Angelina Love is out of TNA/Impact Wrestling.

According to her Twitter account, Angelina Love is no longer part of TNA or Impact Wrestling. She hasn’t been seen in months after the terribly long, boring and nonsensical storyline of her becoming Winter’s zombie but not totally a zombie.

To all my wonderful fans, just want to let you know I have been granted my release from TNA. It was completely amicable parting of ways and I want to thank TNA and all of its employees for the wonderful journey I’ve had there over the years. Now I’m on to the next amazing chapter of my life! If you are looking to book me please contact John at john@spectacularsignings.com Thank you so much!

This isn’t a terrible loss as it was the first time she was released by TNA due to visa issues. Love was at one point one of their most important stars. Along with Velvet Sky they formed one of TNA’s only in house star making groups. They then proceeded to tear it down and build it up and then tear it down again for no real reason. No one has come out better for it and it dried up a revenue stream for TNA. So congrats to that Dixie.

Anyway, you have to figure she is dropping the porn name and will return to Angel Williams for her independent bookings. Wait, Angel Sky isn’t that bad of a name really but this isn’t Hentai so never mind. -Jeremy

Jeremy Borash Designs His Bedroom

Since I’m the art director here at Stunt Granny, I took special interest in the above picture that was tweeted by Jeremy Borash (@JeremyBorash). As usual, thanks to the nearly omnipotent Prowrestling.net. Borash tweeted:

A new set built at TNA HQ… for what? Tune into the IMPACT post show tomorrow for the details!

I feel privileged to type about twelve year old boys again this week because this set looks like a bedroom one might live in. You’ve got the sexy posters of the Knockouts because you need some spank bank material that the governor on your parents computer won’t let you get to. You’ve got Velvet Sky almost showing her top for a money shot and you can dream about giving Miss Tessmacher a Dirty Pirate. The boy also wants to put up posters of his male heroes like Sting, Hulk Hogan and of course Mr. Counter Culture Jeff Hardy. I’m pretty sure that the boy’s mom bought that desk and microphone at Ikea. At least Borash now has his dream bedroom inside of Universal Studios or somewhere in the heart of Nashville, TN but really does it matter? Congrats on getting past that 5′-0″ mark on the door frame in mom’s kitchen, tyke! -Kevin

TNA moves Impact Wrestling up an hour, now Devon’s kids can go to bed on time

Yep, the best part of the program that draws the highest ratings that they won't even be able to air in the new hour with all of the fans. (Credit to whoever posted this on Flickr)

According to Prowrestling.net, TNA has announced that Impact Wrestling will move from its current 9-11 p.m. Eastern time slot on Spike TV to an earlier 8-10 p.m. Eastern block, “predicated on the fact that there are more available viewers” during that earlier two hours. Yes, because at 10 p.m. Eastern, millions of people suddenly die and aren’t replaced until 11 p.m., and their TVs explode right there in the living rooms. No, there aren’t more available viewers at that time, and it’s not just TV industry jargon I don’t understand; it’s a fool’s explanation for a pussy move by a pussy company. Remember when TNA attempted the Monday Night Wars V2 in 2010, and within five months were back to Thursdays? The rationale, from TNA’s press release?

The fans have spoken and with their input we have determined the best timeslot to maximize the TNA audience is on Thursday nights where we are confident it will be among the most-watched shows with young men.

So at the time there were enough viewers to force an entire day shift, but now there are too few viewers there which warrants a time shift. I love it. TNA fans, set your VCRs accordingly!

For the record, here are shows TNA will now compete against in that 8-9 p.m. hour:

  • “Missing” (ABC, with puffy Ashley Judd)
  • “The Big Bang Theory” (CBS, as well as every other channel that has syndicated shows, so you can watch it any time)
  • “American Idol” (Fox; you don’t want to miss Steven Tyler’s face melting off)
  • “Community” and “30 Rock” (NBC, two of the most overrated shows of the past five years)
  • Basic cable reruns of “George Lopez,” “Two and a Half Men,” “American Pickers,” and “Real Housewives of New Jersey”
  • Highbrow, out-of-demographic news programs including “The O’Reilly Factor” and “Anderson Cooper 360” (or 180, if you ask Gorilla Monsoon)

If TNA can’t pull itself back up over the 1.0 mark against this cadre of pure shit, it needs to buy a huge novelty “OUT OF BUSINESS” sign and put itself out of its misery. -Eric

Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of #iMPACTWrestling

Jeff Hardy's shirt reminds me of Impressionist paintings. This one is Sunrise by Monet, who is a favorite of mine.

