If only I could find an 80-minute video of Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels; enjoy this contest instead, from my favorite video game. Then check out what that weirdo Vince McMahon continuously refers to as a Hollywood Backlot “Bra.” Creep.
Hey, got 62 minutes to kill? Torture yourself by watching the Ironman Match between Bret Hart and Shawn Michaels, and then vote for this overrated, laborious hunk of junk instead of…well…OK, maybe you have a point. Excited to see which of the other two barely-contenders (the six-man and the Backlot Brawl) makes it.
OK, I admit, Lawrence Taylor vs. Bam Bam Bigelow wasn’t all that bad, but leave it to the Clique (Diesel, Shawn Michaels, Razor Ramon, 1-2-3 Kid on the outside) to have the best matches of the night at WrestleMania. That still doesn’t excuse WMXI from being the huge stinker that it was; broken microphones, shitty celebrities, grandeur abound!
Well, this one’s a no-brainer: There *is* no best! Nope, no amount of cocaine could push even Lawrence Taylor to a good match. (Acceptable at best, come on, people.) So vote for the lesser of all seven evils, and let’s see where the chips fall. (Hey, wait, LT was a New York Football Giant, why isn’t he appearing at this year’s event? Would it kill WWE to put him in the Hall of Fame? Oh, yes, yes it would. Never mind.)
Alright, here are your no-brainer winners from WrestleMania X: Doink & Dink vs. Bam Bam & Luna, and Earthquake vs. Adam Bomb! If the videos above look slightly different than that, it’s because your vertical horizontal is out on your monitor.
Man, 1993 was rotten. When one of your best matches features Crush, I don’t care how rosy your colored glasses are, that’s kinda sad. That said, a lot of us still have fond memories of WrestleMania IX, from the outdoor setting, to the introduction of Jim Ross, to the promise of no Hulk Hogan in the main event, to the shock of Hulk Hogan in the main event. The card had a few interesting matches on paper (for the time) but anyone could see through the paper. We just sat back, took it all in, let Bobby Heenan entertain the hell out of us for three hours, and years later chose these two stinkers as the best matches at WMIX.
Got some catching up to do, so let’s breeze through the voting on WrestleMania IX. It should be an easy one, since there were no good matches. Choose wisely!
Now here are two kick-ass matches from 1992: Ric Flair vs. Randy Savage for the WWF Title, and Roddy Piper vs. Bret Hart for the Intercontinental Title. (Can’t find a video of Hart vs. Piper, dang it!) I don’t know if this is a testament to the roster depth at the time, WWF’s willingness to keep title belts off people with names like Repo Man and Skinner, or the general greatness of these four wrestlers. And they weren’t even the main event of the show!
Playing catch-up here, so let’s get right into the vote for WrestleMania VIII’s best matches. I’ve stated many times that my favorite wrestling match is Randy Savage vs. Ric Flair from this card, but Bret Hart vs. Roddy Piper was also brilliant for a handful of reasons, and who knows, maybe some of you liked Owen Hart vs. Skinner. Vote and let us know!