Stunt Granny Sports Show #9

Um, yes please.

Um, yes please.

OK look you know we are going to talk about Sergio Garcia and his suggestions for Tiger Woods. What’s the big deal? It is golf isn’t it racist anyway? How could things get ay worse right? Well you let the CEO of the European Tour open his stupid mouth right? This ay be the only golf break that ever occurs on Stunt Granny in any capacity so it may as well be on the latest edition of The Stunt Granny Sports Show. Yes, Eric2 and Jeremy are back and among mocking golf and its competitors they also cover some serious topics like sexual assault and how women give up on looking good once they are married. Yup that’s right . Pete Rose gets married and his wife immediately decides to change her appearance for the worse. How is that fair for old Charlie Hustle? Hasn’t he given and then suffered enough already? Shouldn’t he be treated like a king? How stupid is Jose Canseco? Is it stupidity or a greater problem of being aloof and arrogant? What person wouldn’t be terrified and hiding in the face of sexual assault allegations? Why would any rational person go against his attorneys orders and blather on o the media? What kind of dummy taunts the accuser on Twitter? What exactly is Ozzie Canseco up to right now anyway? Is this a Lifetime movie in the works? They also break down how the media victimize itself in the face of athletes hiding things and hurting them. It really is quite funny how this always happens. There is some NHL playoff talk that somehow melds in to NBA playoff talk and then back to NHL talk and a nice dose of Henry The Hockey Hound being fed up taking matters in to his own hands when it comes to bacon. Oh yeah and Miguel Cabrera. So get to downloading the show and enjoy the randomness. It is funny, at least it should be. Really not sure since no one has listened to it again. In the moment it came across as funny. We could be wrong so download it already. OK?

#ROH Is The Worst Part VII

arnold-schwarzenegger-intense

From upfitness.com

It absolutely drives me batty that Ring of Honor feels the need to push Roderick Strong as being in fantastic shape. When I punched fantastic shape into Google, that image above was the first one. Arnold may have been doing some stuff to his body to enhance it, but he was clearly doing some work to look that way. Over the course of the past year plus of watching ROH, Strong has been consistently defended by whatever announcer happened to behind the desk. Kevin Kelly leads the charge. In this episode, Nigel McGuinness touted his strength and endurance. I’ve changed to doing core and endurance training over the past five years. I have had a much easier time losing my stomach because of it. Which brings us back to Strong. Is he fat? Not even close but the guy has a bit of a gut. If he is in such fantastic shape, why does he have no muscle tone and a baby gut? It’s all to cover up for the fact that Roderick is clearly done being in shape. I Googled pictures of him and he had plenty of muscle tone in the past.

Roderick Strong is in an organization that reveres him or at least it seems that way with all of the announcers slobbering all over him. But they don’t see him suited to do anything. He’s not had his teeth sunk into a good story line in the same period of me watching. Sure, him and Michael Elgin temporarily feuded when the House of Truth broke up but they didn’t put much gusto behind it. I’d make an argument that Truth Martini’s break down got about as much attention. Which leads me to say, maybe I don’t blame Roderick for mailing it in and keeping his mediocre slot. ROH is the worst for turning their own celebrated wrestler into his own personal Ground Hog’s Day. -Kevin

Edit: After talking to my Prime Wrestling partner in crime Dan Kuester on ye olde Twitter, I realized I had forgotten an aspect of this hyping. Dan said “They aren’t going to say “Strong is kinda plain looking!” I don’t expect an announcer to undersell any of their wrestlers. The announcers do it so much though, I feel like they’re compensating for Strong’s lack of physique. If you mentioned it during one of his matches, fine. But they mention it multiple times in matches, this week included. Kevin Kelly & Nigel made comments before the commercial break then Nigel revisited the topic after the break. It’s too much. Knock it off or make Strong actually train. -Kevin

Hulk Hogan + Brooke Hogan = Perv Twitter Responses

BrookesLegs

According to Prowrestling.net, Hulk Hogan got in trouble by the Twitter-verse for sending out this picture of his daughter that was labeled “Brooke’s legs”. For some reason, the Hulkster didn’t think this image would invoke the picture of him rubbing oil on his daughter’s ass or responses of him being a pervert on Twitter. The Hulkster has taken a break from Twitter after two days of being beaten up about it. For a change, I agree with Hulk that this isn’t creepy. Is it stupid? You better believe it. Brooke has great legs. It’s just too bad she has a man’s chin and face. Aside from that minor problem, she’s all woman.

As an added bonus, I found this picture of a t shirt for his new restaurant, Hogan’s Beach.