James Storm is distraught over not winning the TNA Title. I’m not the biggest fan of this happening. They do make things work. I thought Bobby Roode would have been dropping the title too soon, which I don’t think I’d said in my previous reviews. I still think Storm should have won but they gave him a nice out by having him practically won. Roode comes out to gloat. I’m digging the new hair cut. It fits a suit better. Roode says he has no opponents left which brings out Mr. Anderson. Roode tells him to get to the back of the pack. Jeff Hardy hobbles out. He thinks he deserves a title shot. Him & Anderson argue. Hulk Hogan wants all the champs out in the ring later. Hardy will fight Anderson.

Crimson & Bully Ray team against Matt Morgan & Austin Aries. Morgan starts against Crimson. They continue to do the heavy work but Crimson was on offense most of the time. Aries gets the tag and brings the fun to the match. Bully Ray pulls the trunks to win. Garrett Bischoff is sauntering in the back.

Hardy thinks it’s his turn to get the title. Jeff thinks it was a good call by Hogan for the match. Garrett comes out. The crowd is excited for the guys around him but go silent when he starts talking. He thanks AJ Styles, RVD & Anderson along with Aries in the back. Ric Flair interrupts the blow jobs. Flair tells Garrett the truth when he rips his mic work. This story continues. Please kill me. They bleep the Bischoff for Eric. Woof. If you’re going to rip someone else’s mic work, bring something other than your worst. Christopher Daniels was holding evidence about AJ Styles. Double Ugh.

Magnus & Samoa Joe talk to Devon about the champs meeting. Short & pointless. Kurt Angle is taking on AJ Styles. My cable cut out of the match but went to commercial. I didn’t miss much. Styles is in control after the break. Daniels gives AJ whatever is in the mystery envelope. AJ screams “How’d you get this?” Angle rolls up AJ for the win. If it was AJ this whole time, why did you wait to reveal it? Stop continuing story lines that suck. Joseph Park tries to talk to Gunner. Park wants answers. Gunner tells him to ask Bully Ray because they wrestled together last.

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Kevin’s Blog: A Day Late & A Dollar Short Review of #iMPACTWrestling

Read below if you want the fun stuff from this week. I’ll keep the depressing stuff off of my introductions. Who wants to hear that? We’ve all got enough of that. Let’s roll.

I’ve finally set my DVR to record an extra five minutes during this show. Hulk Hogan gets the first intro from Dixie Carter because he didn’t get enough air time last week. He books a match between Crimson & Matt Morgan for Lockdown. Hogan sets up a women’s championship challenge who will take on Gail Kim. Hogan trades insults with Ric Flair who doesn’t have a mic. Bobby Roode shows up late with his scruffy looking security team. Roode tries to tell Hogan off but he puts the brakes on it. Roode has to wrestle Mr. Anderson. Hogan then books Jeff Hardy vs Kurt Angle next. Hogan proved me wrong. He got down to business with that segment.

I’m digging Angle’s new tights, more specifically the “Angle” on the leg portion that looks and is colored like the Olympic rings. Jeff Hardy started on offense. Kurt Angle got control before the commercial break. Good place for the match to be in. Hardy takes back over after the break. Triple suplexes by Angle. I’ve always dug the top rope belly to belly over head suplex from Angle. It should really end a match sometime. Hardy started a low blow. Good for him. Who doesn’t know that’s coming from a heel who just held a ref as a shield? Angle leaves. They stopped at a good time. Angle & Hardy could have a better match. Hogan is backstage and informs Angle he has a cage match at Lockdown with Jeff. Ric Flair talks to Eric Bischoff. That’s how informative it was. Bully Ray changes his name to Calfzilla. He says he’s the next world champion. Bully Ray is going to take out Austin Aries.

Bully Ray has eaten some large chicken wings. Austin Aries comes out. Aries shushs him then assaults him with a mic. Aries ends up power bombed after punching Ray in the head. Joseph Park is looking for Abyss still.

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Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of #iMPACTWrestling

How is this not part of the Pie Shops collection?

In less than twenty four hours, one Jeremy Maes and his lady friend will be in Columbus to kick off a weekend of shenanigans for Wrestlemania. It’s not quite being there but we’re hoping to do more on the site. The Hall of Fame being on Monday isn’t going to help in the content department. In the mean time, I’ll bring you some coverage that isn’t the WWE. Let’s roll.

