s brother telling John that Nikki was married before. Oh boy, part 1 of 2 of the season finale. Maybe I’ll have to write one review for the season finale as I find TV is getting a bit more crazy with making a 2 part season finale, what happened to the cliffhangers from back in the day! (Kevin’s Edit: I promised on big reviews so let’s just do it that way.) – M & (Kevin)

#TotalDivas – Season 2 – Episode – 6 – She Said (He Edited)

flirting-noOh, the joys of Total Diva’s. There is a reason that I continue to take a hiatus from this train wreck and it’s not because I was on vacation, it’s mainly because I just don’t have the time to try and think of something to write every week when this train wreck is watched. I feel like it goes through spurts of good television (as good as a Diva show could be) and spurts of horrific television (where everything is set up so they can actually have a show for people to watch). I obviously missed writing about Ariane house sitting for Natalia and losing her cat during a party. I honestly couldn’t tell you what else happened within that episode, it was so boring. (Kevin’s Edit: She suggested a He Said (She Edited) but I remember about as much of that episode as she does.)

The 5/4 episode is the one I’ll be writing about today. It’s all about Summer Rae,  Trinity and Brie. I’ll start with Trinity as she seemed to have the least amount in the show even though she was focused on.

Trinity and Jon are married. Jon is ready for kids and Trinity is at the height of her career and does not want kids. This is obviously something to discuss before you tie the knot. We find out that Jon has 2 kids already, a boy and girl. They are adorable! Anyway, Trinity always forgets to take her pill and Jon refuses to put on a “love sleeve” as he says he doesn’t have time and it’s too constricting. Trinity decides, well, I keep forgetting and I don’t want kids now, so she and her mom go and have an implant put into her arm. It’s a 3 year birth control implant so she won’t get pregnant. I’m not sure if this is truly the best way to handle this as she doesn’t tell Jon what she does. She says it’s her body and she can do what she wants. As I haven’t read up on this procedure and the pros and cons, if it works for her and she doesn’t get pregnant, good for her. But if she has always been that forgetful and he has never worn a love sleeve and they have been together this long already, I’m not sure why she really did do this. All birth control is not 100%. those love sleeves are important even when a girl is on the pill. So I wish them the best of luck and maybe next time she won’t hide a procedure from her husband. (Kevin’s Edit: She’s being a bone head. He’s being a bone head. If anyone would know about taking a while to get to the top, I’d think it’d be Jon since it’s taken him 5 years to get consistent TV time. Granted, Trinity hasn’t been getting much TV time since she decided to stop Aksana’s knee with her face.  When this was recorded, she was being pushed for the Diva’s Title. I do love that WWE policy, if someone else messes up, you get punished. See Ziggler, Dolph.)

Brie is in the process of planning her wedding. She is so excited and we get to see her try on wedding dresses. The dress she picks is very pretty and elegant and I would expect nothing less from Brie. Nikki, though, decides to arrive fashionably late, after Brie finds her dress. The entire episode is about Nikki being a bitch to Brie as Brie is trying to plan her wedding. Nikki wants nothing to do with anything. She gets upset with Brie at the gym when they are working out because Brie is asking about seating arrangements and bridesmaid dresses. (Kevin’s Edit: I’d be pissed if someone talked to me that much in the gym too. It doesn’t even need to be about wedding stuff. John Cena, like normal, makes the best out of his screen time cracking a joke that I’d love for him to use on TV instead of another poop joke.) Nikki gets pissed with Brie when Brie says ‘no’ to a skanky dress that Nikki wants to wear in her wedding and Nikki refuses to help Brie with wedding invitations as she has had a busy week and just doesn’t have time. (Kevin’s Edit: Nikki was wrong the rest of the time including the slutty (and yummy) dress.)