HogansBeach

It’s a fun t shirt that has more thought in it than any shirt currently on WWEShop or ShopTNA currently. I can’t delve into the meaning of this shirt because it’s standard design work. Glory Day Hulk Hogan? Check. Riding a shark because he’s so bad ass? Check. Beach? Whoops. I guess it’ll be at the end of the water they’re showing. I hope the shark doesn’t beach itself or Hogan might have PETA to answer to on Twitter instead of a bunch of creepy Twitter trolls. -Kevin

Headlines: Kurt Angle tears groin, Evolve/DGUSA make huge (read: small) announcement

According to Prowrestling.net, Kurt Angle tore his groin during his match at TNA Final Resolution this past Sunday. Important things to note here:

  • Angle turned 44 on Saturday. That doesn’t make him old, but that doesn’t make him young.
  • Angle continues to bang himself up – knees, hamstrings, groins – to the tune of a lot of money and to the delight of, what, 1,400 fans worldwide?
  • When we make fun of wrestlers being fragile, we compare them to Kevin Nash, because his injuries all seemed to happen in WWE. We ignore Kurt Angle, because he’s basically wrestling in Dixie Carter’s back yard, so it doesn’t count.

Angle tweeted that he’d wrestle through the injury because he is a “cyborg.” According to Wikipedia, one characteristic of a cyborg is that “Cyborgs in fiction often play up a human contempt for over-dependence on technology.” We all know Angle very much entrenched in his own fictional world (or, as I like to call it, full of shit), so this is in direct conflict with his over-dependence on the technology of Twitter. Time to close the account!

Also according to Prowrestling.net, Evolve announced Saturday at its iPPV, “18” ( :-S ) that it had a huge announcement: John Morrison and the Young Bucks are headed back to Evolve/DGUSA in 2013! Holy cotton balls! The money I didn’t spend on Evolve 18 almost cowered in my wallet out of fear that I might yank it out and plop it down on a PPV featuring three guys at a total combined weight of 412 pounds and a total combined skill level of Paul Roma.

No one outside Twitter or “Z True Long Island Story” has seen hide nor hair of John Morrison in six months (CWF SuperClash does not count), and the last notable thing the Young Bucks did was piss off Booker T, the nicest guy in wrestling. Here’s hoping the Internet doesn’t erupt when all 1,399 people order that show! -Eric

Kevin’s Blog: What #SippyTimeBeer I Had This Weekend

OFallonChocCherry

We’re trying to branch out here at Stunt Granny so I figured it would be fun to add any of the funky Sippy Time Beers. I bought myself and my girl a Pick a Six down at Kenny Road Market. She wanted some Strongbow because she thought the Harpoon Cider we bought last week was too tart. As soon as I got into the store, I noticed the six pack holder for O’Fallon Cherry Chocolate Beer. No matter how ridiculous or untasty a beer may sound, I’m always interested in trying it. The interest did not disappoint. The taste was more chocolate than cherry. The cherry was more of an after taste much like when I get hints of chocolate from a stout like the Rogue Ale‘s Chocolate Stout. The weird part definitely came in because the after taste also has the wheat of the beer. I love beer. I love chocolate. I don’t lover beer with this much chocolate. It was worth trying but it’s not worth recommending, much like wrestling. If you want to catch the beers I drink, follow me on Twitter and Instagram @difrango11. If you don’t catch me there, it’ll be on here sooner rather than later. -Kevin

Stunt Granny Audio #207

Jeremy and Kevin bring goodness to your ear drums for the second consecutive week. With their broadening on topics by talking about the presidential election. Does Kevin flaunt his status as someone who gets a vote that “counts” since he’s in a swing state? Who would Jeremy have voted for if his vote “counted”? They tie in talk of heaven since Jeremy is awaiting utopia with the passing of the election. How many rules are there in heaven? Does it have a VIP Lounge? How about flaming swords? Jeremy & Kevin tie in the WWE by talking about Linda McMahon’s failed Senate campaign. How bad was Vince McMahon that he had to shell out that much money? How could they recoup the money? Our intrepid duo knows, make a better product on TV! Kevin’s tries to weave the story lines together for Jeremy who has failed to watch Raw yet. Is this good for TV but bad for their quality? How can it work out for the best? Does Jeremy think they’re hot shooting Ryback into another main event? Are they going to ignore the Mick Foley dynamic now that CM Punk is in the match? And what of Dolph Ziggler’s story line coming about with John Cena, who won’t be in the elimination style match. Jeremy already filled out his Mad Lib, how did it end up working out? They wrap up the show by talking about The Walking Dead. Is there a tell when someone is going to die on this show? Find out that and more when you click on the link below!

Stunt Granny Audio Show #207

Samoa Joe poses an interesting question on Twitter

Samoa Joe wants to know:

I know my many, many answers: Authority figures with real authority… equal weight on the importance of both talking and wrestling, but not equal time, thus the complete abolishment of the 20-minute soliloquy… along those lines, the return of the in-ring/podium/backstage interview that always includes an emcee/announcer/talk-show host… a 7-year statute on “takeover” angles…

What about you? Leave a comment below!

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