It appears as if I missed nothing last week in regards to Hulk Hogan. Dixie Carter said he has until the main event (I’m guessing) to make his choice. Bobby Roode comes down to the ring with his legal adviser and security. Why are they not called lawyers in wrestling? As I ask, Roode calls him a lawyer. The security is to help James Storm, who naturally comes out after Roode tells him not to. Glad Storm called them mall cops. Storm gets ambushed by Bully Ray. Nothing much happens except Roode fleeing. Storm challenges them both to a match. What is it with the TNA stars going two on one? AJ Styles just made the same dumb mistake. Madison Rayne sits down with Gail Kim. Gail got her a tiara to make up for their rough month. They seem to make up. Cool deal. They’re better as a team.

Christy Hemme is introducing people from the crowd for some reason. The boy beside her hasn’t hit puberty because he isn’t staring at her fabulous tits. Madison is taking on Velvet Sky. For some reason, the Hulk & Dixie segment is next. Velvet is expanding her offense but she still doesn’t seem smooth. Velvet stole HHH’s finisher! Ha. Whatever. It was a modified Pedigree. Makes sense to go face versus heel. Hemme interviews Velvet. She never got her rematch. For some reason, the camera man focuses on Velvet’s stomach as she makes the belt gesture. Woof.

Bully Ray uses BFF for the second time in a couple of minutes. He gives a unification speech. Dixie & Hulk met on a park bench with a camera man acting like a peeping Tom. They said the cameras were there so why would they act like that? I want to punch the camera man. Or the director. Dixie wants Hogan to fix his mistakes. Why is he her only option? Lots of people can run companies. Bring in Shane McMahon. He’s not on WWE TV. I feel like they should have aired this before Dixie said the same thing at the top of the show. We get Crimson and Matt Morgan review. They’re up next.

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#iMPACTWrestling – For The Hell of It

I know I’m way late on this review but whatever. Ha, forgot they had a pay per view. I haven’t checked for results either for this show or for the pay per view. I suppose I can rate their PPV pimping. They’re starting off with Bobby Roode vs Sting build up. Victory Road is the name of the PPV. James Storm thinks there’s not enough givers. He talks about Lockdown. Ugh, just like ROH, they’re doing their best to mix up the pay per views. Bully Ray tells Storm he’s fired up. Bully Ray reminds him of the correct PPV to promote. Storm isn’t going to make it to Victory Road because of Bully Ray. Gunner gets called out to take on Storm. Orlando knows something because they’re chanting “Gunner sucks”. Madison Rayne & Gail Kim are yelling at each other. They try to talk to Sting. Gail is going to take on Mickie James. Madison takes on Velvet Sky.

Roode is going to embarrass Sting at Victory Road. I’m power watching. No ring entrances. Velvet attacks Madison who tried to get an early jump on her. Madison wins with a pull of the tights. That makes no sense. She doesn’t look strong going into the PPV. Crimson & Matt Morgan are sort of arguing. Crimson is playing up his undefeated streak again. Morgan is mad but won’t say anything.

Crimson is taking on Samoa Joe. Their partners are at ring side. Last time this match happened, Joe got bitched. I’d imagine he’ll get more offense in this match. Joe is definitely doing it. Joe gets distracted by Morgan. Crimson spears Joe and gets the win. That type of a win for Joe & Magnus would have helped when they got their first crack at Crimson & Morgan.

Austin Aries gives us X Division champ stats so that he can inform us that he’s the longest reigning champ. Aries plays a high light reel of himself. I like his character but this isn’t doing much for me. He thanks his opponents for being good but not great. That’s better. Zema Ion spoils the party. I dig his look. Now if Ion would just get the tassles off his wrestling pants. Ion threatens to injure Aries. Ion tosses champagne in Aries face. Aries dumps the rest of the bottle on him. Solid build up.

Joseph Park says hi to Gunner. Parks can’t ask a question before Gunner bails for his match. We get replay of Eric Young & ODB getting engaged. They start planning the wedding. They need to contact Eric Nelson for planning tips. They’re getting married in the ring. I hope Nelson does too. Kurt Angle is worried about Garrett Bischoff. He loves swearing. They’re having a five minute match. Angle is going to match Victory Road Jeff Hardy’s last match. I seriously doubt it.

