Poor Joe Henning

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Poor Joe Hennig now holds the honor of having the two worst ring names in pro wrestling history. Curt Axel is slightly less ridiculous than Michael McGillicutty, but holy crap, just the same.

Is it so wrong to acknowledge and borrow from and steal from the past? Why not have him be all, my father was Mr. Perfect, and perfection runs through my veins. Everything I’ve ever done in life, school, athletics, girls, you know it, and it’s all come easy to me. So the competition in the WWE? I don’t sweat that at all. And give him a nickname that suggests or hints at Perfection? What the fuck is wrong with that?

And Ted DiBiase Jr. Why not have him be all, I can take money out of my dad’s account any time I want. I could buy this whole arena if I felt like it. Spoiled rich kid trying to live up to his dad’s reputation. Give him a fucking bodyguard. What else is Ezekiel doing with his life these days?

Is any of this bad? Is it bad because it’s unoriginal? I would argue that it’s at least better than this awful, awful trend of bad names and one note gimmicks. If a little girl happened upon WWE programming, she would probably think Dolph Ziggler calls himself because he likes dolphins. This has to fucking stop. -Dusty

Top 10 Survivor Series Elimination Matches

We here at Stunt Granny are suckers for nostalgia, so when we think of Survivor Series, we don’t think of some queefy triple threat match with John Cena, CM Punk and Ryback. We hearken back to the days when teams of five (or four) strive to survive! You know, hence the name of the event. At its inception, the Survivor Series pay-per-view was composed of elimination matches, with the goal of survival at the expense of the entire opposing team. Then they started fucking with the format, and now it’s a bunch of singles matches, with the token bone thrown at us older fans of one, maybe two elimination matches.

Well screw you, WWE, we’ve compiled a list of the top 10 Survivor Series elimination matches of all time! We’ve scoured YouTube for copyright infringers (them, not us) and found most of these matches for your viewing pleasure. If you find one that we couldn’t, leave the link in a comment and we’ll post it. (Don’t rip it and upload yourself; remember, we’re not the ones breaking the law 🙂 )

Side note: How was the 1989 event so damn good?? The worst match featured the top draw and two of the best workers of all time!

1988
Powers of Pain & Rockers & Hart Foundation & British Bulldogs & Young Stallions
vs.
Demolition & Brain Busters & Bolsheviks & Fabulous Rougeaus & Conquistadors

1989
Ultimate Warrior & Jim Neidhart & Shawn Michaels & Marty Jannetty
vs.
Andre the Giant & Arn Anderson & Haku & Bobby “The Brain” Heenan

Macho King Randy Savage & Earthquake & Dino Bravo & Greg Valentine
vs.
Hacksaw Jim Duggan & Bret Hart & Ronnie Garvin & Hercules

Dusty Rhodes & Brutus Beefcake & Red Rooster & Tito Santana
vs.
Big Boss Man, Bad News Brown, Rick Martel and Honky Tonk Man

Rick Rude & Mr. Perfect & Fabulous Rougeaus
vs.
Roddy Piper & Jimmy Snuka & Bushwhackers

1991
Ric Flair, The Mountie, Ted DiBiase, & Warlord
vs.
Roddy Piper, Bret Hart, Virgil, & Davey Boy Smith

1993
Marty Jannetty, Randy Savage, Razor Ramon, & The 1-2-3 Kid
vs.
Irwin R. Schyster, Diesel, Rick Martel, & Adam Bomb

1994
Razor Ramon & 1-2-3 Kid & Davey Boy Smith & Headshrinkers (Fatu & Sionne)
vs.
Shawn Michaels & Diesel & Owen Hart & Jim Neidhart & Jeff Jarrett

1995
Shawn Michaels & Ahmed Johnson & Davey Boy Smith & Psycho Sid
vs.
Yokozuna & Owen Hart & Razor Ramon & Dean Douglas

2001
The Rock & Chris Jericho & Undertaker & Kane & Big Show
vs.
Steve Austin & Kurt Angle & Booker T & Rob Van Dam & Shane McMahon

2003
Randy Orton & Chris Jericho & Christian & Scott Steiner & Mark Henry
vs.
Shawn Michaels & Rob Van Dam & Booker T & Bubba & D-Von Dudley

Stunt Granny Poll: What wrestler are you most embarrassed to admit you once cheered for?