I agree with Brie, Nikki is being a bitch. It doesn’t matter if the guy you are dating is never going to propose to you. It doesn’t matter if you’re not going to get married, ever. What does matter is it’s the Bride’s day, your twin sister’s day. A marriage that will only happen one time  (Kevin’s Edit: Hahhaha. It only happens once is hilarious.) and you should be ecstatic for your sister and be helping her every step of the way and not making her feel like she shouldn’t be asking for help. I agreed with Brie in that, it is her day and Nikki had no right to act that way. Nikki chose to be in the relationship that she is in and that’s her problem if she is OK with not being married. You don’t rain on other peoples weddings, you suck it up and be the best sister you can be. Even the apology was stupid. (Kevin’s Edit: The stupid apology on both’s behalf is what makes me think it’s a made up plot. No real anger either way but it’s a way to conclude the storyline.)

Our final Diva is Summer Rae. We all know how much I can’t stand her. She is a nasally, skanky hoe. We definitely see that in this episode. Summer Rae enters and we find out that she is single (go figure) and that her boyfriend of 2 years that broke up with her is getting married. She states that all the boyfriends she’s had recently are all married now, or engaged to be married, so they always marry the girl after her. Huh, do you think it’s your attitude that shows through and how desperate you are! Summer Rae tells the girls at lunch and the girls suggest she ask Fandango out as they have good chemistry on the set. (Kevin’s Edit: I have never hooked up with any ladies I worked with. I really should have at Panini’s in Kent.) Brie brings up that that is how her and Daniel met. We see a fabulous 2010 scene where Brie is talking to Daniel and Nikki walks in. (Kevin’s Edit: Fabulous? I had forgotten about that angle. Pretty sure I was annoyed he was teamed with them.) I’m just going to throw this in there, but it’s usually not a good idea to date someone from work as there is a 50/50 chance of it working or imploding.

Summer Rae decides to ask Fandango out. Well, that is great as they are both non attractive people that are extremely vain. They would be perfect for each other. They just happen to live very close to each other in Florida. She dresses skanky and he dresses like a bum and they go to a bar he frequents a lot. (Kevin’s Edit: Always a good way to say you’re trying to get some. Let’s get her drunk!) The whole night she keeps asking him personal questions and he’s like, why do you keep asking me all these questions? Summer Rae just laughs like she is trying too hard and then they proceed to do firebombs. My favorite line is when she says, I can’t decide if he is making fun of me or complimenting me. If you can’t tell, then you are blond! They go back to his place where they are strategically placed in the kitchen and pretending to be into each other. Shots of vodka, they go to the sofa where she proceeds to attack him. Not sure who cuts it off first, but they make it seem like it was her idea and he just sits there stupefied. She says she doesn’t feel the connection and it was like kissing her brother. (Kevin’s Edit: If you weren’t feeling him, why did you jump on top so quick? Storyline alert! The problem is this would work much better as a supplement to Raw/Smackdown but the viewing of this taped show is delayed so they don’t connect well.)

So Summer Rae just leaves. Yes, she just walks out! It was a very awkward moment I thought. They are seen at their next show and Fandango is asking about her about what happened and she just blows him off telling him they don’t have any chemistry and that she doesn’t want anyone to know what happened. Fandango, even though I really don’t like you, you can definitely do soooo much better than Summer Rae.

Will Summer Rae continue to be single? What’s next for Ariane and Vinnie? Will Nikki and Brie act normal toward each other in the next episode like nothing happened. Only E! Entertainment knows and I’ll be finding out next time on the 5/11 episode of Total Diva’s. – M & (Kevin)

#TotalDivas – Season 2 – Episode 4

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The April 20th episode was definitely an episode I didn’t think I’d witness. I actually felt like it was a bit more heartwarming than any other episode that they have filmed, though, it could be because Summer Rae wasn’t in the show at all which totally helps and there wasn’t any drama at all. Granted, there were still some completely ridiculous scenes which involved Nattie and TJ, but other than that, I actually felt for the first time the Diva’s really are normal people with everyday issues, in which you can semi-relate to on a woman’s level, so I’m sure any guy watching the episode was like, this was a stupid chick show since there wasn’t much boobs and skankiness showing up. (Kevin’s Edit: Just imagine me moving my head up and down.)