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Kevin’s Blog: Almost Live, Definitely Half Assed Review of #iMPACTWrestling

I'm at the middle of the show and completely confused by everything happening and not in a good way either.

I’ve got nothing for an opening today. I’m tired but ready to bang out this review. Let’s roll.

Jeremy had a great line about Sting. Bobby Roode made him so mad, he was going to start going around everywhere in black face. So wish I had thought of that one. Evidently Kurt Angle is going to tell us multiple reasons why he attacked Jeff Hardy. My guess is that Jeff stopped supplying him with vitamins, cough cough. Kurt brings out cue cards. At least he’s not hiding his note cribbing like the Rock. Unlike the Rock, Angle is in no way electrifying. Just like the Rock, his promo sucks. He calls out Hardy. Jeff slaps him then double legs him. TNA loves officials from the back. Bobby Roode is still the “IT Factor of professional wrestling”. Ask the Miz how much that matters. Austin Aries wonders in. He says indirectly he tweeted something but not what he wrote. Excellent way to craft a promo. If you’re a moron. They talk a walk together because we can’t get enough of fighting authority figures in wrestling today. (That’s a huge dose of sarcasm.)

Daniels & Kazarian come out for the gauntlet match against AJ Styles. Ah, if AJ wins he gets to know why Kazarian turned on him. Why didn’t Daniels order Kazarian to be the first in the match? Kazarian can just lay down now. He still doesn’t like being controlled. They went to commercial break early. Kaz gives AJ his finisher to DQ Daniels but then pins AJ. Daniels looks confused. In a way, I don’t blame him but the main point is not giving out the info. Madison Rayne tries to impress Gail Kim with a bunch of pictures. Gail got them a day at the spa and a match against ODB.

Kim comes out with Madison for the match. Not a fan of the heel vs heel. ODB brings Eric Young to the ring with her. Madison Rayne stopped a bronco buster with a boot to the cooch. EY distracts the ref while his woman is winning. ODB gets the win when Kim can’t interfere? They argue again. Bully Ray berates the make up lady. Roode & Aries make the pitch to get rid of Sting to him. Velvet can barely complain about being screwed before Angelina & Sarita attack her.

They come back from commercial and Velvet Sky is complaining again. She was screwed by Madison. The screwing stops now. Then they replay what they did before the break. Excellent work morons. Weakest assault ever. Mickie James makes the save in the strangest outfit ever. She’s gone 80’s neon. Ric Flair yells at Garrett Bischoff. They want Garrett to come to his sense still. For some reason, Flair, Gunner & E Bisch think they can continue to beat down Garrett. Ground Hog Day something fierce.

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TNA Audio #7 – Defecate In My Mouth

Pictured above: Kurt Angle

Dusty and Matt are back once again to discuss the February 23 edition of Impact Wrestling. Overall, they are very impressed with TNA’s long-term planning of storylines and matches, but are frustrated with the over-pushing of Hulk Hogan and the Bischoff Family. More importantly, though, they go off on several side tangents this week, including:

-Dusty debuting his new superhero alter-ego, Wrong Opinion Man

-Matt’s love for early ’90s WCW

-Just how exactly was the Shockmaster supposed to get over in the first place, even if he hadn’t tripped and fallen flat on his face during his big debut?

And a whole lot more nonsense, and it’s only worth about an hour of your time, so get in the festive holiday mood and give it a download why don’t you.

Stunt granny TNA Audio Show #7

TNA Audio #6 – The Ghost Of Big Dick Dudley

Silly babyface, champagne is for heels.

This week, Dusty and Matt focus on the February 16 edition of TNA Impact Wrestling. This is a very special Impact, because it just so happened to fall on Dusty’s birthday. Did TNA celebrate Dusty’s birthday properly? Well, you can find out by listening to this audio as our intrepid heroes delve into such topics as:

-Why do fat ECW alums have such great calves?

-So Cal Val must have used her stroke backstage with the powers to be because she appeared on this episode no fewer than two times!

-Who exactly was that MMA announcer jabroni and why was he being interviewed by Christy Hemme?

-Why is it that Brandon Jacobs is tougher than any wrestler in the locker room?

And a whole lot more stuff about a show that they both enjoyed, in an audio replete with Under Siege and Daria references for your entertainment, and it’s only going to cost you about an hour of your time, so if you have a heart at all, you’ll wish Dusty a happy happy birthday by downloading this bad boy immediately.

Stunt Granny TNA Audio Show #6

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