We sometimes pull out old VHS tapes or DVDs of past wrestling cards, and as we all know, pulling out never works. We’re often embarrassed watching the colorful characters of yesteryear uncharismatically shuffle around our 19-inch TV sets, our thumbs on the “stop” button in case someone comes into the room. Who are you most embarrassed to admit you cheered like a wildman for back in the day? We have a list above, but of course pro wrestling has brought us some of the most poorly thought-out ideas in entertainment, so the list could go on and on like Chris Jericho’s 1,004 holds. Let us know what you think!

PWO – Season 3 – Episode 25

 

Is that Michael "The Bomber" Facade? Find out after the jump.

The show started with Johnny Gargano coming into the arena. Jason Bane stopped him and told him he wasn’t welcome. Bane said at least the people that are coming after him are at least doing it without attacking him from behind. Gargano pleaded that he wasn’t the guilty party. Bane threw Gargano’s luggage and told him to dress in the hallway. Gargano looked mad but composed himself quickly.

Analysis: Great way to start the show. Not right into a match or a replay as has been the case recently. Good work from both guys especially Bane who is the locker room leader. Score: +1.

The first match was for the number one contender status for the TV Title held by “Amazing” N8 Mattson. Michael “The Bomber” Facade took on “Omega” Aaron Draven. Facade missed a charge into the corner. Draven walked the ropes and executed a head scissors. Facade was outside the ring and Draven gave him a huracanrana.  Facade took out Draven’s legs while he was on the apron. Facade hit a spinning heel kick for a two count.  Facade gripped Draven in a chin lock.  Facade got in a standing shooting star press. Facade missed on an Arabian Moonsault. Draven hit a spring board leg drop but couldn’t capitalize. Draven enziguiried Facade. Facade got a two count from a German suplex. Facade took off his gi (More smoothly than normal). Facade went to the top rope but was stopped by Draven. “Omega” took control and hit a Flux Capacitor for the victory.

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PWO – Season 3 – Episode 19

We know where it happened in PWO, but we don't know who. By the way, how do I not have this DVD?

 

Joe Dombrowski hyped the six man tag team main event between Johnny Gargano, Gregory Iron & Hobo Joe against Sex Appeal. Gargano joined Dombrowski for commentary.
 
Benjamin Boone was accompanied by N8 Mattson to the ring for his match in the #1 Contendership Tournament for the PWO Heavyweight Title.  Michael “The Bomber” Facade was Boone’s opponent. Gargano complimented both potential opponents for his title.  Facade caught Boone with a drop kick off the top rope as he came into the ring. Boone mismanaged a moonsault but eventually muscled Facade up for a power slam. Gargano said that Boone wrestles like a bear by mauling and staying on top of you. Boone delay suplexed Facade but only got a two count of it. Boone threw facade outside the ring, distracted the ref and allowed Mattson to get in a couple of cheap shots before tossing Facade back into the ring. Boone applied the bear claw to Facade but he came back at the two and a half count. Facade used his speed to duck around Boone’s offense and to quickly strike.  Facade hit a good looking spring board spinning wheel kick.  Facade went up for a top rope moonsault but Mattson hit him with the TV Title. The referee counted Facade out.
 
Analysis: Perfect ending to the match since Facade will be taking on Mattson for the TV Title soon. Well wrestled match to that point. I was laughing at Facade having problems getting his gi off for a Jeff Hardy like girl scream moment. Gargano got a phone call about half way through the match and left Dombrowski flying solo. Dombrowski asked him what it was for but Gargano didn’t explain. Score: +1.
 
Doctor Monstrous said that she will be making her debut soon. She told all evil doers to be aware because she’s coming for them. Someone off screen called for Portia to come to her photo shoot. Doctor Monstrous shook her head and said she’s not Portia.
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