We’ll begin with Nattie and TJ as it’s the most ridiculous part of the show. So Ariane and Nikki find out that Nattie doesn’t know what Doggie Style is. Nattie get’s pretty flustered at trying to get around it but in the end, Ariane calls her sex therapist to see if she can help for Nattie and TJ. (Kevin’s Edit: I had forgotten about Ariane’s repression since she’s been hard to find this season outside of the Eva Marie pics.) Nattie says she is to busy to go see her, so she comes to their house. Upon questions about their sex life, she asks how they first got together, Nattie doesn’t seem to remember but TJ remembers the moments, really? (Kevin’s Edit: I didn’t remember when I first said “I love you” to the lady. No way he remembers that.) So the sex therapist says they need to ‘sex up’ the house. She tells them different role playing to do in the different areas of the house and awkwardly suggests they leave the front door open to have sex in their entry way. (Kevin’s Edit: I suggested it in more open places.) Nattie of course declines this idea. Nattie does think this could work as Ariane and Vincent do seem to be happier since seeing the therapist. So, as we get to see in the ‘black and white footage’, Nattie has TJ be a burglar and Nattie dresses as a skanky school girl and she has TJ break into the house through an open window. I laughed out loud at this one, good gravy!(Kevin’s Edit: It was killing me she used an old outfit from a WWE shoot.)

Eva Marie hasn’t been feeling well. I feel like this story line pops up when they aren’t sure what to put into the show. Well, this time, Eva Marie’s husband, insert name I forget here (Kevin’s Edit: You think I remember this tool bag’s name?), rushes her to the hospital as she says her stomach is huge and she looks about 6 months pregnant and is peeing blood. I have to say, that is not a good sign. The doctor says she has a cyst that ruptured. I am going to wonder about this as I’ve had numerous cysts and they rupture when you have your period, they don’t normally make you pee blood. The swelling in her stomach is extra fluid, and then on a private call from the doctor (HIPPA restricted) we find out that Eva Marie has an abnormal uterus and may never be able to have kids. Eva freaks out thinking her husband is going to go nuts cause he wants lots of kids. She finally tells him and breaks down. I actually have to give the schmuck credit in this episode for being very understanding. (Kevin’s Edit: I know I called him a tool above but he didn’t make the switch to non-meat head until helping her out as much as he did.) The worst thing a woman can be told is that she won’t be able to have kids, if she wants them. I don’t see Eva Marie as a ‘mom’ but who knows down the line. So Eva’s husband calls her Mom and her mom is really ‘frosty’ on the phone throwing it back in Eva’s face that she deserted her family to be with her husband, but then her mom says they will fly out. So her parents come, this time they don’t hide his stuff, and the parents and her husband find a truce and the dad and schmuck embrace, which is totally camera acted. (Kevin’s Edit: The WWE knows when to end feuds people don’t give a care about.) It’s hard to say what is real and what is fiction in this story line, but I felt most of it was really true. Would I want to share that on TV? No way! But I guess some people don’t mind airing their laundry for a buck.

Trinity and Jon decide it’s time to get married. They have been together for 5 years and engaged for 2. Trinity really wants Jon’s dad to be there, so at Old School Raw, they approach Rikishi after his match and they tell him that they are getting married in Maui in a few days and want him to be there. After a weird silence, he starts to get emotional and blames it on the match and then says he is so happy and will be there. This makes Trinity very happy as she wants the entire family on both sides there. They rent this gorgeous place on the beach where they will stay and have the ceremony. The night before the wedding Jon’s dad is still not there. Trinity starts asking if she’s the reason he’s not coming. Jon is very quiet and then finally tells her ‘no’ it’s because he got another gig and decided to do that instead. (Kevin’s Edit: I’m just throwing this out there because I haven’t heard an official statement from Rikishi but when you don’t attend your son’s wedding because he’s marrying a black woman, it means your a racist. White people aren’t the only ones who can be racist.) Ouch! There was talk of if he wasn’t coming because Trinity is not Samoan, but Jon says that is not the case. Jey is there with them and this is the 1st time I’ve ever heard him talk but he has some very kind and encouraging words for Jon and Trinity which is very sweet. The wedding day comes, no Rikishi, Trinity’s dad cries and Trinity looks gorgeous. Jon and Trinity are both moved by the ceremony (which I don’t think is something you can just fake) and they are now married. As they walked down the aisle as man and wife the chant of I say Uce you say O going on which was silly but fun.(Kevin’s Edit: I couldn’t stop laughing that of all people the Usos could be close to, it was Drew McIntyre who I think started the chant. The guy is even a tool off camera. The Usos need to pick friends that are further up the WWE food chain now that they won the tag titles.)

In the end, the show was pretty good, probably one of the better episodes I’ve seen since this show aired, but I’m sure it definitely won’t last long as I’m sure Summer Rae is getting ready for a come back at some point to add drama and nauseating skankiness to the show. – M & (Kevin)

@TotalDivas – Season 2 – Episode 3

I love to read. I read because I’m able to escape from the everyday routine of life and get absorbed into either a thrilling storyline filled with lots of adventure and intrigue or I get engrossed in a storyline filled with lots of laugh out loud humor and peppy characters. (Kevin’s Edit: Lady, I provide laugh out loud humor every day of the week for you.) When I think of reality TV, I think of, terrible acting, mundane story lines, and just eh TV. This is exactly what Total Diva’s brought this week. Half way through I contemplated turning off the show and just pretending to finish the article with how I thought the show should end, but alas, I watched a completely boring 42 minute episode in which I wish I could have been reading.

This episode was all about Nattie, Nikki and Trinity. I think slutty Summer Rae only had a minute in the show along with Eva Marie.

We’ll start with Trinity this time around. To no shock at all, Trinity has made a pop song and was filming a music video. Not surprised since Cameron already did a song and Trinity’s dad is a musician. The song is complete and it’s now time to film the video, but her outfit isn’t done. She get’s so upset because the rhinestones aren’t on the back of the outfit yet, that she takes her 1 piece rhinestone suit and says she will finish it herself. Well, she called in her Uncles and they managed to pull an all nighter and got it done. (Kevin’s Edit: Trinity mentioned that she had been up for nearly 2 days when filming the video. I stayed up 70 straight hours to finish a project in school then had to wait several hours for a once a week evening class that I was determined to get to. When I went to dinner before the class, I attacked my hoagie with a spork. My then girlfriend sent me home. That was a good plan.) While shooting the video, it ripped. Unsalvageable. Then, to make matters worse, the Police show up because there is confusion with the permit. Now the director is upset and is trying to get this finished! Alas, like every TV show, everything ends happily. Brodus hears the song and says he wants to send it to his contacts, and name drops Snoop Dog. Seriously? (Kevin’s Edit: I must not have informed my lady that Brodus was one of Snoop’s body guards.)

Our next  Diva is Nikki. We find out in this episode that she is now a real estate agent. Huh. I would never have seen that coming. Anyway, she gets the opportunity to show a home with a fabulous ocean view. She calls John and tells him how fabulous the view is and how much she loves the house. It was definitely an awkward showing and the people left. (Kevin’s Blog: I’m not surprised she was terrible. The WWE has never shown faith in their mic skills. Looks hot twins!) John comes to visit and all of a sudden he’s being mysterious and lying about where he is and taking abrupt phone calls and on the computer and quickly closes it when Nikki walks in. She obviously thinks he’s having an affair. All I can think about is, is she really that stupid? Can they make it any more obvious? So Nikki calls him out on his supposed cheating, he doesn’t deny it. She goes to show her house again that she is truly in love with, John shows up and we find out all the sneaking around is him moving funds so he can buy her the house and he will move to California. I’m pretty sick of these 2 already because it’s stupid how she loves a house so much that he just buys is for her. Is he going to buy her EVERYTHING that she says she loves? (Kevin’s Blog: You know you’re still with me because I’m your Sugar Daddy.)

Nattie is our final diva this week. In the previous episode Summer Rae hit her across the face and now Nattie has to have surgery on her nose that will make her be out of work for 6 months for healing time. She tells Summer Rae, who she faced first after finding out the news, to stay away from her face during their match. Summer Rae doesn’t, Nattie gets pissed and kicks Summer Rae’s butt in the ring. (Kevin’s Edit: I’m positive I have told her wrestling is fake.) She decides she isn’t going to give up the TLC match, so she takes the chance of hurting her nose even more. TJ explains that it’s better to take care of yourself and all will be OK, but she doesn’t listen and takes on the match and causes more of a problem for her face. (Kevin’s Edit: Nattie toughed out another Diva’s Title loss.)

I’m not sure if I missed something or not, but as you can tell by the short recap, it was a very dull and uninspiring show. Could the WWE make it more interesting? Yes. Will they? No. Because why would they try to showcase the hard work the Diva’s put in when they can just put them in skimpy outfits, give them terrible scripts to pretend to be real about and create as much drama as possible so more people will tune in. It’s amazing how much they are making off of this disaster. All I can say is, Total Diva’s will never be readable material, and I bet sometime soon, the WWE will come out with some kind of Diva book and they will make another crap load of money off another dull project.

One more episode to go to be caught up. When is this series over? I can only keep my fingers crossed it will be very soon! (Kevin’s Edit: Hoping thi show goes away is akin to me hoping Raw stops being 3 hours. It’s not happening.) – M & (Kevin)

@TotalDivas – She Said (He Edited) – Season 2 – Episodes 1 & 2

From mbpopart.com

From mbpopart.com

Tonight I have witnessed a train wreck. I felt so dirty, I had to take a shower when the show was over. I’m pretty sure I no longer have a working brain due to all the stupidity that arose from the episode. Due to too much on the dvr, we have decided to do She said He edited at different times to get different reactions. When I told my boyfriend all my brain cells died with this episode he laughed and said it would all be OK. (Kevin’s Edit: I laughed because you were being funny. I hope it translates into the article.) He has yet to watch the episode, so after he does he will understand my disbelief that they actually air this crap and that 4 million people actually take the time to watch it. (Kevin’s Edit: I gave her bad math. It was only 1.39 million people that watched it. I’m sure she won’t feel much better about my error.)

I can only write about the current episode that I watched as I am 3 weeks behind. But will quickly recap in each article. JoJo is gone and skanky Summer Rae is now on the show. I’m not sure who is worse. Summer Rae or Eva Marie. It’s like watching a bad porno with that fake blond hair and god awful red dye job. It was made obvious in the 1st few episodes that no one was going to like Summer Rae and she was placed on the show to make more drama for everyone, so I’ll save her for last. (Kevin’s Edit: More drama = more eyes.)

We’ll start with Eva Marie since the season ended with her and she was getting married, maybe, to her loser boyfriend. Well, no surprise here, but she did and did not inform her family. Her family came for a visit and she moved her husband out so there would be no trace of him. Huh, interesting way to start a marriage. Well, the family figured it out, they were pissed, but yet, who is calling the kettle black here since her brothers are living with women and are not married. So that just kinda ended. (Kevin’s Edit: I found her calling out her brothers hilarious. That subject did get dropped awfully quick.) Then photos popped up from back in the day and Eva Marie said those were a mistake and should have never been done. Creepy Fandango made a weird comment to her that made my skin crawl. In this past episode, Eva Marie and Summer Rae have become besties and are traveling separate from everyone on the bus because of the photo incident and because no one likes Summer Rae. She was the one that told Eva Marie about the photos. Even though Eva Marie thinks Summer Rae stepped over the line in episode 2 with Brie, they will still probably continue being besties for at least a while.

Nikki and John Cena got back together on the pier. It wasn’t as cheesy as the very first episode when they tried to reenact a scene from The Notebook, but who walks down a pier in high heeled shoes, a skin tight red dress with boobs popping out and a fur? Oh, Nikki Bella, that’s right. So John said he made mistakes and that he wants to try a lot harder. Nikki forgave him and all is well with the world. So far. Nikki did lose a tooth in an episode and she thought she looked hideous so refused to ride in the bus with John and tried to avoid him. Not the best decision when your relationship is on the line. In this past episode Nikki tried to be the support for Brie as Summer Rae made a play for Daniel Bryan, Brie’s then fiance. (Kevin’s Edit: She just asked him a really weird question about getting his approval. She didn’t seem to be coming on to Bryan to me. I do want to know who she slept with.)

Speaking of Brie, she thought it would be a great idea to rent a bus, like Nikki and John have and have everyone ride with them to split the cost. Bryan was not enthused with this idea as he is an environmentalist and those busses take up a LOT of gas and energy. But Brie got her wish and TJ/Nattie, Jon Uso/Trinity, Summer Rae, Eva Marie and Ariane all rode on the bus with Brie and Bryan. (Kevin’s Edit: She got her wish because those other people were brought onto the bus to make it more “Green”.) Bryan made a few ‘house’ rules, no sex on the bus and no pooping on the bus. Well, both of these rules were broken as Nattie pooped on the bus and John Uso/Trinity almost got it on on the bus, it was broken up by Brie. Brie, the most sensible I think out of the group, ends up blowing her top this time around when Bryan tells her that Summer Rae sought him out and told him that she cares what he thinks, then made a flirtatious movement touching him. Because Nikki told her what Summer Rae did with John and some of the other male wrestlers, (hearsay of inappropriate comments), Brie went nuts and hunted down Summer Rae. Brie pretty much told her to never pull someone’s man aside alone and told her to stay away from Bryan. Summer Rae accused Brie of being insecure in her relationship, which caused Brie to go nuts and told Summer Rae pretty much that she is a skanky ho. Touche! All the while Bryan, Eva Marie and Nikki listening. Eva Marie agreed that Summer Rae crossed a line. Bryan told Brie that she is very protective of her man. (Kevin’s Edit: It’s pretty bad when Eva Marie is the voice of reason.)

You don’t have much going on with Ariane in the past few episodes. She was the one that found the photos of Eva Marie and showed them to everyone. She did try to apologize but Eva Marie has yet to accept her apology. I do think Ariane has a point, Eva Marie is very good at making it all about her and how fabulous she is getting the covers on magazine and getting a Mattel doll so early in her career. Ariane’s beef is that she got a cover too but no one seems to care. (Kevin’s Edit: Eva Marie does seem like a spot light hog but Ariane is the other drama queen who got trumped by Summer Rae. I’m surprised every guy hasn’t looked for skanky photos of (insert new Diva here) because there’s a 90% chance they exist.)

We find out that John Uso has a huge sex drive in this episode and can’t seem to keep it in his pants for 4 days while traveling on the bus. Trinity is OK with adhering to the rules, so she obviously feels bad when the get caught in the act by Brie on the bus.

Nattie has serious issues with Summer Rae. Whether it’s because they are both blonds, I’m not sure, but Nattie seems to despise her. In this episode, Nattie does try to take the high road and tell Summer Rae that she needs to be more respectful to the Diva’s and that she is making a display of all her skankiness. When the new Mattel dolls are out Nattie is thrilled and Summer Rae walks up and tells her that they did a good job at photoshopping her and that she used to look pretty and thin. This obviously upset Nattie who told Summer she needs to cool it. (Kevin’s Edit: Summer Rae is an excellent shit stirrer. I have no idea if all of these actions have led to her not being on TV now.) I think the best part of this past episode is when Nattie goes into the bathroom on the bus and starts screaming. First TJ goes in to the smallest bathroom in the world and comes out, then she calls for Brie. Come to find out, Nattie was putting Icy Hot on her ‘back’ when she got some Icy Hot in her butt and in hoo haa when she went to the bathroom. Where exactly she was putting the icy hot is still in question as she first said back then changed it to inner thigh. Hmmm. Either way, this is when we find out she pooped on the bus and got Icy Hot in her butt. Ha ha ha. (Kevin’s Edit: I would imagine that Icy Hot burns similar to when I pooped out Scorpion Peppers.)

I leave the most skanky and the newbie for the end. Summer Rae. Man is she ugly. I thought Eva Marie was unattractive, but I think she has competition with Summer Rae. Summer Rae is a hateful woman who thinks she is better than everyone else. Being Fandango’s dance partner, yet being from NXT, she is now considered a Diva. Well, I see why Layla is now Fandango’s partner as in this past episode Fandango told Summer Rae, he didn’t need drama for his career, and this is exactly what she is doing, stirring drama. (Kevin’s Edit: I obviously don’t read ahead while making these comments. Summer Rae is a butter face but those legs make up for it.)

Summer Rae is the one that told Eva Marie that Ariane had the photos of her. Summer Rae is telling everyone that if Nattie spent more time on her wrestling and less time talking gossip then she may have won the Diva’s championship more than once in her Diva career. (Kevin’s Edit: I agree with Summer that Nattie is her own worst enemy. Just keep mentioning that you’re a Hart and eventually they’ll give me a long title reign, right? Maybe Nattie should work on the promo skills.) Summer Rae believes that she is gorgeous and is upset with her wardrobe and wants to be even sluttier than what she wears with Fandango and Summer Rae made a play at Bryan. (Kevin’s Edit: Have you ever seen a dance competition? All the ladies are dressed slutty.)

So at the end of this train wreck of an episode, Summer Rae hunts down Nattie’s house, goes to the door uninvited and proceeds to tell Nattie that she needs to spend less time gossiping and more time focused on her career. She pretty much tells Nattie that she is an old, fat, unattractive Diva that isn’t worth anyone’s time. Nattie tells Summer Rae she is a ho. Summer Rae slaps her across the face. Nattie pushes her off her property and tells her to NEVER step foot on her property again.

After watching this episode, I needed a sedative. This episode was filled with so much cattiness and egos that I was just dumbfounded that I watched 42 minutes of stupidity. I honestly think that there were more brain cells saved watching Jersey Shore than watching Total Divas, at least this time around. I explained to my boyfriend that it was a cruel punishment for me to watch this show as I could have spent the 42 minutes doing something productive, but he informed me that he was sure I didn’t lose the brain cells that I thought I did and since I was still mobile and mumbling about a train wreck that I would be fine. (Kevin’s Edit: I lose brain cells when I’m researching for my Sippy Time Beer articles, not this show.)

Here’s to 1 Diva Show and article down and 2 more to go to get back on track. I’ve seen the previews for the next episode and no shocker, another train wreck is on the way. Will the WWE one day actually have good writing for the Diva show or will it always be this horrible, guess I’ll just have to tune in and lose a few more brain cells to see.– M (& Kevin)

Stunt Granny Audio #246

Jerry Threatening Tom

Jeremy & Kevin are back for a second straight day with their witticisms. They start by talking about their childhood and playing “Smear The Queer”. Does making the name rhyme make it better? Which bully thought up this game so that he could pick on the people they wanted to? What happened to Kevin’s younger brother while playing said game? The guys move along to an injury in the WWE, that of Naomi. How soon will Aksana get back on TV? Did the WWE take down Naomi’s picture of her injured eye? Wouldn’t that picture work as a perfect example of “Don’t do this at home” for the children that watch? Would Naomi be better off going with her real name of Trinity? Will we find out why the Bellas have been off TV in the next season of Total Divas? Jeremy & Kevin move onto Brodus Clay because of his connection to Naomi. Did Jeremy notice that he wasn’t in the Royal Rumble? Has he gotten the number of chances that Alberto Del Rio has had to shine? Speaking of Del Rio, who is going to miss him if he doesn’t renew his contract? Did he get a push because he is an older man? Does age factor into backstage politics? Who else on the roster has an age that surprised Jeremy & Kevin? Will there ever be a WWE Superstar who makes an impact at a young age like Bryce Harper has done in Major League Baseball? Does Brock Lesnar count? Maybe Randy Orton? Who will benefit most from Del Rio leaving if he does leave after this contract expires? Find out the answers to these questions and more when you click on the link below.

@TotalDivas – She Said (He Edited) – Episode 13

It's never too late to post something on Stunt Granny.

It’s never too late to post something on Stunt Granny.

My apologies for not staying on track with the weekly Diva column. This write up is from the December 8 episode, which we quickly watched last night. Thankfully, I am only 1 episode behind and was told last night, the Diva’s are off till March, WOOP! So, I’ll have time to recoup some brain cells before the Diva’s return. Yea! (Kevin’s Edit: She’ll kill those recouped brain cells with cider beers.)

This weeks episode had some awkward moments in it. One that sticks out the most is  the one with Nattie and Eva Marie. Eva Marie told Nattie what a great outfit she had on (jeans and a t-shirt, really?) and Nattie said she was doing a photo shoot and then the scene just kind of ended, so either someone did a bad edit job, or the scene was a filler to get Eva Marie into more than just 2 scenes. I have to say, maybe next time just cut the scene, it wasn’t worth the minute. (Kevin’s Edit: This scene is an example of how boring Jojo is. They couldn’t make up a scene for her to be more than a wall flower.)

Nattie’s cat Gizmo passed away in this week’s episode and you see how Nattie and TJ react, awkward moment number 2. Are these two really married in real life because they don’t talk like two people in love at all. (Kevin’s Edit: You’re stealing my material lady.) They both seem so standoffish it’s uncomfortable to watch. Gizmo had a stroke and Nattie and TJ had to put Gizmo to sleep. I think the highlight of this episode is how Nattie is so upset about Gizmo dying but when she meets the girls for lunch she says ‘ So I’ll just be brief, Gizmo’s dead’…really? I’d hate to see her reaction if TJ bit the dust. ‘ So, I’ll just brief, TJ’s dead, I’ll have a salad with the dressing on the side please’. Ha ha. (Kevin’s Edit: I was doubled over in laughter reading those lines. Glad she cracked herself up too. It was really weird how blunt Nattie was.) Even Nattie’s support that TJ got back into wrestling she was like, ‘good job’. I was just like, she showed more emotion putting Gizmo to sleep than her husband getting back in the ring after a serious knee injury. (Kevin’s Edit: I couldn’t sum up all of their awkwardness better.)

Brie and Nicole had their issues in this episode. Brie believes Nicole is more into playing house with John Cena than getting back into The Bella Twins. Brie has been solo for 5 months since Nicole has been healing and getting lots of recognition to a point where the producers approached Nicole about Brie going solo since she is still healing; and having Brie due the singles match for the Diva title and not allowing Eva Marie or Nicole to go out there, was a hit to Nicole. But in the end, after all the bickering, the sisters made up. (Kevin’s Edit: I thought it was cool to see Brie & Daniel Bryan working out together. I always pay attention to see if there’s something in them that I could add into my work out. Nothing new to what they were doing. Bryan saying that Cena would laugh at the weights he used was funny and self deprecating.)

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